Long Hollow

Super Moon and other Sweet!s of the Week

I've already jumped onto the Weekend Express, but I'm taking advantage of a pit stop to post my Saturday Sweet! List from the past week before I get whisked into the next one...

 

Saturday: catching the Super Moon low on the horizon; waking to the sound of unexpected rain

(Not the best capture, but enough to trigger my memory of standing on my friend Nancy's back porch watching it rise in the sky over the pasture.) 

Sunday: Mass with dear friends in a beautiful historic church; sunlight streaming through stained glass windows; barbecue chicken plates benefiting a volunteer fire department; a quick visit with your son, future daughter-in-law, and grandpuppy; Gruene, Texas, even for just a quick stop

Monday: an omelette made with fresh veggies from a friend's garden; new tires on your car; spending time with your baby girl 

Tuesday: your husband bringing you flowers; finishing tasks that weighed on your mind

(from a yucca plant that was knocked over in the thunder storm)

Wednesday: soft raindrops on a morning walk; box turtles resting near a pond; sleeping dogs; friends responding to a prayer request; grilled cheese sandwiches a la Tom

Thursday: an unexpected paid work day (cha-ching!); second graders; Ocean Week in an elementary school; storm clouds making way for sunshine long enough to walk your puppies

Friday: gathering with friends and 1/3 of your kids for dinner, even if the band (and dancing) is rained out; sunsets and storm clouds over a lake; rainbows

 

Hope you all had a wonderful week and the next one is even better. And in case my Mother's Day post runs a few days late, Happy Mother's Day to all of you who have experienced the joy and heartbreak of motherhood, whether you ever gave birth or not.

Here's a flower for you...

(the onions are blooming!) 

What Do You Worry About?

 

The older I get, the less I worry. 

That doesn't mean I don't worry. Just that I'm beginning to realize worry doesn't help anything.

Prayer does, so the older I get, the more I pray.... that God will show me what I can do to help the situation, and if there's nothing I can do, to help me step back and let him take care of things.

...And that no matter what, I never lose hope.

When I do worry, it's about my kids... our finances... Tom's health... um... I think that's it. Next to those, nothing else seems to matter that much.

Oh, I pray about much more than that... issues that my friends and family are dealing with... social problems in the world... but I'm talking about that knotted up, gray-cloud-of-despair, helpless type of worry.

I recently came across this list that author F. Scott Fitzgerald gave to his 11-year-old daughter, Scottie, in 1933.  

Things to worry about:

Worry about courage
Worry about cleanliness
Worry about efficiency
Worry about horsemanship

Things not to worry about: 

Don’t worry about popular opinion
Don’t worry about dolls
Don’t worry about the past
Don’t worry about the future
Don’t worry about growing up
Don’t worry about anybody getting ahead of you
Don’t worry about triumph
Don’t worry about failure unless it comes through your own fault
Don’t worry about mosquitoes
Don’t worry about flies
Don’t worry about insects in general
Don’t worry about parents
Don’t worry about boys
Don’t worry about disappointments
Don’t worry about pleasures
Don’t worry about satisfactions

Things to think about: 

What am I really aiming at? 
How good am I really in comparison to my contemporaries in regard to:

(a) Scholarship
(b) Do I really understand about people and am I able to get along with them? 
(c) Am I trying to make my body a useful instrument or am I neglecting it? 

With dearest love,

Daddy

I don't agree with him on all of the items (horsemanship?), but I do on quite a few (especially the "nots") and like that he divided it between things we have control over and things we don't.

I wish I'd had the forethought to give my kids a list like this when they were younger. 

They probably wouldn't have listened to me, though.

I wonder if F. Scott's daughter listened to him? Probably not. We all seem to have to learn the hard way, right?

So... what do you worry about? 

 

Adventurous Kids, No Dead Armadillos on the Porch, and other sweet things

My kids are off adventuring this weekend. I'm living vicariously through them. That's my right as their mother, isn't it?

The oldest and his love are in San Diego... yesterday they caught a glimpse of a migrating grey whale while kayaking!

The other two are off caving, separately. One in Austin and one a bit west of here.

A portion of my book takes place in a cave, so I asked them to take notes and photos for me, and they graciously agreed. (I had plans to go caving myself last weekend as research, but didn't make it because of my birthday party. No regrets!)

I love, love, LOVE it that these babies of mine love exploring and experiencing the wonders of this world, even though it keeps me on my knees praying in hyper-drive. 

On another note, is it just me turning a year older or has time suddenly shifted into a higher gear? This past week has gone by in a blur. My head is spinning and I've trouble keeping track of what day it is, much less my email!

But I managed to keep track of my Sweet!s, and here they are...

Saturday: being totally blown away and humbled by the generosity of your friends and family; a friend's beautiful paintings in person; sweet friends' faces you didn't expect to see

Sunday: Mass with your husband and son; the greening of a vineyard; fresh brick oven pizza; enjoying the last episode of season one of The Game of Thrones with 2/3 of your kids; finally getting a chance to play with your new Mac computer

Monday: new computer technology (amazing!); butterflies and dragonflies; friends who find you things they know you'll love at garage sales

Tuesday: high school theater classes; getting paid to watch the movie "Gandhi"; evening sunlight turning weeds into art

 

(the fish that swallowed Gepetto in Pinocchio - the artist is the girl on the left)

Wednesday:; finishing a good book; being able to help your baby; photography workshops; the frogs' midnight chorus welcoming you 

Thursday: watching the night sky turn into a cloudless sunrise; a fourth-grader's definition of happiness; teaching adverbs to fourth-graders

Friday: sleeping in; a day off to play with your new computer; new running shoes, long overdue and half off the regular price; sharing a quesadilla and a movie at home with your sweetie; your dogs not dragging the dead armadillo up onto the porch

Saturday: a wiggly, grinning puppy, first thing in the morning; dragonflies filling the air; pink cactus blossoms; your kids doing research for your book for you, and calling to let you know they're okay

Um, did you notice the 'dead armadillo' thing up there? I spared you the photo I took of it (it's a sickness, I tell you, taking pics of everything!)

Tom and I discovered the poor deceased thing on our walk Friday afternoon. In fact, he almost stepped right on it.

We suspect our dogs had something to do with its death, but have no proof. If they're guilty of its demise, I'm sure they only did it to protect us from great harm.

Sigh.

I really am just grateful they didn't feel the need to deposit that nasty thing on the front porch as is their usual custom with dead animals. We're making progress!

Vultures have been partying around here, as you can imagine, soaring through the skies. Since I didn't post the armadillo's portrait, I'll leave you with the vulture's... I bet he added the dead armadillo to his sweet! list!

What were your sweet! moments of the week? Share!

Mary Poppins and other Sweet!s of the week

I would lie on the wooden floor for hours... or at least it seemed like hours... listening to my Mary Poppins soundtrack album, over and over. Asthma held my lungs hostage - each breath was a major accomplishment - so lying there listening to "Step in Time" and "Feed the Birds" was about all I could do and the songs are ingrained in my memory.

It was, and still is, my favorite Disney movie. I don't remember the first time I saw it, but I remember going back as a teen with my sister, imagining strange looks from everyone else in line because we were the only ones who didn't have someone under the age of 5 with us.

Thanks to the miracle of recorded movies a la Beta, VHS, and DVD, I've watched it hundreds of times, with and without my children at various ages.

And that's why my heart skipped a beat when my dear friends let me know they were taking me to the stage performance for my birthday. 

We went Thursday night, first stopping for dinner at Hyde Park Grill. The stage production is a teensy bit different than the movie, but I could still sing along with most of the songs and the sets and actors' performances were amazing. 

A very sweet! night, thanks to some very sweet friends. Thank you Mary Kay, Karen, and Conni! 

Conni's not pictured... she's going Sunday with her twenty-something daughter, but we made sure to get her one of these bracelets! We've formed a new club!

Now I'm already halfway through a sweet! weekend. Two-thirds of the kids are home for the second weekend in a row, just because they wanted to. I like that.

And as if those aren't enough, here are a few other sweet! moments from the past week...

 

Sunday: Easter Mass; all the kids home; dinner with friends; watching kids on an Easter egg hunt; a call from your mama

Monday: new flowers popping up; watching your puppies hunt for lizards and swim in the creek 

Tuesday: shampoos by Clint (bittersweet... he's retiring from shampoos); a new cut and color by Michael; Panda Express fortune cookie fortunes

Wednesday: kids of all ages blowing bubbles; taking photos of a sweet friend and her family

Thursday: shoes on your feet and insect spray close by when you spot a 6-inch centipede swishing across your kitchen floor; the imaginations of 4th graders; watching kids swinging and playing a rowdy game of kickball on a school playground; dinner and Mary Poppins with dear friends

Friday: Friday the 13ths; spending the day with your sweetie; watching another episode of "The Game of Thrones" with 2/3 of your kids; discovering you won a "Post of the Week" from Hilary at The Smitten Image (Thanks again, Hilary!)

Saturday: spring mornings; your son and his dad working together on his "new" car

I hope you've all had a week full of sweets and the next one plain overflows with them!

 

Love, Allelujah!

"Jesus Christ is risen today..."

That song has been playing in my head all day. It started playing as soon as I opened my eyes this morning and then it was the first and last hymn we sang at Mass. It's still running through my mind, lifting my spirit, spilling sunshine into my heart.

It's Easter Sunday, allelujah!

All of my kids are here, but I didn't prepare baskets this morning - just set a few boxes of malted milk Robin's Eggs and Reese's peanut butter eggs out on the table. I didn't even have all of my kids at church with me. TG is sick, bless her heart.

But Easter is more than all of that - it's the lightness of being in the very center of me that says everything is going to be okay. 

"Because Christ rose from the dead, we know that sin and death and Satan have been decisively defeated."

~ Billy Graham

I hope you have all felt that lightness of being on this blessed Easter day!

 

 

Traipsing through Cemeteries and other Sweet!s

It might seem unusual to wander through a cemetery on your birthday, but that's what I did yesterday.

There's a small one dating from the 1850's down the highway toward Marble Falls. When I heard it was blanketed with bluebonnets, I couldn't wait to visit it. There's just something about wildflowers growing beside a headstone that I find quite beautiful.  A reminder of fragility of life, the cycle of life, of life after death.

How appropriate for a birthday, especially one that falls on Good Friday, right?

After exploring the cemetery, offering prayers for the souls of those resting there and their families, we drove on to Marble Falls, where we visited a few eclectic antique and art shops in the old part of town (Tom and Daniel are such good sports!), and enjoyed dinner at a restaurant overlooking the lake.

Best of all, later that evening I got to share the traditional birthday cheesecake with all three of my kids. 

Just icing on a week full of sweet! moments...

Sunday: fields of bluebonnets and prairie verbena; pizza from a brick oven; sitting on the back deck on a beautiful spring night with your son and talking for hours

Monday: daily chats with your mom; finding a pair of shoes in your closet you'd forgotten about; butterflies; talking about your day over dinner with your sweetie

Tuesday: four-year-olds... especially their smiles and hugs and imaginations; working with a friend; reading a new book

Wednesday: a surprise birthday lunch with friends; creme brulee; a vineyard, caliche road and tin roof glowing in moonlight

Thursday: birthday cards in the mail; a birthday call from a dear friend and your uncle; practicing the drums; a full moon welcoming your birthday

Friday: greeting another birthday morning; breakfast, courtesy of your husband and son; birthday surprises in the mailbox; birthday wishes via phone, email and Facebook; bluebonnets blanketing a cemetery; sharing cheesecake and a movie with all three kids

Saturday: a lazy Saturday at home 

I hope you had a week full of sweet! moments, too!

 

The Day Before 53

Butterflies flitted around me on my walk this morning, hopping from flower to flower too fast for me to capture in my camera. (The one above is from last week!)

I imagined they were celebrating the beautiful morning... dancing a springtime jig of joy. It was contagious - I felt joy rising inside of me in gratitude for the sunshine, the blue skies, the color popping up around me, and especially for the chance to turn 53 tomorrow.

Life isn't perfect, but it has moments of simple glory that can soften the darkness with a whisper, enough to help us see beauty in those less glorious moments. I've been blessed with tons of those moments.

But suddenly I saw indecisiveness in the butterflies' glorious dance... an inability to settle on any one flower long enough to drink much of its nectar, to truly enjoy it or benefit from it.

Was I like the butterflies, hopping from one job or hobby to another too quickly, not allowing myself time on any to truly absorb them?

Ah, birthdays always make me think too much.

I decided not to worry if I'm hopping in too many directions or not. Sharing a birthday with Good Friday is enough to reflect upon. What better gift could I receive than the one Christ gave to me?

I have already received some sweet birthday surprises, though... a few cards and phone calls, a party with friends next weekend, and (bless you Mary Kay, Conni and Karen!), I get to go see the hit Broadway musical Mary Poppins when it plays Austin next week!

My gift to myself will be to re-focus on my health... getting enough sleep, eating right, and making my workouts a priority... and also to focus on each moment at hand, rather than letting my brain wander too far into the past or the future... or onto Facebook when I'm supposed to be writing.

All three of my kids will be here for a while this weekend to help me celebrate Easter and my birthday. Icing on the cake, for sure! Unlike my zip-lining adventure last year, I didn't have a desire to cross off any big Bucket List things for my birthday, other than visiting Enchanted Rock again, and we already did that.

I imagine, besides going to church, we'll just hang around the house, walk the dogs, watch a movie, talk...

Okay, I admit I'm hoping for at least one game of ping-pong.

But whatever we do, it will be perfect, and I know I'll be reflecting on all of it, tucking it away in my heart and giving thanks.

God gave us the gift of life; it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well.

~Voltaire

 

Catching My Breath (and other Sweet!s)

I haven't blogged in a whole week. I think that's a record. 

Snippets and ideas for posts have popped in my head - random words are scribbled on scraps of paper all over the house and in the car - but I haven't been able to stop long enough to work them into full posts.

This morning Life is moving slower and I'm hoping today I can focus my attention on those poor, neglected Good Intentions and Need-To-Do's I see moping in a dusty corner.

It's been a fun week, though. No exotic vacations or anything, but just Life and all of the challenges and adventures and love it provides. There have been beautiful spring days that turned into powerful thunderstorms with blustery winds and cold temperatures... which meant stinky country dogs cowering in the laundry room... but we're back to Spring and warmth and outside dogs now.

While I'm grateful for the rain, I'm not so grateful for the mosquitoes it awakened. They buzzed and bit me every step of my walk this morning. You can be sure I'll thoroughly douse myself with repellent every morning from now on.

Yesterday, TG fixed me breakfast... a delicious sauteed veggies/scrambled eggs concoction she prepared every morning over Christmas break that set my stomach growling with its divine smell. But it was always several hours after I'd already eaten.

I'm too lazy to go to that much trouble myself first thing in the morning, but yesterday I slept late after a sleep-deprived weekend and she woke up early to prepare for a Spring Break trip to the coast... which means we woke up at the same exact time! So when I saw the eggs and veggies coming out of the fridge, I worked out a deal with her involving laundry.

One of the best deals I've ever made! It turned out to be just as delicious as it smelled, and sustaining enough for a day on the run that included seeing her disappear into one of five chartered buses for an overnight drive (and praying the whole way home for their safety!)

Sunday morning I met a blog friend for the first time in person. Non-bloggers (or non-FlickRers, etc.) probably don't understand how exciting that is.  They might have trouble understanding how you can become friends with total strangers you connect to online but have never seen face-to-face, but I can assure you those friendships are just as real as any other. 

Wolf, of Just Add Father, was in town for a dad blogger conference. He delayed his flight home to meet me, Tom, and 2/3 of my kids for brunch downtown at the Driskill Hotel's 1886 Cafe and Bakery. It was just like meeting a long-time friend I hadn't seen in a while. 

Wolf is a pseudonym (he explains why he uses one on his blog) so we had some fun taking this photo below. I wanted one I could post here. (I'm sure the people sitting at nearby tables were wondering what the heck we were doing!) 

We chatted awhile on the sidewalk after eating, but knew it was time to part ways when my kids (ages 20 and 23!) got restless and started roughhousing on the sidewalk. 

Some things never change!

Actually, we needed to leave anyway because Wolf wanted to walk around and see the Austin sights before heading for the airport, and we wanted to get back to the house to visit with my oldest and his fiance before they had to leave.

They were in town for a wedding. After the reception on Saturday night, they brought friends back to the house with them and all of us were up really, really late visiting and laughing. I always enjoy seeing those grown-up kids, even though it makes me feel old, wondering how these kids who I swear were in middle school yesterday are now out of college, working, married...

Totally worth getting only 4 hours of sleep.

No, really it was.

<yawn>

Anyway, Sunday afternoon I grilled chicken and enjoyed a quick dinner with them, before dashing off (late!) to my writer's group meeting.

Even after all this time, my book is still a misshapen piece of clay. Writing is so dang hard. But with these women's input and guidance, it's beginning to take shape, although it still needs lots and lots of pinching, molding, scoring...

It's tough - even painful - but I'm grateful to them and willing to do whatever work is necessary to have a finished piece by the end of the year.  

Saturday I took a short road trip along Highway 281 to San Antonio. A friend of mine hosted a Silpada jewelry party for me.

Highway 281 runs through the Texas hill country and several small towns... a beautiful drive, even on a rainy day like Saturday. I spotted my first bluebonnets, splashes of blue drizzled along the roadside. I promised myself I'd drive out this week on a sunny day and take some photos.

Jewelry parties are always fun, what with the food and drinks, the sparkly silver bling, and meeting lots of interesting women, but this one was especially fun because Jackie and I went to high school together, but didn't really know each other until just recently. We reconnected thanks to Facebook and discovered we didn't live that far from each other.

Here we are with another high school friend, Marilyn, who came to the party. She lives even closer to Jackie but they didn't even realize it until recently.

And here I am with one of my dearest friends, Nancy, the first person I met when we moved to Lago. She now lives near San Antonio, so she and her daughter took advantage of the situation and came to the party, too. 

You just can't beat reconnecting with friends, playing with pretty jewelry, and making money at the same time, can you?

The rest of the week was a blur of writing, reading, subbing at the high school, trying to catch up on emails, and watching the Hollow explode in greens, blue, yellows, pinks, and purples. I'm hoping not to get lost in the busy-ness of this week.

I do want to mention Tuesday, though. I spent the day swim suit shopping with TG in preparation for this trip to the coast. There's always more under the surface than shopping, though... there's talking, laughing, sharing, and just soaking up the sight of her.

In one store, going through a clearance rack, I came across the perfect shirt to describe the way I feel...

We took turns trying it on and snapping pics with my iPhone, but in the end, I just went ahead and bought it. How could I not? It was cheap and fit perfectly, in so many ways!

And now for the official Sweet! report:

Monday: time to be still and breathe, sitting on a rock beside a pond, listening to running water and chattering birds, watching silly dogs and flirting dragonflies

Tuesday: hours spent with your daughter... shopping, talking, laughing; finding a really good fortune in your Panda Express cookie

Wednesday: porch swings; flowers and tree buds popping out everywhere

Thursday: finishing a great book; high school one-act plays

Friday: rainy days when a drought is fresh in your memory; some of your kids home for the weekend

Saturday: clouds sitting on hilltops; roadsides sprinkled with bluebonnets; a job that lets you catch up with 'old' friends and meet new ones; sangria; staying up late visiting with your kids and their friends, who used to be kids but somehow turned into adults; the birth of a great-nephew and photos on Facebook

Sunday: meeting a blog friend in person for the first time; brunch and people-watching at the Driskill Cafe; an afternoon with your son and future daughter-in-law; a writing group that keeps your ego in check

Monday: sleeping in after a sleep-deprived, busy, busy weekend; spending time with your baby girl 

Wishing each of you a week full of sweet moments!

Sky Blue, Sketches, and other Sweet!s (and Bittersweets) of the week

Sky Blue is my favorite crayon color of all time.

Today, God picked it to color the sky. I could imagine him sprawled on the floor of heaven, opening that big box of 96 (the one with the sharpener,) pulling out the Sky Blue, then, with side to side strokes, filling in the entire sky. 

For hours I lay under it on a folding lounge chair of the same color... even reading from a book with a Sky Blue color... wearing jean shorts, flip-flops, and a tank top the same shade of green as the new grass and fresh tree buds, my skin soaking up the sun like the dry winter ground soaks up the spring showers.

I rarely read for hours in a row like that and it felt so good to just lose myself in a story. It helped that I could call it "working"... it was the latest BlogHer Book Club book I'm going to review. I can't tell you the title yet, but I can tell you that I can hardly put the dang book down.

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Yesterday I came home from work to find a mysterious manila envelope on my desk. The name on the return address looked vaguely familiar, but I couldn't place it.

 Inside I found a heart-melting sketch of my Max puppy... 

It turns out my sweet sister commissioned a wonderfully talented friend of hers, Susan Bromlow, a high school classmate, to sketch this drawing from one of my photos of Max on my blog. Susan (as you can see) is a talented artist. Click HERE to view more of her work.

What a sweet surprise and precious treasure! Thank you so much, Brenda and Susan! 

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Here are a few other sweet moments from the past week....

Monday: a good report from your doctor; lunch with your husband who took the day off

Tuesday: paychecks in the mailbox; an hour on the phone with your oldest, just catching up; clearing out closets and giving things away; a new part time job, helping with the income you need to keep working on your book without finding a full time job

Wednesday: hearing, then seeing, two red-tailed hawks streaking through the Hollow; a golden sunset that fills the sky and stretches to the horizon

Thursday: a gorgeous blue Mexican Jay couple, straw in beaks, busy building a nest; a last-minute, long-overdue catch-up lunch with friends; meeting lifetime friends from out of town for a spur-of-the-moment dinner 

Friday: walking at sunrise; another paycheck in the mailbox; bees buzzing fragrant mountain laurel blooms; daffodils and redbuds; your son's face, up close and in person

Saturday: making an unhappy customer happy again; spending time with both sons plus your future daughter-in-law and her family; an amazing sketch of your puppy arriving in the mail box; a friend's support of your writing

Sunday: sleeping in; an afternoon spent reading in the sunshine

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Before I could publish this post, Tom's dad called to let us know Tom's Aunt Marg had passed away. Please pray for the repose of her soul and for her family. Hearing of her death isn't sweet, of course, but the memories of her in my heart sure are.

Soon after Tom and I were married, we traveled to Wisconsin to meet his dad's side of the family. Aunt Marg opened her home to us, hosting a corn roast and sharing tons of family photos and mementoes.

A few years later, she spent about a week with us. In turn for teaching me how to cross stitch (I became an addict for several years) we took her to Gilley's where she even rode the mechanical bull.

                                   

Summer before last we saw her again in Wisconsin at a family wedding. It had been several years since we'd last seen her... maybe a decade... but she hadn't changed a bit, still as feisty as ever.  She even got out on the dancefloor!

I'm so grateful TG was able to meet her - they really clicked - and for all the memories I have tucked in my heart. Please keep her family in your prayers.

Rest in peace, Aunt Marg. We love you!

Fiction, Fires, Family... and other sweet things

Bonfire sparks drifted up to the sky where clouds parted like curtains and stars crowded the stage, accompanied by the singing creek beside us. No moon softened the darkness - the pitch wall of night rose just beyond the reach of the firelight. 

There was a time not too long ago when I would have feared the darkness, imagining all sorts of danger lurking where my eyes couldn't see. But last night I hugged my jacket around me, craned my neck up to stare at the stars and felt nothing but awe at the beauty of the night and amazement that I ever felt fear standing in its darkness.

I had spent the past day and a half immersed in the world of children's books, listening to authors, agents and editors sharing their stories and experience, offering advice and encouragement to those of us still only dreaming of publication.

Standing there watching the stars break through the clouds, hearing the sizzle and pop of the fire, the trickle of the creek, the frogs singing in the distance... it all just added to the impression that this is a magical world where dreams can come true...

...Especially the small ones like sleeping in for the first time in weeks and meeting my cousin Pat for lunch after two years of trying to match our schedules (which is just ridiculous because she only lives an hour away!)

Pat's a genealogy addict like me, except she's still actively researching. I've had to put myself on a 12-step-program, otherwise I'd get nothing else accomplished!

A few years ago we spent a Saturday tracking down family cemeteries and visiting the Bell County Museum, where we discovered a photo of 'the oldest house in Bell County' hanging on the wall. 

According to writing on the photo, it was built by one of our ancestors. She sent off for a copy of it and today presented me with a framed canvas copy, along with copies of other family mementoes and letters she knew I'd treasure. 

 

 

Well, she's the true treasure! But I was enjoying our time together so much, I completely forgot about getting a photo of us together as I'd planned.

Next time... and by golly, we won't wait another two years for it.

"Our most treasured family heirlooms are our sweet family memories."

~ Unknown

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And now, here are a few Sweet! moments from the past week I remembered to record...

Monday: puppies, stretched out warm and cozy in the laundry room on a rainy, cold morning; making Valentine cyclops cookies with your Valentine

Tuesday: sharing Valentine cookies with your middle son and heart-shaped chocolates with your daughter; a "Happy Valentine's Day, Mom" call from your oldest; searching for fossilized hearts with your sweetie beside a lake, followed by dinner by candlelight and a funny, romantic movie 

Wednesday: a chicken quesadilla for lunch, shared with your honey who decided to take the day off; a little bird outside the window posing for your camera; a job that lets you eat pizza, play with jewelry, sip wine, and catch up with friends while you 'work'

 

 

Thursday: a rare day spent totally at home; a puppy's face in the window reminding you to take a break from the computer

Friday: the sound of raindrops on your umbrella; familiar faces in a roomful of strangers

Saturday: the rain stopping just as you leave the house; a day spent listening and learning from authors, agents and editors; watching the clouds give way to stars; bonfires on a crisp night 

Sunday: late Mass so you can sleep in a bit; a glimpse of a huge red-tailed hawk flying past; a long-overdue lunch with a dear cousin/friend

Hoping you had a week full of sweet!s and are blessed with even more in the week to come! (Share some of yours here!)

The Privilege of a Lifetime

"The privilege of a lifetime is to be yourself."

 ~ Joseph Campbell

 

A big pot of chicken soup is simmering on the stove. From where I sit across the room I can hear the little bubbles playing on the surface and the aroma is making my stomach growl.

I made it for myself, because I'm sick. I don't cook often these days, and when I do, it's usually to whip up some favorite of one of my kids or my husband, although he's gotten quite good at cooking whatever he wants himself.

You see, there are tons of other things I'd rather do with my time besides cook. That's just me, the way I am, and I'm okay with it. Thank goodness my husband is, too.

I thought about this as I chopped up vegetables for the soup earlier, because BlogHer's latest question for their Life Well Lived Getting Happy series is: How do you practice self-acceptance and find unconditional love for yourself? (Part 2 of the question is: How does practicing love first help you attract more love and happiness in your life?)

Well, not cooking if I don't feel like it is one way I practice self-acceptance.

I spent years trying on cooking and crafting and gardening and sewing, and while I enjoyed each one to a certain extent, none of them fit me exactly right. 

Today I'm cooking because I care about myself. I want to get well.

It took years to shed the 'Mommy-Martyr' mentality that made me think everyone else's needs were more important than my own. It's still a trick mirror though... one big incentive to take care of myself is so I can take care of those I love who depend on me. To be healthy if they need me or to just set a good example.

When I eat right, when I run, when I make sure I get enough sleep or play my drums or take time to read or write or take photos or laugh with friends or go dancing with my husband... it's for them as much as it is for myself.

 

Turning 50 was a huge turning point in my self-attitude, like standing before a mirror, evaluating where I'd been, where I still wanted to go and whether or not I was heading in the right direction to get there. Trying to figure out what fit and what should be tossed. I was able to recognize and appreciate the strengths that got me this far, as well as the quirks that make me unique.

Love your neighbor as yourself. ~ Mark 12:31

I forgave myself mistakes made along the way, accepted myself as human, flaws and all, and by doing so, discovered how easy it is to do the same for other people. The key to loving your imperfect neighbor "as yourself" is first loving your imperfect self.

How do you start? Ponder this...

 Where there is no love, put love and there will be love.

~ St. John of the Cross

 

 

So how do you practice self-acceptance and find unconditional love for yourself?

And how does practicing love first help you attract more love and happiness in your life?

Leave your answer here, but also at the main post on BlogHer where you can see other answers. And be sure to enter the sweepstakes for a chance at a Kindle Fire and $50 Amazon Gift Card HERE.

It's already Saturday? (Sweet!)

I'm in a calm spot between a busy week and a busier weekend. We've been blessed with spring-like weather, lately, and I admit I'm ready for it to just stick around. Wildflowers haven't yet ventured our way, but we're being serenaded by birds and frogs and a running creek. Storm clouds and sunshine are taking turns painting the canvas above us.

Middle son is home this weekend which called for a celebration: pizza, wine, and a Netflix double-feature last night (I finally got up the nerve to watch "Interview with a Vampire"! Plus another movie that was pretty good but I can't recall the name. Guess it wasn't that good.)

Even though it was a busy week, I remembered to keep track of my sweet moments. Hope you did, too!

Saturday: a morning walk with girlfriends and dogs to wake your husband in his tent across the creek; fresh kolaches; a sunshine-filled afternoon with friends in a vineyard; kitchen counters overflowing with BBQ, King Cake and tons of other food; a house full of your longtime friends...dancing, laughing, talking; toasting your friendship with shots of Patron followed by cinnamon-sprinkled orange slices

 

 

Sunday: a road trip with a friend with hours to catch up on your lives; being part of a circle of support for a friend mourning her husband; snapping photos of an alligator (from a safe distance); dinner with view of the water; sharing a beautiful sunset with friends; hugs from your parents

 

 

Monday: breakfast by your Daddy, hours of unrushed time with your parents; a quick visit with your sister; missing traffic on your way home

Tuesday: sunshine breaking through morning fog; the wisdom of Winnie-the-Pooh 

Wednesday: Grand Prize on a SheWrites giveaway; a quick visit with your daughter; a phone call from a sweet friend you haven't talked to in a while; sitting on the porch swing on a summer-in-winter evening with your sweetie

Thursday: a puppy's face at the door, first thing in the morning; getting your run out of the way before the sun comes up; a walk along a running creek at dusk with your sweetie, and capturing a photo of the first star of the evening

 

 

Friday: dramatic storm clouds; wind whispering in your ears; pizza, wine and movies with your sweetie and middle son

Saturday: sleeping in before the rush of a busy weekend begins

Hope you've had a week full of sweet moments, too!

Kids, Jewelry, Birthdays, Weddings and other (belated) Sweet!s

A rumble of thunder and whisper of rain woke me in the night. It continues today, another steady, soaking rain falling from a colorless sky. We've had enough rain in the past few weeks that I almost take it for granted, despite the months of drought.

Almost, but not quite. Waking to the sound of rain is still a sweet sound, especially when I can roll over, snuggle deeper into my covers, and go back to sleep.

I would also almost start complaining about the soggy weather... the mud that gets tracked in, the slippery roads... despite those months of drought, but in between our frequent rainy days, we've had warm days with crisp blue skies (Saturday) and cool days with skies of rainless clouds (yesterday.)

I love it when things balance out that way! Very sweet!

Yes, I realize I'm running late with this post. I've been keeping up with my sweet!s this week... but my photos, not so much.

Well, I've been taking plenty, but all of them from the past week were still stashed on my camera until last night. I didn't have a chance until now to tidy my sweet! list and glance through my photos - it was one of those on-the-run weekends that I love, but that leave me breathless!

First, Daniel came home for a visit this weekend. His face is always a sweet sight, but I hadn't seen him since last year, when he moved out to his own place just after Christmas!

So you can imagine how happy I was to see him!

We spent Friday evening talking and watching a movie, just hanging out and relaxing. I was hosting my own Silpada jewelry party (one of my other "hats") the next afternoon, but thought I would have plenty of time Saturday morning to get everything done.

But after letting myself sleep in and then mentally comparing what I had left to do with how much time I had in which to do it, I realized I was wrong!

My kids were lifesavers, though, bless them... they pitched in and helped me pack up the last of our Christmas decorations away, tidy up the house in preparation and followed whatever other orders I barked at them. Such sweet kids!

Consequently, it was a relaxed open house. And what a great way to spend a Saturday afternoon... sitting around a table, sipping wine, munching on yummy snacks, talking to friends and looking at beautiful jewelry!

Tom and I headed out right after the party to help my dear friend Darla celebrate her birthday at Z'Tejas. (It was my first time there, and oh my gosh, it was soooo good! Great twists on traditional Tex Mex... I got the Wild Mushroom Enchiladas.)

(Again, my kids were lifesavers... they helped clean up from the party for me! I just hope Daniel will come home again some day... I don't think he was counting on all the extra chores!) 

Just getting together with these longtime friends from high school is a sweet way to spend a Saturday night, but we were joined by a face none of us had seen since graduation day. We reconnected with Wayne via Facebook and discovered he'd been living in the Austin area for the past fifteen years or so, too. We've probably passed him on the highway a zillion times...

After church Sunday morning, I met my future daughter-in-law in town for another day of wedding venue sightseeing. There are so many possibilities, it's mind-boggling! I'm glad I'm just a tag along and not the one having to make the decision!

I can have fun snapping photos...

And now for my belated list of Sweet! moments from the past week...

Monday: walking at sunrise; checking out wedding venues with your son, his future bride and her family (photos HERE and HERE); one of your blog posts listed on Pioneer Woman's sidebar links

Tuesday: frost sparkling in the caliche road like tiny diamonds; working on your book for hours, even if it doesn't feel like you made much progress

Wednesday: almost getting caught up on your email; a friend pinning a link to your blog on Pinterest; not burning the chicken legs on the grill even though you were distracted with writing; catching a movie with friends; extra-sweet... the movie starred George Clooney and was set in Hawaii ("The Descendants")

Thursday: the excitement and joy of puppies on a morning walk; words flowing onto the page without effort, for a change; a phone call from your sister; your kids helping you take down the Christmas decorations

Friday: fresh morning sunlight; bumping into a friend at the grocery store; the Epiphany; photos of your husband's aunt ziplining in Costa Rica in honor of her 74th birthday!; the sight of your middle son for the first time in two weeks

Saturday: your kids pitching in to get your house ready for your jewelry party; finding out one of your photos was chosen for FlickR's Explore; friends gathered around your table, chatting; a friend putting in an order for jewelry even though she sells it herself, just in hopes you have a good party; celebrating a dear friend's birthday and reconnecting with a friend from long ago

Sunday: kneeling and praying next to your sweetie in church; checking out more wedding venues with your future daughter-in-law; hearing from your oldest, letting you know he made it safely to Arizona for a business trip

(Monday: I didn't plan to add Monday on here, but first thing this morning, I received a message from a friend I've been praying for that he's met 'someone'. It made me smile, inside and out, so I had to add it here.)

I hope you had tons of sweet moments this past week, too. I confess, there are days when I have to think really hard to find one, but I always manage to... and often it triggers recollection of a few more. If you haven't tried it yet, I encourage you to!

 

He Said, She Said

He said, "Will you marry me?"

She said, "Yes."

 

After dating five years... after hanging on to a relationship and seeing each other every chance they could while going after their dreams and getting their degrees at different colleges and getting jobs in different cities and sharing custody of their puppy...

 

...they're getting married.

 

 

Sigh.

 

I get to be the mother of the groom, at last!

(Congratulations to the cutest couple in the world! I wish you much happiness and hearts that love fiercely enough to withstand whatever life tosses into your path!)

 

"Lord, help us to remember when we first met and the strong love that grew between us..."

Sweets On Christmas Eve Eve

Who is rich? He that rejoices in his portion.

~The Talmud

Dishes overflow the kitchen sink.

Fudge waits in a lined pan to be cut into squares and shared.

Three twenty-something kids and I huddle around a laptop within the glow of Christmas tree lights, laughing at You-Tube videos.

Favorite cookies fill gold and silver tins, tumble off of plates and cool on a metal rack on the kitchen counter... Chocolate Chip, courtesy of TG, while I made a last minute dash to the grocery store, and peanut butter Cyclops Cookies by me, assisted by Daniel.

I haven't taken one single photograph. The one above was taken earlier this week.

There are no gifts piled under the tree... the cookies are our gift. Our laughter is our gift. We are our gift.

I'm headed out in the morning with my kids, leaving Tom behind to care for the puppies... his gift to me. For the first time in decades, I'll wake Christmas morning in my childhood home and enjoy Christmas dinner with my parents. What better gift could I receive? 

 

And now for a few my sweet! moments of the past week. I hope you've gathered a nice, shiny collection yourself!

 

Sunday: placing your gifts under the church Giving Tree, imagining the faces of two 9-year-old boys when they open the gifts you bought for them; recovering treasured ornaments you thought were lost forever; fresh tamales and guacamole; your son's rants about the commercialization of Christmas

Monday: rainy days (good for writing); getting back to work on a dusty project; forgiving scales after a week of peanut butter and chocolate bars

Tuesday: tangerine sunrises framed in a window; brisk mornings and frisky dogs; listening to your daddy's stories; your pop-in-law finally released from the hospital; Pinterest, at last!; chili so spicy it makes your brow sweat on a cold night

Wednesday: your husband and daughter home with you, but quiet enough that you can still write; your college student child getting the official report of good grades for her past (really tough!) semester

Thursday: walking along a fog-shrouded country road; driving on a two-lane highway that zigs, zags, rises and falls over and through the hills; a surprise Christmas bonus; Lammes dark chocolate pecan and caramel Longhorns; a glass of wine and a movie with your son after seven nonstop hours on your feet

Friday: warm chocolate chip cookies baked by your daughter; your son helping you bake his favorite cookies; the mailroom scene in Elf; all three of your kids home, laughing over You-Tube videos and watching movies

Saturday: traveling with all three of your kids; Christmas Eve spent with your parents for the first time in decades

Another very special sweet... Kamana of Journalling Through Photos recently posted a series of "Six Question" interviews with women bloggers. I was honored and humbled that she asked me to participate.

Go HERE to read the interview, but be sure to stay there awhile... meet the other bloggers she interviewed and also take a stroll through Kamana's beautiful poetry and photographs. Thank you again, Kamana!

I wish all of you a blessed Christmas, filled with peace and joy, love and laughter...

I'm also joining Otto at Münchow's Creative Photo Blog in challenging each of you to use Christmas to make a difference in someone's life who, instead of love and joy during these holidays, feels despair or sadness. Perhaps they've lost a job or a loved one or have just forgotten the meaning of the season. Even if all you do is smile at a stranger, try to do something. ("...it might be the only sunshine they see.")

I'm challenging myself as well.

Christmas is not as much about opening our presents as opening our hearts.

~Janice Maeditere

Gifts

O Sunrise, 
splendor of light eternal and sun of righteousness:
Come and enlighten those who dwell in darkness 
and the shadow of death.

This sunrise was a gift, a splash of tangerine through my window reminding me that light conquers darkness, that each new day is a promise fulfilled, a gift to savor.

I rose at 4:30 this morning to write... a gift to myself but also to my family who has handed me the gift of flexible time and relative freedom to work on my creative pursuits, despite the echo of an empty bank account that goes with them. 

I owe it to them to face the empty pages head-on, to pull the right words out of my dreamy head and arrange them on the page the best I can, instead of just chasing them around in that dreamland of my imagination.

And I owe it to myself, because this isn't a pretty knick-knack you place on a shelf and admire, but the kind of gift you try to use up, the kind that won't last forever.

It's a gift I've wished for for so long that I've been hesitant to open it, as if I feared the beautiful thing inside wouldn't fit me.

I've wasted time fiddling with the ribbons, but not any more. This week I'm ripping into it, no longer worried about whether it will fit, but determined to make it my own.

I'm adding structure to my dreamland. No more vague boundaries between projects... I'm keeping track of my time, submerging myself in one venture at a time as much as possible, finding a balance between creative and business. 

No more multi-tasking, but pure focus on whatever I'm working on.

I've stepped back into my children's book; it's the closest to being finished and it just makes more sense to dress it up, slick back its cowlick,  and ship it off to a potential agent or two... and then get back to my historical fiction, where the research has become a bog, slowing my progress.

Besides... I missed my characters (Winston, Eddie, Reed and Nate) and felt guilty that I just left them hanging, poor kids. I could hear them calling my name every once in awhile, but like a busy mother told them, Not now. Go play.

I think they've forgiven me for neglecting them. They were a little stingy with the story yesterday, but today seemed to forget they were mad.... we had a pretty exciting morning!

I haven't forgotten my personal history business, but it's like a model plane I began building but had to set aside, without its wings.

This afternoon I spent a few hours transcribing those interviews with my parents from the summer. I love listening to their voices, hearing stories I've never heard, imagining them in their other lives, those aside from being Mama and Daddy.

It takes time, but to me, it's worth it. Their stories are a treasured gift to myself. I need to get this plane off the ground and help others discover the same treasure... the treasure of family stories. So a block of my day, or at least my week, is devoted to it, too.

I'm able to do all of this during the week before Christmas because TG and Daniel helped me decorate the house and tree. My cards are ordered - they'll go out after Christmas, but that's okay - the Christmas season runs into January. The Epiphany.

We have a "no-bought-gift" policy this year, so no frantic last minute shopping for me. The next couple of nights will find me baking cookies, editing and scanning and uploading photos... those are my gifts this year, gifts of my time and cooking and photography, but not I'm stressing or keeping tabs about what doesn't get done.

Why didn't we do this earlier? Somewhere along the way I feel we lost the point of our celebration... the birth of Jesus. 

On the phone with my oldest earlier this week, discussing our Christmas plans, I asked how he felt about not exchanging gifts this year. That triggered a near-rant that made my mother's heart soar, about the over-commercialization of Christmas and extreme emphasis on bought gifts. 

"I think Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday now... it's all about family and just hanging out with each other. I think that's how Christmas should be, too," he told me.

This isn't a drastic change in attitude for him - even when he was small he didn't ask for much, and when he was older, he scolded me for buying him things he didn't need.

The other two are the same way. I have no idea where their pragmatic, frugal outlook came from - I was a zealous 'gotta have lots under the tree' kind of mom for years and Tom's not much better - but I'm very grateful for their attitude now. Perhaps they just rubbed off on me. 

Those three are my best gifts ever.

Another gift... Tom's Pop is out of the hospital. Still no definite answers till test results arrive next week, though, so we appreciate your continued prayers!

 

 

 

A Birthday, a Graduation and Texas Heaven...

We let Max sleep inside the past two nights. Belle, too, of course, although it was more for Max's sake than hers. They have a large dog house, nestled up against the house and the hill, protected from the elements, but even though temperatures were just in the low forties Sunday night, it was bone-chilling damp and he's an old dog with sore joints.

So I found an old comforter and Daniel spread it in on the floor of the laundry room. Comfy cozy and warm.

Then yesterday morning I discovered Max isn't the only one with old achy, slow-moving bones and joints. The winter chill seems to be affecting my computer, too! (You thought I was going to say it was me, didn't you?)

Tom asked me to scan and email him some documents for our health insurance... would you believe it took me over 40 minutes to scan three photos!

Forty minutes to scan 3 photos!!

My old computer was moving so slow I knew I had to do something, so instead of finishing up the editing of my last photo shoot, as I'd planned, plus catching up on my blog reading, blog writing, book writing, personal history transcribing, etc. etc, I went down the list of installed programs, files and folders with a virtual pair of scissors, Googling the ones I wasn't sure about and getting rid of everything I didn't absolutely need.

Six hours and a couple of defrags later, I gained 3% of my free space back. It was still as slow as ever, but I still felt like I had accomplished something, like that feeling you get when you finally clean out your kitchen junk drawer.

You know, if you keep a computer long enough, and your entire family uses it, it essentially does resemble a junk drawer or storage closet... a repository of all kinds of odds and ends no one needs or uses anymore.

Anyway, I also finished up the editing of my last photo shoot and emailed them to my friend/client so she could get her Christmas cards ordered, although I had to stay up really late to finish it. It was worth it just to help her out... and also for that awesome feeling of finishing something!

It's a rare thing for me; I hope to get more acquainted with it!

The only thing I accomplished this past weekend was spending lots of time with friends and family... even though it means I'm behind on everything else, it was another awesome feeling! 

First came the celebration of my first baby Tommy's 26th birthday. It was just like his birthday parties in the old days: lots of pizza... ice cream cake... singing Happy Birthday off-key... kids sleeping over, staying up all night playing video games and watching movies...

...except this time the "kids" were drinking wine and beer, not just soda. My how time flies!

Me and my sweet boy.

After working at the Bistro Saturday, I rushed home, changed clothes and met Daniel and Tom downtown for Daniel's friend Austin's graduation from UT...

Here, let me zoom in a little more.

See how happy he is?

Afterwards, we joined Austin's parents and some of the boys' friends at Asti (above) for a scrumptious Italian dinner. We arrived a little early, so I filled the time strolling down the street, snapping photos.

Look, someone knitted scarfs for the street posts! (To see more of these scarves, plus other night street scenes, go HERE.)

 

 

Sunday night Tom and I went to our church Christmas party. I look forward to it every year... we get yummy Rudy's Bar-B-Q and a wide open dance floor.

My idea of Texas heaven!

With the busy weekend, I neglected to check and charge my camera battery before we left. Of course it died before I could get any photos of the great dancers, but I did manage to get this one.

I want one of these shirts!

I smudged their name tags to protect the innocent. (You're welcome, Joan and Sherry!)

It was a wonderful weekend, and I think I appreciated it even more because through it all I was praying for a friend who underwent surgery for cancer on Friday, a friend who lost his mother on Saturday, a high school classmate who died on Friday, and fellow parishioners who rushed from the Christmas party Sunday evening when they got word their house was on fire. It burned to the ground; they didn't just lose all of their belongings, but also their dog. Just breaks my heart. Please say a prayer for each of them.

So I hope you had a wonderful weekend, too... but mostly I hope you didn't take a single second of it for granted. 

26 Sweets (and then some)

 

I was 26.

I had felt the life inside of me, kicking my ribs, pressing on my bladder. Had heard the amplified swoosh swoosh of the heartbeat in the doctor's office. Had spent all night and most of the morning gritting my teeth and breathing heh-heh-heh through the waves of pain.

And then, there you were. My baby boy. 

They wrapped you in blue blankets, covered your head to keep it warm, and placed you in my nervous arms. 

I'd never held a baby this small before. Never even changed a diaper. How could I be a mother? What if I hurt you? The feeling swelled up from deep inside... I would die if anything happened to you. The strength of that thought overwhelmed me. The truth of it rang in my heart, through my bones and every pore of my body.

Your tiny face, so close to mine. Eyes tinted blue, bottomless pools that gazed into mine, full of all the wisdom of the world. I fell into those eyes, felt the miracle and mystery of life, all God-doubts forgotten. I was forever changed. 

Happy 26th birthday, Tommy! Meeting you and watching you grow into the man you've become has been one of the sweetest adventures of my life! 

And now for a few sweet moments from the past week...

Sunday: weddings and cake balls; a clear night sky full of stars; the glow of porch light when you get home late at night

Monday: warm jackets on frosty autumn mornings; working at home so you can take drum-playing breaks

Tuesday: your old puppy well enough, not only just to walk, but to run a little and play with his little sister; a church busy with helping hands

Wednesday: a fire in the woodburning stove on a cold morning; a few seconds in a clearing in the woods, just breathing; witnessing the Holy Spirit at work; news that your father-in-law is better and out of the hospital

Thursday: a card in the mail from a friend, just because it made her think of you; editing photos on your son's faster computer and larger monitor

Friday: sitting on the back porch, sipping coffee, watching waves of misty rain parade past; good news on a friend's major surgery; singing happy birthday to your son and thinking of all of the other birthdays gone by; a house full of twenty-somethings

Saturday: a house full of twenty-somethings; chatting with your oldest on the morning of his 26th birthday, wishing him happy birthday face-to-face

Hope you all have had a week full of sweet! moments, too!

And Tommy, I'm hoping 26 is as sweet for you as it was for me!

 

Ssssh! Don't Tell my Mom! (plus the Shutterfly winners)

Life has gotten crazy busy.

My oldest son and his girlfriend are heading here this evening, joined by a few of his 'old' college buddies who are driving in from Dallas. Tomorrow is his birthday and he's letting me celebrate it with him for the first time in years and years... well, since he left home for college. It will be a late night celebration, and simple. Just pizza and ice cream cake. But it will warm my heart getting to see him (briefly) on his actual birthday tomorrow.

However, come to think of it, it might only be his sleeping 26-year-old face I get to see; I have to leave for work relatively early and they'll probably stay up late tonight, which means they'll sleep in before heading out for another celebration downtown tomorrow night.

But I'll take what I can get and be grateful!

So... today I'm cleaning house. Not just a room here or there, but the whole dang thing, top to bottom. As soon as I finish with my writing duties, I'm going to put something energetic and old (like me) on the stereo... something like KC and the Sunshine Band or James Brown or Elvis... and become a dancing, singing, cleaning, whirling dervish.

I'm hoping to finish in time to drop in on a Christmas Bunco party tonight and visit with women I never get to see anymore before running back home to greet my oldest baby. Then there's work at the Bistro, a college graduation and more Christmas parties on this week's calendar, plus decorations and cards and photo editing and writing assignments hovering over my head. 

Which means something's gotta give, and as usual, it's sleep... enough that those little dark circles are appearing under my eyes.  I've also missed a couple of workouts this week because of extra jobs that popped up, blessings I can't turn down.

But please don't tell my mom - she'll worry. And don't tell my kids - I'm always nagging them to make sure they get enough sleep. Oh, they'd love to throw this back on me!

One thing I'm not cutting out - not yet, anyway - is my morning walk. Before it was even light this morning, Belle appeared at the window next to my computer, begging to get started. Max stood a few steps behind her... a black patch on the dark porch... and that was unusual; he usually lets her do the begging alone, happy to relax in his bed on the front porch until I step out the door.

I could hear the rain hitting the roof. I guess they were as relieved and excited by the steady, light rain as I was... and I was glad they were eager for a walk. Cool, rainy days are the most beautiful when you're out in them, wrapped in a warm jacket and protected from total drenching by an umbrella. Colors deepen - greens, browns, golds, rusts - and everything glistens, bedazzled in crystal drops. 

No photographs. It was too wet to risk my camera. Belle's begging at the window again now, though, and the rain has stopped. Perhaps I'll wander out with my camera before I get busy cleaning and capture some of the rain bling...

But then... that's why my house is so dirty. All those, "But first..."s.

Ah, well. I'll just go ahead and share a couple I took the last time it rained and get busy cleaning...

And now, I won't drag it out any longer. Here are the winners of the Shutterfly card giveaway... 

Congratulations to Hilary at The Smitten Image, Gail at Louisiana Belle and Walker at A Woman's Page! I'll send you each the codes for your free 25 cards!

I wish everyone who entered could have won. I really hate leaving people out and I loved hearing all of your sweet! moments. Thanks for sharing them!

 

Returning to Me

With the birth of my first child, my ego, dreams, and most other aspects of Me as I knew Me sloughed off like a snake skin, forgotten. I was a Mother now! That tiny little being depended on me and by golly, that's all that mattered.

Within a few years, I had two more little beings depending on me. Throughout my thirties and most of my forties, I was just Mom. Busy, practical and unselfish.

Oh, I toyed with my old dreams. Took a few classes at the community college. Had some essays published. Met my girlfriends for dinner and a movie every once in a while. Worked some part-time jobs.

For years I held onto enough ego to battle my body over the same 15 pounds, but when semi-daily walks with my dogs, periodic lifting of light weights and eating healthy-ish didn't make a difference, I finally gave up and accepted my body as it was.

I was way too mature and sensible to care that the varicose veins on my right leg were so bad a new friend asked if I'd been in a car wreck, thinking they were horrible scars. I cringed a bit myself when I looked at them, but I hated to be so vain and selfish as to undergo the pain and expense of surgery. There were so many other things we needed.

Then my oldest son left for college.

Oh, my heart ached! For days I would suddenly burst into tears over the pain; it hurt so badly! One day I realized my tears weren't falling just because I missed my son; that's what triggered them, but my tears fell because I could suddenly feel Life, as I knew it, changing. Soon, my two youngest would follow their big brother out of the nest.

I would always be a mother, but I knew the end of my days as Mom was just a few years away. It made me feel...old. And I wondered, if I'm not Mom anymore, what will I be? Who will I be?

Some might call what happened next a case of the MidLife Crazies. I just call it Returning to Me.

You can be anything you want to be. I had told my kids that over and over because I believed it, and now was my chance to act on it. I would be Me. The best Me possible, for as long as possible. I wasn't ready to be old.

I took bits from each of my previous selves: the spoiled youngest child, the tomboy, the homecoming queen, the scholar, the thinker, the independent woman, the dancer, the newlywed, the mother, the daughter, friend, the volunteer, the writer, the photographer, and even, thanks to my husband, the wanna-be drummer.

Dusting off my dreams, I signed up for college classes, one per semester. Over the next few years, I started a blog and began teaching myself digital photography. I wrote a screenplay, polished up one book, and started another.

I reconnected with friends, other women who were going through the same changes I was experiencing, including friends I'd known since childhood, before any of us were wives or mothers. They helped me rediscover the Me I was back then.

I made my own health a priority, scheduling time every day for a workout. I began running again for the first time in years. Part of my motivation was ego, I admit, but I knew others still depended on me; I needed to be in the best shape possible so I could take care of them. Heart disease runs in my family. I wanted to be a good example to my kids, who carry the same genes.

My hair was thinning at an alarming rate, so I educated myself about nutrition and made huge changes in my diet. It didn't have any affect on my hair, but between those changes and my stepped-up physical work-outs, I finally dropped those 15 pounds I'd given up on. What a great surprise!

With my ego fully out of the closet, I treated myself to varicose vein surgery for my 47th birthday, deciding I was too young to wear nothing but ankle-length dresses the rest of my life.

All of these changes acted as defensive armor just in the nick of time, preparing me for the assault of menopause. I've experienced a few hot flashes, but not the mood swings, weight gain, severe sweats, or disrupted sleep some of my friends complain about.

My kids have all flown the nest now; but instead of crying, I feel like I'm flying with them.

The people at Pfizer are interested in helping all of us find our wings and keep flying through these strange, trying, wonderful midlife years and hope to accomplish that through their "Return to You" program, a program aimed at helping women return to their best selves.

Have YOU had a Return to You moment? Please share it with me in the comments; I'd love to hear your story!

Visit the Pfizer Return to You page on BlogHer.com for more blogger stories and prepare to be inspired!

Simplify! (and my Saturday Sweet Report)

"Simplify, organize, simplify..." a small voice has been chanting in my head lately, making it difficult to concentrate.

So when my friend Gwen invited me to add some of my things to her garage sale this weekend, I jumped on the chance to de-clutter.

By yesterday morning, my car was loaded with two large boxes for the garage sale - one of clothes and another of junk like lampshades, 90's jewelry, steam hair rollers and clocks. 

On my way to Gwen's I would be passing a Half Price Books store, so I also loaded up two boxes of textbooks we've been hoarding for some insane reason... some were from my brief engineering student days, for goodness' sake, relics of the dark ages when a pocket calculator cost hundreds of dollars and a computer filled an entire room.

Someone please tell me why I thought I should save those?

Half Price gave me $9 and an offer to recycle the ones they didn't want (probably my college books!) Thank you and good riddance!

Unfortunately, those boxes didn't make a dent in the junk inventory. For the next few weeks, I foresee an internal battle between my alter egos (the collector/hoarder and the zealous tosser/organizer) over what to toss and what to keep. Please wish me luck! The zealous/organizer is responsible for throwing away my journals from 3rd grade all through high school. She's dangerous!

So please also wish me a clean, organized, but interesting and eclectic decor, with no lingering regrets!

And now for my Saturday Sweet Report... 

Saturday: celebrating your mother's 80th birthday; your toddler niece reaching out to you for a cuddle

Sunday: wishing your Mama a happy 80th birthday in person; your Daddy's bacon and biscuits for breakfast; baby squirrels taking peanuts straight from your son's hand; your mom in a sombrero; a son who is addicted to books, just like you are; your oldest running his first marathon

 

Monday: an Indian summer morning; getting paid to write

Tuesday: a good soaking rain; photography friends who give advice and tips; Google, when you're learning something new and can't afford a class; people who make free tutorials

 

Wednesday: sunshine in the morning after a rainy day; a surprise visit from a friend; meeting a writing deadline; a call from your youngest; a POTW from Hilary!; a husband who shops and cooks so you can keep working on your dreams 

Thursday: the sound of a woodpecker filtering through the trees; finally sending the Cd of photos from your first shoot off to your client; bumping into a neighbor at the post office; an afternoon walk through the woods with your puppies

 

Friday: a happy photography client; lunch with girlfriends; ridding your house of two boxes of old textbooks, one box of clothes and another one of junk; visiting with three generations of beautiful blondes; lace and velvet Christmas dresses, in size 3Toddler 

Saturday: a friend who lets you put things in her garage sale even though you can't help work it; autumn leaves falling on the road in front of you; helping break a sales record where you work; sitting down after a long day on your feet; making $30 on things you would have tossed away; a movie that makes you both smile and cry at the end

 

Hope you've collected plenty of Sweet!s, too!

 

 

"The Best Laid Schemes..." (What happened to Monday and Tuesday?)

According to my calendar, I'm in Galveston right now, visiting my friend Ann, finally getting to see the cute little Victorian house she's fixing up and browsing through some wonderful eclectic shops.

Things don't always go according to plan, though, do they?

Instead of strolling the tourist-free beaches and staying up late talking and laughing with my dear friend, I've spent the past two days glued to this old computer, spending hours and hours on projects that should have only taken half the time.

(I'm beginning to wonder if shoveling coal into it might make it go any faster. I don't think it could hurt!)

Ann's free days evaporated, too, anyway, complicated by family schedules. We're going to try again in the next month or two. Why are our lives still so complicated?

I'm grateful for the work that's keeping me glued to the computer, though. One is a photo shoot from a couple of weeks ago that forced me to learn Lightoom. I'm by no means an expert, but I've learned so much, thanks to tutorials and photography friends (thank you, Beth!) and learning something new is so much fun! (And frustrating. And agonizing.)

Unfortunately, one thing I've learned is that my E: drive on my computer has gone kaputz. Nothing like a few hurdles in your path to keep you on your toes, right?

The second project was a review for BlogHer with a quick turnaround, as in, I learned about it yesterday and the deadline was this morning. And I (pretty much) turned it in on time. Ahem.

It wasn't a typical product review... more of a personal essay on health and aging and menopause, so I was happy I was chosen for the project.

I can't believe it's already Wednesday, though. Here are a few highlights from the past few days...

 

My mother turned 80! Middle-son Daniel went with me for the celebration at my parents' house. I enjoy road trips with Daniel - he helps me find good radio stations and doesn't mind me singing along loudly, even when I don't really know the words. 

It was a quick visit with family, highlighted by fried Gulf shrimp, birthday cake, breakfast by Daddy, plenty of coffee, Mexican food, and my mother in a birthday sombrero... 

...which matches this one of my dad from last month...

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Oldest-son Tommy ran his first full marathon! If you knew all the nights I stayed up with him while he struggled to breathe with his asthma, you'd really understand how very proud I am! And how relieved I was that he crossed that line, safe and sound and breathing!

This photo was snapped by his sweetheart, Kirby. She completed her second half-marathon that day. 

Yay, Tommy and Kirby!

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I won a blog drawing!! This cute cup featuring a 'doodle' by Cyndee at Eloise's Collage arrived in my mailbox Friday. I love it! Thank you, Cyndee! 

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Remember the Thanksgiving Comes First campaign? Thanks to Suldog, I found out about a petition to "Tell Target to Save Thanksgiving". If you want to add your name, click HERE.

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It rained yesterday! I mean, really and truly rained!

Well, not enough to capture a photo of the actual rain, but I did get one this morning of a dew-covered wildflower...

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Last but not least, Hilary at the Smitten Image awarded me a Post of the Week for As if I were beside you... Thank you, Hilary!

(Click the icon below to go read the other POTW and see her wonderful photography.)

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I hope you're having a wonderful week, even if your plans went agley like mine!

(At least I wasn't left with "nought but grief an' pain"...)

 

...The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft agley,
An' lea'e us nought but grief an' pain,
For promis'd joy!

~from To a Mouse by Robert Burnes

The Chase (and this week's Sweet!s)

There I was, walking along with my puppies on our dirt road yesterday morning, the sun just barely peeking into the Hollow, when suddenly Max and Belle caught a whiff of something exciting and took off in a full run.

I thought they would stop after a few yards as they usually do, but to my surprise, they continued running all the way around the next curve, disappearing out of sight, leaving me all alone. 

I just kept plodding along, expecting to see them come trotting back to me any minute, so when I heard movement in the woods to my right a few minutes later, I assumed it was my puppies. 

But then I heard movement again, just a few seconds later in the same area. Through the trees I caught a glimpse of a deer, closely followed by Belle and Max, heading back toward the house.

Max, old man that he is... well, I expected he would just head on home after such lengthy runs. He'd be worn out!

It was a beautiful morning, though, so I decided to keep walking as far as the curve, as usual, and then head home. No reason why I should call my walk short!

Next thing I know, there's a crashing sound from the woods ahead of me and, one after another, deer popped out, dashing across the road.

And then... I couldn't believe it... out popped Max and Belle, still on their heels. Max was still running!

They all disappeared into the woods on my left. I kept walking but wondered where they might appear next!

Belle returned first. It was a few minutes before Max emerged from the woods... mouth foaming, a rust-colored leaf hanging from a bit of drool from his mouth, but obviously very pleased with himself. 

It was a good morning.

 

And now for the rest of the Sweet! moments of my week....

Friday: watching your friends' son play the drums in public; dancing; staying up late, eating peanuts, catching up with friends

Saturday: pancakes and bacon; talking 'cat' with Nala; garage sales and antique stores with your husband and friends; Shari's taco soup; watching home movies; the sound of the wind through tall pines, like rushing water

Sunday: sitting on a back porch, listening to crows and other birds, sipping coffee and chatting with your friend; breakfast tacos; walking along the river, being silly; exploring old barns

Monday: your son's first day at a new job in a new town, the answer to his prayers; working on your book; rain after a drought; a 30-day free trial of Lightroom; meeting friends at a Junior Forum Christmas show; Victorian houses

Tuesday: playing the drums; learning Lightroom; voting; two days in a row of rain; getting to bed before 11pm

Wednesday: sunshine and a brisk wind on your morning walk; Belle running and running and running; Daughtry singing on the Today Show while you're on the elliptical; finding free presets for Lightroom; a call from your oldest, reporting that he loves his new job

Thursday: the full moon resting on silhouetted treetops; a morning photo shoot with a red-tailed hawk; lunch with friends; discussing family history with your son; remembering to snap the full moon

Friday: having your camera in hand when a herd of startled deer cross the road right in front of you; watching your old dog run and run and run

Saturday: an orange dawn; a road trip with your son; helping your mom celebrate her 80th birthday

Yes, I'm headed out to see my mom today. Tomorrow is her 80th birthday and most of us will be gathering this evening to help her celebrate. That will be the sweetest moment of my week, I'm sure!

My oldest can't be there - he's running his first marathon this weekend. I'm so proud of him!

Hope you've had a week full of Sweet! moments and the next one is even sweeter!

First Days

Looking sharp in "business casual", he tucked his lunch into his backpack and headed out the door with Tom this morning before dawn. It's Daniel's first day at his post-college-graduation, adult-world job. He and Tom are carpooling right now until Daniel gets his own place in town.

I stood there watching him as he grabbed a banana and a couple of oranges from bowls on the kitchen island. He sported a new shirt, slacks and shoes... so reminiscent of other "first days" when he wore his favorite set of new school clothes and a clutched a superhero-decorated lunchbox free of crumbs and grime. I almost grabbed my camera to capture the image of him standing by the front door, backpack slung over his shoulder, like I always did in those days that don't seem that long ago...

...But I held back. I'm not sure why. There seemed to be a line I would be crossing, a line that appears once your baby birds have tested their wings and learned they're capable of flying on their own. It's a wavery line, though, hard to see at times and I'm sure I step over it occasionally, purely out of old habit. But I'm getting better at spotting it and staying on my side.

I think I am, anyway.

Daniel plans to look for his own place soon. That makes me happy and sad, all at the same time. Happy because it's the way it should be. Sad because I enjoy having him around, of course. 

Happy and sad... a mother's braid of feelings she wears most of her life when it comes to her children.

I don't take it personally that he's eager to move out. Lord knows, living with me and Tom would drive anyone nuts, but I think it has more to do with this: 

He's 23... his wings are more than capable of flying where ever he wishes to go...

Life, according to an Arabic proverb, is composed of two parts: that which is past - a dream; and that which is to come - a wish. ~ G.A. Sala

(I didn't have one from today, so I'm posting this one... his first day of kindergarten. It took awhile, but all that education has finally paid off. I bet I still have that lunchbox somewhere...)

Anyway, I hope this is the best first day ever, Daniel!

 

 

When the Circus Leaves Town (and my week of Sweet!s)

Last night Tom and I split a Subway sandwich for dinner, sitting on the restaurant's deck overlooking what used to be an arm of Lake Travis. Car tracks were visible, cutting right down the middle of the dry, grassy lake bed.

Wanting a closer look, we headed to a nearby park, but we were distracted from our lake quest by a wide field dotted with campers, trailers and trucks. A red one in the middle caught our eye, boasting "Culpepper and Merriweather Circus" in large, white old-fashioned lettering across its paneled side.

Nearby, a few men worked as a team rolling up what we guessed to be the performance tent. Two horses - one "regular" and one "mini" - were tethered near a trailer. Some people walked dogs near another trailer carrying rows of auditiorium-style seating, collapsed and waiting for the next town... the next show. 

I wondered about their lives, how it must be to live on the road, going from one small town to the next. Watching them pack it all up like that was sweet and sad, all at the same time.

(Wouldn't you know, for once I didn't have my camera? I had even left my phone at home!)

 

And now for a few more of my sweet! moments from the past week... 

Sunday: hearing just the words you need to hear at church; encouraging words (and donations) from friends supporting your writing; memories of your big brother

Monday: easily untangling business and computer knots from the night before; morning mist on the hills; taking a baby step forward on your personal history business; listening to your mother's voice telling stories of her life; tips from photographer friends; receiving a text from your middle son that says "I got the job!"

Tuesday: walking early enough to greet the first orange rays of the sun; a rowdy wind playing with your hair; learning new photography tricks from a friend

Wednesday: riding in a truck with the windows rolled down; hearing the caw of a crow and watching it swoop out of the woods and across the road; laughing with your son over snippets of "Community" on Hulu

Thursday: meeting friends for lunch and making plans to do it every week; following the tap-tap-tap of a woodpecker until you find it behind a screen of oak leaves (and getting a few blurry photographs of it); meeting a deadline; chicken and mushroom pizza

Friday: working out to Elvis's "Number 1 Hits" CD; Belle's face peering in the window beside you, reminding you to take breaks from the computer screen to sit on the back step and cuddle with her; a husband who says "That's okay." when you tell him you're not going to make it to the grocery store today (again!); a son who offers to run to the small grocery store for a few things in the meantime; finally finishing your TABC certification; encouraging comments from strangers

Saturday: evening light on a vineyard; splitting a Subway sandwich with your sweetie on a deck as the sun begins to set; taking a walk along the bottom of a dry lake (sweet in the unique-ness... sad in the reality); watching a traveling circus roll up their tents, preparing to head to the next town

Sunday: late Mass (sleeping in!); a phone call from a dear friend you don't talk to often enough; looking forward to an afternoon with your daughter

I also have one belated Sweet! - I can finally announce that my oldest son got the job he was hoping for. Talk about an answered prayer! I couldn't mention it here until he gave notice at his current job. He and his girlfriend will finally live in the same town for the first time in their five-year relationship. 

I hope you've had a week full of sweet! moments!I've found that, even on the toughest days, if I look really close and think hard about it, I can find at least one. And even just one is a flash of bright light in the gray.

What was a Sweet! moment in your week?

(I know you can think of at least one!)

 

 

Time to Celebrate!!

Why is Tom so happy?

a. he won a million dollars!

b. my book is getting published!

c. middle son, recent-college-grad Daniel got a job!

(Scroll down to see the answer...)

(Scroll...)

(Scroll...)

(Scroll...)

(A little more...)                                                

(Okay, STOP!)

Did you guess "c"? You're absolutely right! He thought he did a good job at the interview last week, and it looks like he was right! YAY!

(I threw "a" and "b" in there just to dream a little bit... Maybe one day!)

But, believe me, "c" is awesome and we're tossing our hats in the air!!

Congratulations, Daniel!!

(Two down, one to go...)

Full disclosure: this photo is from New Year's Eve. We haven't actually thrown a party in honor of Daniel's new job... But we should, shouldn't we?? Whoo-hoo!!!

 

Twenty-Three? How is that possible?

"Daniel, you're going to be 23 in two days!"

"Yeah, I know, mom."

Whoa. That thought hit me while we were driving back from town two days ago. There I was, comfortably cruising along with him being 22, and next thing I knew, a whole year had zoomed by, just a blur out my window, it moved so fast.

And now here we are on October 13, the day 23 years ago that I first laid eyes on this amazing kid... um, man... oh, gosh, what do you call your kids when they get to be so old?

...love at first sight...

...I swear this was yesterday and not two decades ago...

This will be the first birthday in several years I'll get to see him on his actual birthday, since he's back living at home.

I know it's not where he hoped to be on his 23rd birthday, but he's got such a great attitude about it, teaching me by example about hope, optimism and 'chill'. 

He's been spoiling me and Tom while he's here... loading the dishwasher, taking out the trash without being asked, feeding and walking the dogs, cooking dinner, helping Tom with jobs around the property, watching movies with us... whatever we ask him to do, he jumps on it, eager to help.  He even seems to enjoy being with us! Most of the time, anyway.

Tom and I got used to that really quick. I feel blessed having this extra time with him, not because he's so helpful (although that's a definite plus!) but because he's just a great kid man guy (there, that sounds right)... so funny and smart, as well as thoughtful. (I've already written tons about how great he is HERE and HERE and HERE and HERE if you don't believe me.) 

So today I'll make sure I don't ask him to do anything. I'll try to go back to my old ways and spoil him by cooking him breakfast (he's sleeping in for a change... one advantage of not having a job yet!), fixing the King Ranch Casserole he requested (after dozens of "What do you want for your birthday?" pleas from me) and the Cyclops cookies he didn't request but I know he loves.

(Why is it mothering always revolves around food, especially when our babies get older?)

So Happy 23rd birthday, Daniel.

May you have clear paths and bright skies.

And no matter what this year brings,

I hope you continue to "Be silly. Be honest. Be kind."  

(Ralph Waldo Emerson)

Also... Happy birthday wishes to Kim, my sweet previously-Montana-now-Arizona sister-in-law... young cousins Ashley, Kayce and Kayce's daughter, Tayvie (celebrating her first birthday!)... and Pete, my inspirational blogging friend, who wrote a wonderful, reflective piece today in honor of his birthday (go here to read it - it's great!) 

 

A Top Notch Day

It started like this...

Belle's face peered in from the pre-dawn darkness, much earlier than usual. I had just stumbled from the bedroom, still groggy with sleep.

She seemed nervous about something. Stepping outside, I knew right away what had her up so early, wanting our company...

...The frogs had a croaking chorus coming from the pond, so loud I knew the full moon could hear it through the misty clouds. Belle had probably forgotten what that sound was, it had been so long since there was enough water in the pond to make the the frogs sing.

I reassured her and stepped back inside. Thirty minutes later, when she was still peering in at me, I gave in and stepped back outside to rub her ears, and this is what I saw...

 

I knew it would be a good day.

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Daniel had an interview downtown. I tagged along to visit the State Library.

It had been ten years since I'd done any research there... it was completely changed! Bigger, more modern... and even a snack room for patrons now. (In the 'old' days, my co-genealogy-nut friends Susan and Donna and I would stand on the steps and eat our lunches.) I caught on to the new microfilm readers, thanks to a lesson from the sweet girl working the Library, and even found a few tidbits on 1880's taxrolls. (Are you yawning yet?)

Something that hasn't changed is our beautiful Capitol building, just across the street from the State Library and Archives building. 

 

 

A scent captured my nose, sending me whirling back into my childhood and memories of catching honeybees in glass jars (released soon afterward, don't worry.)

 

 

Japanese Ligustrum... complete with bees. Too bad I didn't have a glass jar with me! (I took more photos around the capitol - you can see them HERE.)

After Daniel's interview, he introduced me to this Austin icon, used in the movie, Dazed and Confused...

 

 

We both ordered fried chicken and it was, indeed, Top Notch!

But the best part came after we got home and took the puppies for a walk. After just one day of rain, the pond has water again! It might not look like much to you, but it's beautiful to me!

 

The air hummed with dragonflies. Where have they been hiding? They flew too fast to capture their photos, but across the pond, I came across this splash of color, such a welcome sight after months of gray and brown...

 

 

As if all that wasn't enough, this is how the day is ending...

 

 

Hope your day was Top Notch, too!

Sweet Reflections on a Sunday Morning

Dear God,

Thank you for this day, for letting me wake in Mam-ma's room, surrounded by so many sweet memories. Thank you for the sounds of Daddy, moving around the kitchen, and the rumbling thunder outside, a promise of rain on this parched land.

Thank you for this time with my Mama and Daddy, and with my kids, all three of them stll nestled in beds that have cushioned them most of their lives, in bedrooms from my childhood. Please help me be a blessing to them all.

Please watch over us as we head home today... 

It's raining, although not as much as Daddy would like, so he's grumbling a little. He's in the kitchen, rustling up some breakfast for Mama, who is now up and helping keep the squirrels in peanuts. I just missed a great shot of a dove and the kids are still sleeping. They were up longer than the rest of us, the sounds of their mingled laughter drifting in to me as I fell asleep.

It's a beautiful Sunday.  

 

Sunday: a pre-dawn horizon glowing red above the water; walking on the beach, witnessing the sun rising above the waves; tagging along on a photo-staging with your new artist friend; hitting a "Penny" sale... buy one, get one for a penny... with your girlfriends; home safe and sound from a wonderful weekend; grilled pork loin a la Tom; tagging along on your boys' trip to Europe via photos posted on Facebook; reading a letter written by your great-great-great-great-grandfather to his brother in France, written in 1810, that answers so many questions about your family history

Monday: glimpsing Belle's face peering in at me through the French doors before dawn has even softened the darkness of night; a morning walk with my puppies (I missed them!); eagerly wondering what new door God is planning to open for me now that another one is shutting - and realizing the thought was automatic, not just a way to cheer myself up; hearing (with relief) from your doctor what you already suspected... that the lump in your breast is just a result of your out-of-control coffee addiction; sitting in your car chatting with your daughter, catching up on the latest in her life, then having dinner with your middle son AND getting a phone call from your oldest

Tuesday: needing a light jacket on your morning walk; sunlight kissing the top branches of the trees; the joy in a running dog's face; a whole day at home to work on your projects, including your book for the first time in weeks; a call from a friend letting you know she'll be in town on Friday (time for a get-together!); sitting in a rocker on the front porch reading, a puppy dog at your feet; a new episode of "Glee" 

Wednesday: working on your book two days in a row; tons of information for your book from your cousin in your email inbox; news that your recently graduated son got called for a job interview

Thursday: meeting a deadline on your book review; reflecting on an inspiring life; writing, writing, writing

Friday: wishing your father a happy 85th birthday; reciprocating a favor by helping to take care of friends' dogs; a glass of wine on the back deck with a sweet friend; dinner and some dancing with more dear friends at Steiner Ranch Steakhouse 

Saturday: hearing all of Peter Frampton's "Do You Feel Like We Do?" on the car radio (and singing along); all three kids under the same roof; seeing your cousin Sheryl and her husband Bill for the first time in years; celebrating your Daddy's 85th birthday with fresh seafood and German Chocolate Cake, surrounded by family; your brother-in-law going to the trouble to find something for you on eBay he knows you will really appreciate (more on that later); reading to your toddler niece; experiencing Germany's Oktoberfest through your oldest son's iPhone videos and stories; laughing with your three kids over silly SNL skits and you-tube vids

Sunday: squirrels peering in at sliding doors, begging for peanuts; helping your daddy find information on Drop Foot on the internet and (maybe) convincing him to get the brace the doctor suggested since it's still bothering him; the sound of rain and thunder all around the house, enough that your Daddy finally admits it's raining

Here's wishing you a beautiful Sunday, with skies the color of your dreams.

A Week's Worth of Sweets

It rained today. 

For the first time in months, I heard thunder. I felt raindrops.

I was at work, busy with customers and orders and separate checks, but even though I couldn't really dance in the rain, in my mind I imagined I was. And it felt great!

Sweet!

 

Last Sunday I met friends at a Mexican food restaurant to celebrate my friend Gwen's birthday. I brought Gwen a present. Just a simple gift.

Gwen brought me 3 containers of metal and porcelain decorations, cupcake holders, and pretty plates for me to use at my parents' upcoming birthday celebrations. Gwen gave me (gave me, mind you) the sign above. She's weeding out things and thought of me when she saw it.

Sweet!

(I don't deserve my friends!)

Last night around 9pm my sons, my son's girlfriend and her cousin boarded a plane for Germany. I prayed. I calculated when they should land. This morning before work I opened Facebook and saw check-ins from Germany. 

Sweet!

Here are a few more sweet!s from the past week...

Sunday: Celebrating a friend's birthday with Mexican food and Mexican martinis; spending time with the Harvest moon; moonlight on a metal roof; looking at the full moon through binoculars with your son

Monday: kneeling and praying in an "empty" church, just you and God; conversations with blog friends, dreaming about wish-list cameras and lenses; your son cooking dinner; an email from a sweet friend you haven't heard from in awhile

Tuesday: the full moon hanging around after sunrise, peeking out of pink clouds; dove tracks reappearing on the road; responses to your shout-out about raffle tickets benefiting a wonderful cause

Wednesday: another request for raffle tickets waiting in my inbox; chatter of mountain jays; catching orange moon just above the horizon over the vineyard; cheesecake with blueberries and raspberry sauce; the smell of chocolate torte baking

Thursday: spending the day with your son before he flies off to Germany; finally getting your camera and lenses cleaned; seeing a black widow spider and a rattlesnake up close without anyone getting hurt (!); meeting Mr. Ed (more on that later); your husband making it home safely while pulling a 20+ foot trailer loaded with 94 sheets of roofing metal 

Friday: your husband finding a wheat penny nestled in your coin purse (because you wouldn't have noticed it!); your puppy dogs being good hosts to their guest; remembering your doctor appointment before you were too, too late; gray clouds in the sky most of the day, even if they don't hold any rain for you; finding out that even though a friend recently had malaria, he's all better now

Saturday: knowing the traveling kids landed safely in Germany; time for a walk with your husband and puppies before work; thunderstorms and rain after months of drought; hearing "good job" from a co-worker

What are some of your sweet! moments from the past week? I hope you had plenty!

(Not so sweet - getting behind on emails and my Facebook people and favorite blogs again! Don't give up on me or forget me!)

Linking up with focus52's theme "bokeh"

 

September, Oktober(fest) and my Friday Favorite Photo

"By all these lovely tokens

September days are here,

With summer’s best of weather

And autumn’s best of cheer."

-   Helen Hunt Jackson, September, 1830-1885

 

Wednesday night, alone on the Bistro patio after a special banquet, I bent over to un-velcro a small cushion from one of the metal chairs. Triple digit heat had given way to a cooling breeze whispering over the vineyard. An acoustic guitar strummed a beautiful song through the outside speakers.

I turned to remove another cushion and that's when I saw it, the orange orb hovering on the horizon, smiling down on the grapevines. The beauty, the peace, they total SIGH of it all froze me in place for several moments. I could have stayed there, doing nothing but soaking it all in with all of my senses for hours.

I love September... I love full moons... so that's why I chose the one above as my favorite this week. 

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My boys are on the edge of a European adventure. They're in Chicago as I'm typing this but jumping on another plane this evening, headed for Munich to experience an authentic Oktoberfest, visit castles and all that fun German stuff.

In a few days, they'll head for Prague, Czech Republic. Another place I've longed to visit.

I'm unashamedly living vicariously through my sons the next few days just as I did with TG when she traveled to Spain a few years ago. 

A photo of them at the airport would have been my favorite photo of the week, except I wasn't there to see them off. They left early this morning from San Antonio, along with Tommy's girlfriend Kirby. We met up with her in San Marcos last night to trade Daniel for our grandpuppy, Josie. We'll be puppy-sitting for the next week or so. (Max and Belle are very excited!)

In Chicago, the trio are meeting up with Kirby's cousin Matt before taking off on the next leg of the adventure.

All I've asked for are lots of photos and, if possible, something with "Czechoslovakia" written on it. Heck, it could be a napkin for all I care, but "Czechoslovakia" has been my favorite word for as long as I can remember... it's just so much fun to say. I love the rhythm of it, the way it dances around in your mouth. Try it!!

(I can't believe they traded "Czechoslovakia" for "Czech Republic"! Not nearly as much fun, in my opinion.)

Since I don't have a photo of them, passport in hand and loaded down with luggage, and because their trip is throwing me back into my own memories (a sure sign I'm getting old, right?) I'm adding one of me with my friends Donna and Laura, on the edge of our own European adventure way back in '76. (I'm the brunette on the right.)

Under that brown hair, I truly believed this was just a preview of many European trips to come. I'm only 52 now - even though I haven't returned yet, there's still plenty of time for my brunette 17-year-old self to be right, isn't there?

But even if I never get the chance (more like, have the money), I'm so glad my kids have the travel bug and are taking advantage of the opportunity.

Please join me in praying they have a safe, fun adventure (and bring their old mom lots of photos!) Thank you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Summer Sweet and Summer Sour

Monday morning I knew autumn had arrived, riding the tail of a brisk breeze from the north that dropped temperatures nearly twenty degrees. Robe wrapped tight and relishing the chill, I sipped coffee in my pajamas rocking on the deck of a log cabin nestled in the woods above a dry creek bed.

We were at a rental lake house, guests of my oldest son's girlfriend's dad, along with his mom, his girls, their friends, my boys and Tommy's friend Ryan. It was just the change of scenery I needed after being on my feet eleven hours on Saturday and six on Sunday: fajitas, wine, a hot tub, my first game of beer pong... (Tom and I lost, of course. How could we compete against college kids?)

One of the college girls is a San Antonio Spurs Cheerleader; it took awhile but we finally convinced her to teach us part of the audition dance. ("Us" included my boys. I was one proud mom! That took guts - and resulted in lots of laughs!)

We kept one eye on the television, though. Unfortunately, the dry, brisk breeze that brought such beautiful weather also helped stir up and spread wildfires all over Central Texas Sunday afternoon.

I worried about my puppies, but my neighbors promised to let us know if the Hollow was threatened with fire danger, so before heading home we all drove to a beautiful picnic area on the banks of the Colorado River.

A rope swing beckoned. It took awhile to get up my nerve (and Tom had to mention "Bucket List") but I finally took my turn, swinging out over the river and splashing down into its cool depths.

Ah, such summer sweetness! 

It was truly a glorious day with blue skies and perfect temperatures, but driving home, seeing the towers of smoke from wildfires to our south and east, we prayed for rain instead. 

 A few hours later, I noticed the blue sky over the Hollow had turned a hazy gray. I stepped outside and the smell of smoke hit my nose. I envisioned a wall of fire just over the next hill, racing toward us. 

With a blue sky above you, it's easy to feel detached from the danger even while you pray for those affected and  worry about it coming close to you. When smoke fills the sky and your nose, detached uneasiness can flare into full-fledged panic. At least that's the way it affected me.

I searched the sky in all directions, but thank goodness no distinct columns of smoke, black or white, rose above our surrounding hills. That helped douse the panic, but I had to make sure nothing was sneaking up on us, so I grabbed my keys and drove to a nearby hill where I had a 360 view. That hazy gray smoke wafted toward us from across the lake, obscuring the horizon and washing out the blue sky, but no fires burned near us. 

Yesterday, the winds were calm. The sky above us stayed blue. I kept an eye on the horizon but no smoke drifted our way, although I knew the fires are still burning around us, both old and new. But the potential remained. I knew it could be us just as easily as it has been Bastrop, Spicewood, Steiner Ranch, Pflugerville, Leander... and what would I do if fire turned our way? 

Lists ground me, making me feel I have some control, even if it's an illusion, so I made an "Evacuation List", a reminder to me of things I need to grab if fire chases us out of our home.   

The puppies, my purse, plus some items I can fit in a backpack:  my external hard drive, my phone and charger, my camera and charger, a list of accounts and passwords, our medicine, a bottle of water...

No extra clothes or toiletries... they're replaceable. No books, family mementoes, heirloom quilts, wedding photos... I'd hate to leave them behind, potentially lose them, but they aren't crucial. 

So tell me, what's on your Evacuation List? 

Please join me in praying for the evacuees, for the firefighters and especially, for rain. Fires are also popping up near Houston. Over 3.6 million acres of Texas have burned since December - reportedly the size of Connecticut if you lump them all together.

If you would like to help the victims and firefighters, click HERE for the Central Texas Red Cross website and HERE for a list of other organizations and locations to drop donations.

Phone Calls, Heartbeats, Hugs

A call that wakes you in the morning rarely bears good news.

The call that woke me yesterday let me know a dear friend's husband had died. He had some health issues (who doesn't by the time you hit your 50's?) but nothing that warned her that a day we all dread and hope never comes would soon arrive on her doorstep.

I, in turn, began making calls and sending messages to other friends, and they then did the same... so many digital arms stretching out and surrounding our friend, embracing her in a virtual hug. It's comforting to be able to connect that way with men and women who are still just school-age boys and girls in your mind.

Most of us will come together in person on Friday for the service and we'll continue to encircle our friend afterward as long as she needs us. 

I've been wanting to head that way to see my parents, anyway, especially since Daddy's recent hospital visit, and my nephew, his wife and baby are visiting from Wyoming this week. 

I always enjoy fitting a visit with friends into my trips home, but not under these circumstances.

One friend shared a comment his father-in-law made years ago...  "when you're in your sixties, the funeral homes become your reunions with everyone." We're not yet in our sixties, but I think we've met at too many funerals already.

So if you don't mind, please say a little prayer for my friend this weekend. And while you're at it, could you pray for a bit of rain to head our way? We just passed the triple digit record - 70 (sweaty) days this summer as of today. 

Oh, and two more prayer requests. I've delivered TG and her things safely back to campus - would you say a prayer for her for a safe and successful semester... and one for her recently graduated brother to find a job?

I promise that's all (for now.)

Thank you in advance.

I'll be praying for all of the above, plus keeping the East Coast in my prayers as Hurricane Irene heads its way and I'll also give thanks the recent earthquake up there didn't do more damage.

Just too much going on, isn't there?

How do we get back to simple? Or is simple just an illusion created by our memories? Probably. If so, then I'm even more grateful for my memories. 

My Sweet and My Sweets!

On this day 29 years ago, I walked down the aisle of St. Mary's Catholic Church in League City, Texas and officially joined my life to Tom's. I hadn't even known him a full year, but I was very sure my feet were treading in the right direction.

Despite that confidence and our whole romantic fairy-tale falling-in-love story, the path hasn't always been an easy one, because, you know, we're married. It's like a three-legged sack race... to get to the finish line you have to learn to work as a team. You might travel faster by yourself, and maybe trip less, but it sure wouldn't be as much fun.

Last weekend we attended a wedding officiated by a permanent deacon of the Catholic Church, a widower who was able to give a unique spin to the ceremony and the concept of marriage. 

He spoke mostly to the new couple, but his words resonated even with the rest of us who already know that marriage can be hard, how there are going to be times you might not even like that person you married much less love them, grrr, because he helped us remember we're just a heartbeat away from being left alone with just our memories and regrets. Never take each other's presence for granted.

He warned the new couple that Life would try to come between them. I personally think the most important word in marriage, besides Love, is Cling. You have got to cling to each other with all you've got because there's so much pulling you apart or trying to squeeze in between you. Stress, lack of money, lack of sleep, kids, exhaustion, pride...

Oh, pride is a big one. Watch out for it! The deacon warned against it, too, about the dangers of keeping score on who does the most around the house, etc. (Those of you who've been married awhile know what I'm talking about!)

We need to overlook each other's faults and focus on the positives. Focus on love, because after all, the love you have for each other is just a reflection of God's love for each of you.

"My wife was a terrible housekeeper," he told us, then looking up, he said, "You know it's true! You were!" But he said if started to complain, she would look at him and say, "Do you love me?" and it would get him everytime. (Yes, he loved you. It was plain to all of us!)

He told us to kiss each other and say "I love you" every day, and he had us do it right then and there! 

By golly, I think the best thing a couple can do for their marriage is to attend a wedding every now and then, especially right before their anniversary.

Happy anniversary, sweet Tom! I love you!

Gosh, we were cute, weren't we?

 And now for the rest of my sweet! moments of the week...

Sunday: attending Mass with 2/3 of your kids; an unrushed trip to the grocery store; Tom's hot wings for dinner; catching up on South Park episodes with your son

Monday: pink clouds; capturing photos of a woodpecker; a too rare phone conversation with your mother- and father-in-law

Tuesday: watching your old dog run down a dirt road; keeping your temper despite being disconnected 6 times and being on hold for two hours with the phone company; a new lens waiting in your mailbox; a violet dusk; a call from your brother with joyful news

Wednesday: glimpse of a hummingbird out the window; a new book to review waiting in your mailbox; potentially good news from your son

Thursday: your sister's birthday!; news that your cataract is growing but not enough to affect your vision or require surgery... yet; lunch at the mall and philosophical discussions with 2/3 of your kids; Panda Express orange chicken; a surprise gift from a friend

Friday: the excitement of closing one chapter in your life and opening a new one; a roadrunner zipping in front of you then waiting while you snap its picture; writing and writing and writing on your book; a full moon over your left shoulder, casting light on the road before you.

Saturday: looking into a pair of familiar blue eyes, feeling the same rush of love you felt 29 years ago when you said "I do".

Hope you've had a week full of sweet! moments!

 

 

Detours (and my Friday Favorite Photo)

This has been one crazy, zig-zagging, bouncing, stretching-myself-across-so-many-things-I-think-I'm-going-to-pop kind of week. One of those weeks where everything is high priority and you just can't procrastinate any longer. So you just do it all, period, and try your best to get some sleep.

Things like a writing deadline, a book review deadline, a contact list to compile and a group email that had to go out, a BlogHer assignment, a Parish Council meeting, eye doctor appointments x 3 of us, my car inspected, our anniversary looming, my sister's birthday, a dozen blog posts swirling in my head waiting to be born, a new FlickR project, my refrigerator filter glowing orange, watering a friend's plants while she's out of town plus trying to keep our own alive...

Whew.

All of this on top of my two day jobs (weekday and weekend) overlapping so I have only one day off in 9 days right on the heels of a quick trip out of town to a wedding. 

I confess I didn't even think about housework of any kind this week or do more than glance at my three-page to-do list. 

If it weren't for Tom, TG and Daniel helping with cooking, laundry and whatever I ask them to do around here, I really would have popped, I'm sure.

Of course, it's not over yet. I work both days this week at the Bistro; we celebrate our anniversary tomorrow night (we're thinking dessert at Sonic at sunset); reading and writing deadlines still loom, the filter light still gives me an orange wink every time I open the fridge door, my car still isn't inspected (shhh! don't tell!), I haven't started the FlickR project, and my laundry is overflowing...

But the good news is I'll have time to take care of most of these starting Monday. The bad news is it's because one of my jobs ended, which means one of my paychecks. The good news is that means I'll have more time to focus on my book and my businesses, and I'll still be moderating the Jobs4Autism website.

I haven't decided if I've come to another detour in my life or if I'm actually stepping back onto the main road. I've taken so many detours I'm not even sure what the main road looks like anymore. Some detours were results of my own decisions; some just plopped down from no where, forcing me to veer in a new direction.

I came across this on a blog today, written by Baron Batch, a Texas Tech to Pittsburgh Steelers football player/writer:

"The funny thing about all roads is that at some point they all have potholes, speed bumps and detours. However, the durability of your vehicle is what allows you to reach your destination regardless of your traveling conditions."

Baron's post is a tribute to his faith and a reminder of the value of detours in our life. Instead of playing in his first NFL game this week, he tore his ACL. He writes...

"Trying to understand Gods plan will bring insanity, trusting it brings peace."

So much wisdom in one so young! I aspire to have that kind of faith and pray my kids do, too. I hope we all have durable vehicles! (I wish I could be confident that when my own kids face detours in their lives, when things go wrong as they always will, they hear my voice whispering, "Have faith, have faith.")

 

And now for my Friday Favorite Photo!

I picked this one of Max because...

a) it's taken with my new 50mm lens! and 

b) he's eating! 

(He stopped eating for awhile last weekend when we were gone. Got me so worried! Dang dogs.)

Now that I think of it, Max himself was a detour. We had decided we weren't going to have any more dogs. Then that starving puppy wandered up and stole our hearts...

Hope you've had a wonderful week... hope you have a great weekend...  and hope you look at the detours in your life as opportunities rather than bad luck.

Amen.

 

 

 

 

 

Shadows and Light

 

On Death
 ~Kahlil Gibran

You would know the secret of death.
But how shall you find it unless you seek it in the heart of life?
The owl whose night-bound eyes are blind unto the day cannot unveil the mystery of light.
If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life.
For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.


In the depth of your hopes and desires lies your silent knowledge of the beyond;
And like seeds dreaming beneath the snow your heart dreams of spring.
Trust the dreams, for in them is hidden the gate to eternity.
Your fear of death is but the trembling of the shepherd when he stands before the king whose hand is to be laid upon him in honour.
Is the shepherd not joyful beneath his trembling, that he shall wear the mark of the king?
Yet is he not more mindful of his trembling?


For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun?
And what is it to cease breathing, but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered?


Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.
And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.
And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance.

 

The second I became a mother, I also gave birth to the fear of losing my child.

I'm blessed that it has remained just a fear, not a reality; only an inkling of the actual pain, like dipping your toe into a cold lake versus falling completely into its frigid depths, staring up at the sunlight but unable to feel its warmth.

I realize I'm just three heartbeats away from that pain, but I've grown used to the fear. I sense it there, just around the corner, a shadow cast by the light of the living, but I don't dwell on its presence or let it control me or even worry me. What's the use? I'd rather focus on the light.

But there are times I'm reminded of its nearness, and how blessed I am that it has remained around the corner. This week has been one of them.

The deaths of our Navy Seals... the riots in London... a friend whose mother's cancer has returned, this time with no hope of another remission, only an hourglass running out of sand. 

So much sadness. Each one affected, someone's child. Someone's parent. Or sibling, lover, friend.

On Facebook a page popped up I'd forgotten about, created as a place to remember students and faculty from our high school who had passed.

I posted my class's "In Memorium" list. (At our reunions, we light a candle, then I read the list out loud, followed by a few moments of silence in memory of those we've lost.) Right away classmates popped up, reminding me of several others I needed to add. 

My heart protests that we're too young to have lost this many - too many- but my brain reminds me of our age. Ah, yes. Not so young. Those we lost early on were someone's sibling, someone's child, but these recent ones are also someone's mother, father, wife, husband, grandmother, grandfather. 

Last night I stayed up late, compiling a spreadsheet of names. I'm helping organize a reunion for people I worked with 30 years ago and one of my co-workers sent me several lists of names from way back then. 

The names floated out to me from mists of the past, bringing with them memories that had drifted out of reach, forgotten. Memories of days spent in a hard hat, sweating in the pipe alleys, laughing and eating popcorn in the control room, freezing in the lab. 

Too many names are already marked "deceased."

I sent the revised list out via email today - responses flowed back, informing me of updates: emails, phone numbers and more who have died before we had a chance to see them again.

This past Sunday, Father Don talked about fear, about trusting God. I know I've been lucky - I lost my brother Buster, my grandparents, my pets who felt like children, but I know so far I've been spared the true anguish that comes from losing a child, a parent, a spouse. Those who are pieces of you. 

The thing is, none of us can escape this pain. We can try by not letting ourselves get close to others, by trying not to love, but that's a living death, isn't it, living without loving?

I believe God will support me through that inevitable pain. I believe he will soothe and comfort me, if I let him, and I'm grateful for my faith. But how do those without faith survive? 

I came across this blog the other day, penned by a woman who has experienced the death of two children. I can't imagine that pain. But this is what I read on her blog: 

"All of my followers here on my blog know I am a twice bereaved parent. What very few of you all know is that I carried my oldest daughter across & personally handed her to the angels who completed the journey with her. So you can trust me when I tell you this: if you want to know where God lives put yourself somewhere in a place of peace; get lost in some music, or the soft sound of the wind in the trees, or anything that lifts you up. Close your eyes & feel the joy. THAT is where God lives, and THAT is where Heaven is."

For this whole month, she will be sharing her experience, sharing "...where and how I get my strength."

Click HERE to read along.

He himself is our peace. Ephesians 2:14

 

Where did the week go? Heck, where did the years go? (plus my Saturday Sweet Report)

I totally lost track of this week. Until this weekend, nothing extraordinary happened, but even so, it felt crazy and I was exhausted without knowing exactly why!

Our empty nest isn't so empty right now - TG is still home for the summer, along with the contents of her dorm room, currently in Transition-Limbo, tucked into random places. And as of this past Saturday, Daniel and the stuff from his apartment are back home in Transition-Limbo, as well.

Tom helped move him home then they both took off for several days of sun and fishing on the coast, leaving a maze of boxes and stuffed trash bags full of household items and clothes overflowing from Daniel's room.

While they were gone I had to cover for Tom, which meant making sure TG and I had something to eat and pulling the evening puppy duty as well as the morning one. Okay, it doesn't sound like much, but it felt like a lot and I was pooped. 

They rolled back in Thursday night, just in time to unpack, re-pack and head to Dallas (all of us) for a wedding.

See that cute chubby-cheeked boy in red below?

That's Quentin, one of Tommy's friends. They went through Boy Scouts together and helped each other earn their Eagle Scout ranks. Along with his dad and brothers, Quentin helped us build our house.

Somehow, he's old enough to get married now. How did that happen?

The photo above was taken at Tommy's 12th birthday party, when all it took to entertain those boys was pizza, video games, movies, boxing gloves and some kind of rowdy wrestling game that, if I remember correctly, involved jumping from trees and forced me to come inside before I started screaming "Be careful!" and embarrassing my children.

Ah, boys. Those were the days.

In just a blink or two from when this photo was snapped, Quentin graduated salutatorian from high school, graduated with a degree in Aerospace Engineering from Texas A&M and then decided to teach high school math and science. A pretty good decision because that's where he met Kristen, the high school Spanish teacher who is now his wife.

Funny how we somehow get to where we need to be, even though the path seems to zig-zag a bit.

These days, I believe Quentin finds Kristen much more entertaining than pizza and video games.

It was fun seeing those kids, all grown up. A bonus to the trip was having all of my kids together. TG and Daniel stayed at Tommy's house, while Tom and I snuck away to our very own hotel room - all by ourselves! It was kind of an early anniversary celebration - next week will be 29 years.

Talk about time passing in a blink of the eye!

This morning we enjoyed a wonderful Mexican food breakfast all together before zooming back home, where I changed clothes and headed to work for the First Saturday Dinner at the Bistro. Each month the Three Course Wine Lunch menu changes and they feature some of the new items at this special night event. Getting to see - and taste - some of the new items... definitely sweet!

Here are some other sweets from the week...

Sunday: seeing your son and husband heading off for a few days of coastal adventure; watching a movie with your daughter instead of tackling your to-do list.

Monday: a surprise call from a dear friend; a text from your son letting you know they made it to the coast okay; hearing that your sister is feeling better after being very sick... again.

Tuesday: finally making the decision to buy a lens you've been wanting and getting a surprise discount on it; a glorious blue and orange striped sunset.

Wednesday: a glimpse of a mama quail, babies parading behind her, making it safely across a busy road; trio of baby deer finally out in the sunshine where you could snap their photo.

Thursday: pink mornings; your husband and son straggling in safe and only slightly burnt from days of fun at the coast.

Friday: witnessing a wedding, being reminded of love that lasts a lifetime; catching up with long-time friends; dancing.

Saturday: sharing breakfast with your husband and all of your babies; arriving home safely from a road trip; a new book to review waiting for you in the mailbox; Banana Crumble with a glass of Mistella; moonlight on a vineyard.

Hope you took time to notice the sweet moments in your week!

 

 

 

"I hope." ~ Red, Shawshank Redemption

"Remember Red, hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things,

and no good thing ever dies."

~ Andy Dufresne, Shawshank Redemption

I've seen Shawshank Redemption a zillion times.  And last night I had two zillion things to do. So when TG started watching it, I tried to ignore it and focus on what I needed to do.

Along about the second half, I quit trying. Instead, I poured a glass of wine, plopped into the recliner beside her and forgot about my to-do's. This is why:

1. She'll be heading back to school soon and there won't be many more opportunities just to hang out at home like that, watching a movie together. Especially with the boys gone!

2. I love the movie.

3. That's all it took. I didn't need a #3.

I wasn't trying to analyze why I love Shawshank Redemption last night while I watched. But I kept thinking about it today and had to gather the thoughts, of course. Here they are (spoiler alert, in case there's actually someone who hasn't seen this movie!):

Hope... Andy holds on to hope despite life's best efforts to smash it out of him. Talk about bad luck! His hope is contagious; he and Red get to begin their lives over at middle-age because they dared to hope and believe that one day it would be possible. According to the movie - and I believe it whole-heartedly - it's never too late to live out a dream.

Integrity... I love how the movie illustrates what integrity is - the twist on how the criminals can have more integrity than the warden or the guards. And I love how Andy holds on tight to his integrity and inspires others to rise higher than they thought possible, to be better than they thought possible. To find the good in themselves.

Justice... Good overcomes evil, justice prevails and hope is justified.

Nothing says it better than Red at the end...

"I find I'm so excited, I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it's the excitement only a free man can feel, a free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain.

I hope I can make it across the border. I hope to see my friend and shake his hand.

I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams.

I hope."

 

"The End" of an Era (and my Friday Favorite Photo)

This is the book that was the beginning of the end.

Each evening for years and years, Daniel, TG and I would huddle around a book on the couch, taking the adventure together, a chapter at a time. I would read out loud, relishing the warmth of my two little ones cuddled up against me.  

Tommy had broken away on his own when he discovered the Goosebumps series in 3rd grade, devouring them one after another as fast as he could. Speed is addictive: he couldn't slow back down to our pace, savoring bites of the story, a little every day.

TG, Daniel and I were usually each reading something else as well on our own. But every night we'd come together for a special book. We'd take turns choosing it. This is when I introduced them to the Lord of the Rings, Call of the Wild, Black Beauty, Tarzan, Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle, the Wizard of Oz series... 

And then Daniel won a drawing in the school book fair. He got to pick any book he wanted, up to $15 value. We hadn't heard of the one above, but it looked promising. It had a cute cover, interesting-enough story line, and the kid on the front even looked a little like Daniel to me.

I didn't expect much from it, but I hadn't gotten through the first chapter before I felt jealous of the writing. The kids were irritated when I would stop reading in the middle of a critical scene to comment on some gem of a phrase or description. 

That, plus they didn't want to wait 24 hours to know what happened next. It was mutiny on the couch. What could I do?

They drew straws to see who got to read it first. Within a couple of days all three kids had finished it and I finally got my turn. I'm sure I was through it within a day or two, also.

There was no going back after that. We tried to rendezvous over a book a few more times, but they'd had their taste of independence: our Reading Hour fizzled to an end.

All because of Harry Potter.

With each new HP book, the scenario repeated itself... drawing straws, all-night reading sessions, keeping your lips sealed until everyone had read the book. (You could hear the sigh of relief after I closed the book - I was always last.)

Meanwhile, my kids grew and grew and grew. HP movies were made and we'd dutifully buy our tickets and watch them, but we were never satisfied. Admittedly, I always enjoyed them because I've never been able to remember details of books as well as my kids - they're harsh critics, let me tell you! I raised a fine litter of critical reader-geeks!

With that in mind, we didn't rush to be the first in line to see the final HP movie. It was one excuse, at least. Can you guess my other excuse? I hated to say goodbye. 

Yes, the book was finished long ago. I shed my tears back then, said goodbye to the characters, but I knew this movie was really the final goodbye to that era - an era of faces buried deep into books and kids who were shorter than me... of long summer days full of discussions about plot and character, good and evil. 

But I couldn't resist any longer - today I sat with my two twenty-something-year-old kids who'd known Harry and company half their lives... who'd grown up with Harry and Hermione and Ron... munching tons of popcorn and Milk Duds, reliving the last decade while watching the end unfold before me... the end of an era.

(Guess what we did after the movie? Dropped into Half-Price Books, of course!)

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And now, my Friday Favorite Photo, totally unrelated to Harry Potter. My crape myrtle is getting closer and closer to blossoming... I feared it had changed its mind due to lack of rain, but then I noticed this bud... I think it's going to make it!

 Hope you had a wonderful, magical Friday!

 

 

 

A Brother's Smile and other (belated) "Sweet!"s of the Week

The day his wife died, my brother Donnie lost his smile.

Well, he lost more than that; with just a glance at his drawn face, it was easy to believe he thought the world held absolutely nothing for him anymore. If it weren't for his children, I think he would have just sat in a corner and faded away.

But instead, he held on, gradually pulling himself back into the land of the living. Eventually the birth of his granddaughter reminded his face and heart how to smile. But it was still a rare and magical sight.

So you can imagine how ecstatic I am to report its return! He and his smile paid us an unexpected but very welcome visit this weekend, introducing us to the reason behind the smile's return: a girlfriend.

In other words... Love.

It turns out Donna grew up just around the corner from us. She and Donnie were great friends in high school but lost touch a few years later when he went in the Navy and she got married.

They recently reconnected via Facebook. He rode his Harley up to see her in person last month and he said it was like those years had never passed. (I believe him - he looks years younger!)

She lives in a little town not too far from us, so this weekend they drove over and spent the night. It was fun reminiscing, but more fun watching them beam at each other. 

What's rare now is his face without a smile. It's still hard for me to believe, but I tested it with my camera, always in the past a sure-fire way to make that smile run away and hide.

Not anymore, as you can see...

Aren't they cute? <sigh> Thank you, Donna! 

And thank you, Lord!

Accept the things to which fate binds you,

and love the people with whom fate brings you together,

but do so with all your heart.

~ Marcus Aurelius

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Between TG's birthday and Donnie's smile, that's already a lot of Sweet! but would you believe I spotted more sweet! moments this week? Here they are...

Sunday: spending a wonderful dinner with your niece-in-law while she's in town visiting her family

Monday: organizing a zillion loose to-do lists into one and scratching off tons of things before the day's over

Tuesday: finally getting your iPhone operational (it only took two full days and a few phone calls); a clean bathroom!

Wednesday: welcoming the newest baby Shallue into the world!; hours of work on your book; complete Lesson 1 of kim klassen's skinny mini class on Photoshop Elements (getting started is the hardest part!

Thursday: full moon waving goodnight through your kitchen window - at dawn; finally meeting the new parish priest; bougainvillea exploding with color even in a drought; sweet fresh strawberries 

Friday: mandatory employee wine-tasting session (!); just the moon, you, your camera and dog in the quiet of the night; a sweet comment from your mom on a blog post; watching a movie with your sweetie

Saturday: sleeping in; remembering the day twenty years ago when you first met your baby girl; an unexpected visit from your brother and getting to meet the woman who restored his smile

Sunday: fresh chocolate birthday cake washed down with a glass of cold milk

What was your most Sweet! moment this week?

 

 

 

 

Two Sweet Decades

A new era began for me today. 

At 6:59 this evening, my baby girl turned twenty years old, ushering me out of a twelve year stint in that fun club, "Mother of Teenagers."

Now I belong to "Mother of Just Twenty-somethings." I think I'll stop keeping track after this. It makes me feel old.

I dropped her off in town last night so she could celebrate with friends. Who wants to hang out with old people on your 20th birthday? Tomorrow we'll do the chocolate cake and special dinner thing for her. 

I'm having my own celebration tonight.... a night of reminiscing with my brother, getting to know the new love in his life.

But still, in the back of my mind, I'm thinking of where I was twenty years ago, holding that tiny pink bundle, relieved that my hours of labor were over and so happy to finally meet that little blue-eyed girl. Those hours of pain were totally worth the chance to hold her in my arms, though. I'd do it again in a heartbeat if I had to. The day she was born was a sweet, sweet day. And the past two decades have been packed with sweet moments, so many memories of a little girl that kept me hopping, that amazed me with her independence and self-confidence.

 

My twentieth birthday is a blur of twelve-hour shifts - I had to dig through old photos to trigger my memory. I found a handful of photos, depicting a brown-haired, smooth-skinned girl I barely remember...

...surrounded by people who loved her, although I doubt she knew the value of that love back then. Many of them are no longer in my life...

There are photos of me with my arms around Mam-ma and my ex-brother-in-law... one of me showing my quadriplegic brother Buster my gifts - a jewelry box and a set of knives for my apartment... one of me and my 24-year-old bearded, long-haired brother Donnie who is here with me tonight at the ripe old age of fifty-seven, clean-shaven and buzz-cut, who has come from the ashes of heartbreak to find new love.

So what do I tell my girl today? I think I'll tell her that life goes by quickly, to value these days and the ones who love her, because they're gone all too fast. I would tell her that life will be hard sometimes, but overall, life is really, really good. I would remind her that she comes from a line of strong women and not to worry about what's around the corner - she'll get through it just as they did, and she'll be able to find sweet moments every day, just as they did.

Just as I did two decades ago when I first looked into her sweet blue eyes. Just as I do now every time I look into her still sweet blue-green eyes.

Happy birthday, sweet baby girl!

"A daughter is the happy memories of the past, the joyful moments of the present, and the hope and promise of the future."  

~Author Unknown

 

 

 

 

 

"And now for something completely different..." Kitchen Tales, a Recipe and Post #1000!

When I was growing up, if I stepped one foot in the kitchen, my grandmother would suddenly appear beside me to see what I was doing. It didn't matter if I waited until she was in her bedroom with the door closed playing the piano and belting out "Oh, What a Friend We Have in Jesus", she would somehow sense a presence in her territory and promptly investigate.

Mam-ma wasn't ugly about it. She didn't forbid me to cook. She would even sometimes sense my uneasiness under her watchful eye and try to give me some space, ducking around the corner to the livingroom and only peering at me around the door frame, but before long she would be back inside, hovering at my shoulder. She just couldn't help it!

Needless to say, I didn't learn much about cooking back then, beyond what was taught in my one semester of 7th grade Cooking Class with Mrs. McDonald. By the time I was out on my own, with my very own kitchen, I was on a perpetual diet. I learned to bake chicken, steam broccoli and even made Magic Cookie Bars and a broccoli-cheese casserole for a company Christmas party, but otherwise I lived on dry roasted peanuts, picante sauce and chips, and microwaved baked potatoes. Quick and easy.

After Tom and I married, I began experimenting with recipes on my days off. I loved cooking - if I had a whole day to devote to it, that is. I scoured magazines for new recipes to try...

Then the children arrived; it was back to quick and easy and trying to cook something everyone liked. Pre-boxed, pre-jarred... even pre-cooked. The more "pre's" there were, the better! 

In recent years, I've cut out all of those "pre's" - I'm trying to eat healthy. But I still like "quick and easy". Cooking, and the inevitable cleaning up, are way down below writing and photography and playing the drums for me, so when preparing a meal lands on my shoulders, it's usually grilled chicken and fresh salad. (Tom will say it's always grilled chicken and fresh salad. And he might be right!)

So why in the heck did I sign up to develop a recipe with Knorr Chicken Stock for BlogHer? Not just cook something, mind you, but develop a new recipe?

Because the top recipes win an all-expense paid trip to the upcoming BlogHer Convention, which I could never afford otherwise, that's why.

But, seriously, what was I thinking? I couldn't win. It's not that I think I'm incapable - it's just not something I'm 'into' right now. You name it and cooking is way down below it. And then there's the time thing. I'm already stretched so thin there are days I think I'm going to POP!

I thought about backing out of it. But thinking about it is as far as I got on that because... well, I gave my word, for one thing. And also, it became a new challenge, a way to grow in an area I've sorely neglected. 

I believe learning and growing and challenging yourself is what this 50 decade is all about, so for two weeks, I tossed ideas around in my head, trying to come up with something new.

That's really, really hard, you know it?

I noticed the chef at the winery creating dishes using roasted cauliflower and that gave me an idea. I had tons of cauliflower in the fridge. I would just roast a bunch and then... hmmm. Then what?

I eventually did come up with a mostly-original recipe. Only 'mostly-original' because I adapted one of my old standbys from when all the kids lived at home, a recipe I got from a co-worker years ago: "Terry Boer's Chicken and Rice Casserole." (I kept it in a recipe box next to "Hoi Tranh's Butterfly Shrimp" and "Larry Corona's Manicotti" and "Jim Josey's Cheeseburger Pie." I loved working with guys who could cook!)

And I really love casseroles because you just toss everything together in one pan, slip it into the oven and let it cook.

But Terry's recipe wasn't very healthy. That was my challenge...

His called for buttering the pan. I used olive oil. His used white rice. I replaced it with organic, gluten-free short grain brown rice. Instead of a whole cut-up chicken that his recipe called for, I used boneless, skinless chicken breasts. Instead of two cans of 'cream of..." soup, I used Knorr's low-fat chicken stock. Instead of dried onion soup, I used fresh onion and other spices.

Then I added my own twist, adding lots of cauliflower, broccoli and mushrooms.

Guess what - it was good! Even TG and Tom agreed, although I think Tom still prefers Terry's (unhealthy) version.

So maybe it doesn't totally qualify for the contest, since it's more of an adaptation than a totally original recipe, but even if I'm disqualified, I feel good about the whole experience. My cooking confidence has been restored - although I think I'll still let Tom retain the Kitchen Crown. 

So without further ado, here's the completed recipe for, um, what should I name it? How about... "Barbara's Chicken, Veggie and Brown Rice Casserole"? Well, not very original, but my brain is tired. It'll have to do. 

Hope you enjoy it!

 

Barbara's Chicken, Veggie and Brown Rice Casserole

Ingredients

1 lb. Monterrey mushrooms, sliced

1/2 broccoli crown, cut into chunks

1/2 head cauliflower, cut into chunks

1 whole onion, chopped

3 lbs. boneless, skinless chicken breasts (about 5 breasts)

2 1/2 cups of chicken stock made from Knorr homestyle concentrated stock

1 1/2 cups of brown rice

1/2 tsp. dry mustard

1 tsp. garlic salt

1 tsp. black pepper

1/2 tsp. cayenne pepper

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Prepare chicken stock. Coat bottom of 9 x 13 pan with olive oil. Pour 1 1/2 cups of stock into pan. Add 1 1/2 cups of rice, covering bottom of pan. Place chicken on top of rice. Mix seasonings together and sprinkle on chicken, then top with  onions, mushrooms, cauliflower and broccoli. Pour remaining chicken stock on top.

Cover with foil and bake for 1 1/2 hours. Remove foil and bake for 15 minutes. Allow to sit for 5 minutes before serving.

Serves 8 to 10.

(If you make it, let me know what you think!)

 

And now, for something ELSE completely different...

 

 This was my 1000th post on Long Hollow! Whoo-hoo!!

It's hard for me to believe, but I'm sure my stats don't lie. Thank you to anyone out there who has actually read even half of them!

 

 

 

 

The (Only) Good Thing About a Drought

 

Because of the drought, the University of Texas is turning off their fountains to save water.

I'm glad I didn't procrastinate any longer than I did on Daniel's photo shoot. He would have looked funny sitting there in front of a stone dry Littlefield Fountain.

Imagine this one without the water shooting up... wouldn't it have looked like he was about to be run over by that, um, whatever it is?

Look out, Daniel!!!

 

I added the one below just because I like it.

I bet he was thinking, Surely she's almost through snapping photos...

I'd love to be standing in that fountain right now...

Well, I guess not right now, since they've turned them off.

But you know what I mean.

Okay, you've probably guessed that's not the good thing about a drought I was going to mention. It was just an excuse to post more photos of Daniel.

Plus I'm craving water.

No, the good thing I was going to mention about a drought is that it gives you a chance to clean all the silt out of your pond when it dries up.

That's what we did this past weekend.

(I use "we" lightly - I did a little bit more than snap photos, but not a whole lot more. As you can see, "we" is mostly Daniel and Tom.)

Belle helped, too.

I'm not sure what she did to help, but I'm sure it was very helpful. I believe she mostly stood in this teensy bit of water - all that's left on our property - trying to catch the last few minnows left alive.

Don't judge. Their days are numbered anyway in this heat, even if we do get a few drops of rain.

Check out the temperature  - this was in the shade on the front porch, around 4pm.

(Poor minnows.)

So now you know how Tom spent his Father's Day, in between checking on the brisket he smoked for dinner.

(It's okay. He takes naps on Mother's Day.)

I'm contributing this to Jillsy's June Water Challenge. It's definitely "water-challenged" don't you think?

Sweets on a Saturday and (another) belated Friday Favorite Photo

I have a good excuse for posting my favorite photos of the week today instead of yesterday...

I spent yesterday morning on the University of Texas campus, snapping photo after photo of Daniel dressed in his graduation robe and cap in front of the Tower, the Littlefield Fountain, Battle Hall, a row of beautiful old oaks, a turtle pond, a greenhouse... and then a few more without the robe and cap.

I knew my favorite of the week would be one of those so I waited until today to post it. Er, them. (I can do that because it's my blog!)

Professionals took photos of him before and after graduation, but honestly, they weren't very good. I decided to give it a shot getting a better one myself.

And, by golly, I think I did!

He was such a good sport, strolling around campus in his robe for an hour or so in the heat, giving me ideas on where to take the shots, standing wherever I directed him, letting me take "just one more, Daniel..."

There are a few shots where his face reflects, um, less exuberance than I felt, plus a few silly faces and one yawn, but I love those, too. And somehow he managed to keep pulling out smiles for me until I decided I had enough.

It was so hard to decide what to post as my favorites, but this first one is a classic pose for Daniel and that's why I chose it.

(He's struck "The Thinker" in Yellowstone National Park, Arizona, Big Bend... everywhere! Maybe I should create a coffee table book of all those Thinkers...)

 

I picked this next one even though he's not in his robe and hat because it was one of the last I took, and he's still smiling!

Plus, I just think it's really good of him. 

 

I love the colors in the first one, but also like it in black and white, so you get both versions.

 

(I'll post some of the others later, either here or on Confessions.)

 

*****************************************************

 

And now for my week of Sweet! moments...

Saturday: finding "treasure" at a church garage sale (extra Sweet! - just spending $2 for all of it!)

Sunday: pink toenails!

Monday: a walk down a country road with two goofy dogs on a hot summer afternoon

Tuesday: progress on a project (in my case, my book)

Wednesday: finally selling something you posted on Craig's List after being stood up half a dozen times, and deciding it was worth all the hassle because they're such sweet people

Thursday: soothing notes from a daughter's flute floating out from behind a bedroom door

Friday: early morning photo shoot with new college graduate/son; hearing a big brother giving job interview advice to his little brother.

Saturday: waking energized from a full (and rare) eight hours of sleep to a wide open day, full of possibilities

Now I'm off to wrestle my to-do list into a manageable size. Hope you have a fun, or productive or whatever-you-want-it-to-be Saturday!

If you have time, share some of your Sweet! moments from the past week with me.

Rambling on a Monday in May

Before I was fully awake this morning, I started the coffee brewing and switched on the television.

Up popped the devastation in Joplin, Missouri - that hospital with blown windows surrounded by mangled vehicles, toothpick trees and piles of rubbish ... the videos, the woman's voice praying "Help us, Jesus..."

After saying a prayer for all of those affected, I vowed never to complain about the weather here again.  

****************************

 May is almost over and I'm feeling paranoid. 

The past two Mays have given me belated birthday presents that I wouldn't re-gift to my worst enemy.

For my 50th birthday, May gave me a case of shingles which came with an MRI because of the headaches that heralded its arrival and steroid drops for my eyes so I wouldn't go blind.

Last year I guess May felt it had to top the previous one. First, it gave me the worst urinary tract infection of my life. (It was actually only my second ever, but the first one, thirty years ago, was so bad I took every precaution to avoid another.)

I thought that was it (thank you so much!), but then just a week or so later my heart went crazy, pounding and racing so hard and fast that it woke me up. I thought it was going to fly out of my chest! Follow up tests concluded it was  SVT, or Supraventricular Tachycardia, basically an electrical short circuit in my heart that causes it to pound and race. 

I haven't had another episode, or any other health scares, but then, May isn't over yet, is it? I'm just hoping this "Welcome to your 50's" initiation phase is over.

 ***************************************

My book review for A Jane Austen Education went live on BlogHer this evening (along with several others, if you want more than one opinion!)

I've been thinking about the book again today, mostly thinking it's a shame Jane Austen isn't required reading for everyone. Some people learn the lessons about life on their own that William Deresiewicz, the author, learned from the books, but I know quite a few people who have never learned them, such as the one he learned from Pride and Prejudice: we aren't born perfect and there are some lessons we have to learn on our own in order to grow. We can't learn them from other people. We have to experience our own failure.

I know this was certainly true for me when I was young (and maybe it's still true!). I wish it hadn't been - I wish I'd had the sense to take the advice of those older and more experienced than I was. I hope I have a teeny bit of that sense myself now.

Which reminds me... I saw a blurb on the news today that some state is considering holding parents responsible when their child gets a bad grade. Huh? Maybe I heard it wrong, but if it's true, don't they realize they're just giving parents more reason to do their kids' work for them or encourage them to cheat or that we'd be keeping kids from learning life lessons they need later on? Don't they realize no one is born perfect and everyone has a different path to follow? A different time line?

Where are these people coming from?  Why do some people think their way is the only way? 

Oops. Sorry.

Anyway, click HERE to read my review on BlogHer... and go read some Jane Austen!

******************************

 As far as Mondays go, this hasn't been a great one. Okay, it truly sucked in places (and I don't use that 's' word lightly.)

But I'm still keeping my eyes open for those Sweet! moments and keeping my feet moving forward, even though I don't know what's ahead of me.

These quotes help, so I'm going to add them here in case one of you needs a little 'faith reminder'. (I need them a lot - that's why I collect these quotes!)

"Suppose you plant a garden, and after a few days, you don't see results. Do you dig it up again? No, because you know that a lot of things are going on that you can't see. It's the same with God."

~ Charles Stanley, American Baptist preacher

"Patience with others is love, patience with self is hope, patience with God is faith." 

~ADEL BESTAVROS Egyptian deacon and lawyer

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."

~Proverbs 3:5-6

 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

~Jeremiah 29:11

"God often closes a door before opening a new one. Between those doors, don't worry. Wait, worship and watch! It's a test of faith. Colossians 4:3"

- Rick Warren

"Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason has once accepted, in spite of your changing moods."

~C.S. Lewis

 "Hope is wishing for something to come true. Faith is belief that it will come true. Believe that for every problem God gives you, He will also provide you with a solution."

Anyone know who said that? I love it!

But this is my favorite, and the one that truly keeps me going...

Everything works out in the end. If it hasn't worked out yet, it's not the end.

~Author Unknown

**********************************

And for me, this is proof of that nugget of truth... the path might be tough, but if you keep going, you just might get fireworks in your honor! (The last of my graduation photos, I promise. Here, anyway. I'll post the rest on "Confessions".) 

 

The Difference a Few Years Can Make

 

Back then...

He was short.

He loved Honey Nut Cheerios and Cyclops cookies.

He loved building things with Legos.

He loved books, making up stories, and playing 'what if...?'

He had a wild, wonderful imagination.

He could get lost in thought, observing and wondering about the world around him.

He loved learning.

He was funny.

He was sweet, sensitive, considerate and affectionate.

He had intense blue eyes that twinkled with mischief most of the time.

He loved his siblings.

He believed anything was possible.

Now...

Well, um, he's not short anymore.

Otherwise, I guess not much has changed. 

Lucky me. 

(Not!) The End.

 

I've gotten way behind on my blog and photography challenges, so this is my contribution to two...Jan's Focus 52 and Jillsy's May Challenge, "Childhood". Click the links or the image below to see the other contributions (and wish me luck winning a cool tripod from Jillsy!)

 

A Sweet Saturday (and my Friday Favorite Photo)

Last night we heard our middle son's name called, watched as he walked across a stage in his cap, gown and stole, watched him shake hands and receive a piece of paper that essentially read "Congratulations! You did it!"

That's why I waited until today to post my Friday Favorite Photo...

Congratulations, Daniel!!! We're so proud of you!

I haven't forgotten to look for and record a Sweet! moment every day - I just haven't had time to post them every day, as I intended.

Instead, my new idea is to post them all on Saturday. Hope you'll pop in each week and share your own favorite Sweet! moments with me!

Here are a few of mine from this past week...

• Saturday - Dancing to the music of Los Lonely Boys under a bright Texas moon.
• Sunday - Being able to wish Tom another birthday (joined by 2/3 of the kids: Extra Sweet!)
• Monday - Having someone to call for help when you need it, because all of us need help every now and then.
• Tuesday - Waking early enough to say Goodnight to the moon before it slips under the covers and Good morning to the sun as it rises for the day. 
• Wednesday - Unpacking boxes of well-worn, well-loved children's books that transport you back in time to a couch, snuggling with your little ones, reading before bed. 
• Thursday - Puppy dog smiles, pure joy and unconditional love. Sweet words from friends.
• Friday - Witnessing someone you love reach a long-awaited, hard-fought goal.  

More photos later, but we're off to continue the celebration... Hope you're having a Sweet Saturday!

The moon, my honey and Los Lonely Boys...

Saturday night, a Texas moon smiling down on me and Tom by my side, I had one of those Aha! moments.

I realized I was finally experiencing Austin with all five senses in a way I hadn't yet in the nearly sixteen years we've lived here.

I could feel it in the just-cool-enough breeze blowing through the courtyard of Stubb's Bar-B-Q, taste it in my jalapeno brisket taco, hear it in the music of Willie Nelson's son, Lukas, and his band, Promise of the Real and then even more in Los Lonely Boys, those sons of San Angelo, see it in trees and old stone buildings bordering the courtyard and in the diversity of the other fans ... young, old, straight, gay, preppy, hippie, Austin Weird, every race and color imaginable ... and even smell it in the air, an intermittent wafting of barbecue with a hint of... is that marijuana?

Yeah, that's Austin.

Stubb's doesn't allow detachable lenses (discrimination!) and I don't own a point-and-shoot or an iPhone, so I don't have any photos from Saturday night, just these images impressed on my mind.

But here are some photos from the rest of the birthday boy's weekend...

A happy breakfast a la me and Daniel for the birthday boy

Walking with the boys, Kirby and...

...the goofy dogs.

The boys spotted this beetle (just like old times!) Anyone know what it is? 

Ping-pong!!

Cheesecake!

A birthday wish...

...and a nap.

Not bad for #54.

On Dreams ... and Sweet #5

"Nothing happens unless first we dream." ~ Carl Sanburg

So true. But dreams are just seeds - they don't bloom without the right conditions and it's up to us to help them along. We have to water them. Plant them where they'll get enough sunshine. 

I've been prodded several times just in the past few days to keep moving on my dreams - to nurture them.

• Saturday night Shake Russell stood a few feet away from me and sang, "...you're only as strong as your dreams. Don't give 'em up for a stack of green. Keep right on going and you'll see what I mean..." from one of his latest songs. (I'll post about this, but I've barely had time to look at my photos!)
• Last night I finally watched the movie "Up" - it's about an elderly man finally following through on a dream he shared with his wife, after she passes away.
• Today I saw the Sanburg quote up above.

But I already planned to use this day to further my (latest) dream, a personal history business, where I can use my love of writing and history and genealogy and general nosiness about people's lives to help them preserve their stories as legacy - and today I registered the name and secured the domain (I didn't even make up my mind on it until I was in the county tax office!) 

 

The name I chose is...

"Memory to Legacy"

So...what do you think?

Huh? You don't like it? Well, there's no going back now, so please don't even tell me!

(Thank you to everyone who gave me feedback on some of my choices and gave me other ideas. It really helped. Please don't be mad if I didn't choose your favorite!This one isn't even my first pick!)

It's scary, this "going into business" for myself thing, especially since we're already pretty broke. But I feel I'm moving in a direction I'm supposed to (does that make sense?) so at this point, I'm not too worried. Next month when I'm trying to pay bills it might be different, but right now I feel very optimistic.  Shake's words help: "...don't give them up for a small stack of green..."  which to me means a another job I don't enjoy but that provides a steady paycheck.

While I was busy trying to figure out how to secure the domain and link it to my blog host, Tom was huffing and puffing, carrying even more bookshelves into my library. So that dream has moved even further along as well, bless my sweet husband's heart. 

I'm hoping I'll have time to work on my book and photography during downtime on my business. The clock is ticking and I need to stop dawdling and get busy.

Okay, now for my Sweet!...

 It's funny - now that I've started this Sweet! series, it's actually tough to pick just one to post a day. Making the final decision on a name felt really good. Plus, today, I got to see 2/3 of my kids - even had lunch and a great philosophical discussion with 1/3. A funny Mother's Day card from my oldest third arrived in the mail. And I found a penny on the floor just as I was handing over the paperwork for my name. (A great reminder of "In God We Trust")

All pretty Sweet!

But I'll stick to the dream theme for Sweet #5:

Moving a step (or two) closer along the path to your Dream.

What is your dream and what have you done lately to make it come true?

P.S. I received word today that someone who played a big part in our lives has Stage 4 cancer in their liver, colon and lungs, and just started chemo. Please, please keep this person in your prayers! Thank you!

 

 

 

Happy Mother's Day! (and Sweet! #4)

It didn't take me long to break my own Sweet! rule - I didn't post one yesterday. But I've forgiven myself and will just get back on track today with this one...

Listening to soulful music sung live and loud by the Shake Russell Trio and Michael Hearne right in my own livingroom, surrounded by music-loving friends.

Sweet!

Details coming on that later...

Today, quite appropriately for Mother's Day, but mostly because I'm plain tuckered out, the Word of the Day is Relax! I've spent the day hanging out with 1/3 of my kids, specifically Daniel whose finals are mostly over with so he could afford the time to come home this weekend.

The other two couldn't be here, but they called! (That's a bonus Sweet! for sure!)

Daniel's done a great job filling in for all of them, helping get the house back in order, watching a movie with me and just talking.

(Tom disappeared - we discovered him back in bed, snoozing away. I think he takes a nap every Mother's Day!  I don't begrudge him, though, especially this year. He worked and cooked like a maniac yesterday, preparing for the home concert.)

I missed seeing my own mom, but enjoyed talking to her on the phone. 

I'm sending good thoughts and virtual hugs to all of you mothers out there - and special prayers for those of you who have spent the day aching from the loss of a child or your own mother. 

And now, something to make you smile and remind you that "motherhood" isn't necessarily something defined by genetics... (thanks for sending this to me, Rick!) ...