Long Hollow

What Do You Worry About?

 

The older I get, the less I worry. 

That doesn't mean I don't worry. Just that I'm beginning to realize worry doesn't help anything.

Prayer does, so the older I get, the more I pray.... that God will show me what I can do to help the situation, and if there's nothing I can do, to help me step back and let him take care of things.

...And that no matter what, I never lose hope.

When I do worry, it's about my kids... our finances... Tom's health... um... I think that's it. Next to those, nothing else seems to matter that much.

Oh, I pray about much more than that... issues that my friends and family are dealing with... social problems in the world... but I'm talking about that knotted up, gray-cloud-of-despair, helpless type of worry.

I recently came across this list that author F. Scott Fitzgerald gave to his 11-year-old daughter, Scottie, in 1933.  

Things to worry about:

Worry about courage
Worry about cleanliness
Worry about efficiency
Worry about horsemanship

Things not to worry about: 

Don’t worry about popular opinion
Don’t worry about dolls
Don’t worry about the past
Don’t worry about the future
Don’t worry about growing up
Don’t worry about anybody getting ahead of you
Don’t worry about triumph
Don’t worry about failure unless it comes through your own fault
Don’t worry about mosquitoes
Don’t worry about flies
Don’t worry about insects in general
Don’t worry about parents
Don’t worry about boys
Don’t worry about disappointments
Don’t worry about pleasures
Don’t worry about satisfactions

Things to think about: 

What am I really aiming at? 
How good am I really in comparison to my contemporaries in regard to:

(a) Scholarship
(b) Do I really understand about people and am I able to get along with them? 
(c) Am I trying to make my body a useful instrument or am I neglecting it? 

With dearest love,

Daddy

I don't agree with him on all of the items (horsemanship?), but I do on quite a few (especially the "nots") and like that he divided it between things we have control over and things we don't.

I wish I'd had the forethought to give my kids a list like this when they were younger. 

They probably wouldn't have listened to me, though.

I wonder if F. Scott's daughter listened to him? Probably not. We all seem to have to learn the hard way, right?

So... what do you worry about? 

 

Flowers for Leontien (and other Sweet!s)

June 3 will mark the 4th anniversary of my first blog post.

I started blogging because, as I write in my "About" section up above...

"Diaries, letters, and scrapbooks became journals, writing classes and essays became Long Hollow (and a few fictional works in progress...) 

But come to find out, what started as an outlet for my journaling and writing needs also satisfied this desire inside of me to connect with people. I was the kind of kid who wrote letters to everyone I knew and wanted tons of pen pals all around the world.

Blogging has given that to me.

Through my blogs... this one and my photography blog... I've met people I probably would never have connected with otherwise.

Just to name a few, there's the  Methodist minister in South Africa. The anesthesiologist/playwright in California. And the transplanted Wisconsonian photographer/artist/animal lover living near Dallas named TexWis Girl.

Earlier this week, I received an email from TexWisGirl letting me know about a surprise blog event called Flowers for Leontien, scheduled for today at 8 am, in honor of fellow blogger, Leontien Vandelaar of Four Leaf Clover Dairy.

I actually don't know Leontien, but she is battling cancer, and other bloggers who do know her felt our support and participation in this event would show her that her blogging community is there for her -- by posting a flower photo with {{hugs}} as the message to Leontien on our blogs today and linking to the "Flowers for Leontien" post on A Rural Journal.

By coordinating our posts, TexWisGirl and others hope to demonstrate how much the blogging community cares for Leontien and is thinking of her at this difficult time. A big beautiful virtual bouquet delivered right to her computer.

As I said, I don't know Leontien, but it moves me that these other bloggers are doing what they can to support their friend, and reaching out to others to gather as much support as possible.

So Leontien, this Texas flower is for you with lots of {{hugs}}. 

I'll keep you in my prayers, for strength and peace and healing. I'm grateful for this blogging community that connected us.

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What a coincidence that the BlogHer Life Well Lived question this week is: How does blogging, journaling, writing and connecting online help to increase your happiness?

I think I just answered that question.

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And now for a few other Sweet!s of my week.. 

Sunday: talking to all three kids in the same day; your mom calling to make sure you're okay; a call from your husband

Monday:a butterfly landing on your shoe; progress on your book for the first time in a few weeks; a blog friend using your photo in his post 

Tuesday: dinner with 2/3 of your kids; payday for one of your jobs; veggie omelettes; a porch swing at night, with a view of the crescent moon

Wednesday: free home grown onions sitting in a basket at your veterinary clinic when you go to pick up your expensive dog food; fortune cookies that tell you what you want to hear; your mom calling to check on you; more progress on your book

Thursday: your sister thinking of you when she sees an exciting photography opportunity; finally getting your Easter decorations put away; editing photos on a new, fast computer; making arrangments for a fun summer vacation at the beach with family

Friday: being back in high school and not caring if anyone likes you; a hug from a friend, via her little girl; goofy dogs; salmon colored sunsets

Saturday: joining other bloggers to offer support and prayers to a fellow blogger

Share your Sweet!s with me! I love to hear them! I hope your next week is full to the brim with them!

...Toss your hat into the latest BlogHer Life Well Lived Sweepstakes for a chance to win an iPod Touch and a $50 iTunes gift certificate to go with it. Go to the Live Well Lived main page to see the other answers and add your own to the comments.

For proper disclosure...

Adventurous Kids, No Dead Armadillos on the Porch, and other sweet things

My kids are off adventuring this weekend. I'm living vicariously through them. That's my right as their mother, isn't it?

The oldest and his love are in San Diego... yesterday they caught a glimpse of a migrating grey whale while kayaking!

The other two are off caving, separately. One in Austin and one a bit west of here.

A portion of my book takes place in a cave, so I asked them to take notes and photos for me, and they graciously agreed. (I had plans to go caving myself last weekend as research, but didn't make it because of my birthday party. No regrets!)

I love, love, LOVE it that these babies of mine love exploring and experiencing the wonders of this world, even though it keeps me on my knees praying in hyper-drive. 

On another note, is it just me turning a year older or has time suddenly shifted into a higher gear? This past week has gone by in a blur. My head is spinning and I've trouble keeping track of what day it is, much less my email!

But I managed to keep track of my Sweet!s, and here they are...

Saturday: being totally blown away and humbled by the generosity of your friends and family; a friend's beautiful paintings in person; sweet friends' faces you didn't expect to see

Sunday: Mass with your husband and son; the greening of a vineyard; fresh brick oven pizza; enjoying the last episode of season one of The Game of Thrones with 2/3 of your kids; finally getting a chance to play with your new Mac computer

Monday: new computer technology (amazing!); butterflies and dragonflies; friends who find you things they know you'll love at garage sales

Tuesday: high school theater classes; getting paid to watch the movie "Gandhi"; evening sunlight turning weeds into art

 

(the fish that swallowed Gepetto in Pinocchio - the artist is the girl on the left)

Wednesday:; finishing a good book; being able to help your baby; photography workshops; the frogs' midnight chorus welcoming you 

Thursday: watching the night sky turn into a cloudless sunrise; a fourth-grader's definition of happiness; teaching adverbs to fourth-graders

Friday: sleeping in; a day off to play with your new computer; new running shoes, long overdue and half off the regular price; sharing a quesadilla and a movie at home with your sweetie; your dogs not dragging the dead armadillo up onto the porch

Saturday: a wiggly, grinning puppy, first thing in the morning; dragonflies filling the air; pink cactus blossoms; your kids doing research for your book for you, and calling to let you know they're okay

Um, did you notice the 'dead armadillo' thing up there? I spared you the photo I took of it (it's a sickness, I tell you, taking pics of everything!)

Tom and I discovered the poor deceased thing on our walk Friday afternoon. In fact, he almost stepped right on it.

We suspect our dogs had something to do with its death, but have no proof. If they're guilty of its demise, I'm sure they only did it to protect us from great harm.

Sigh.

I really am just grateful they didn't feel the need to deposit that nasty thing on the front porch as is their usual custom with dead animals. We're making progress!

Vultures have been partying around here, as you can imagine, soaring through the skies. Since I didn't post the armadillo's portrait, I'll leave you with the vulture's... I bet he added the dead armadillo to his sweet! list!

What were your sweet! moments of the week? Share!

Life

There are times in life when everything hits at once.

Your car has issues, your family has issues, your house has issues, your job has issues... 

Opportunities drop onto your path that will scurry away if you don't jump on them right this instant but you don't know how you can squeeze another minute out of your day. Bills need to be paid but you don't know how you're going to squeeze another penny out of your dollar.

That's when you need to step back and realize that even if you're not sure how you're going to deal with the issues or take advantage of the opportunities or pay the bills, things could be worse.

Having these problems means you have a car, you have a family, you have a house, you have a job. You have dreams and hope and faith.

Smile. Breathe. Laugh.

Even if there is nothing to laugh about, laugh on credit.

~ Unknown

 

Traipsing through Cemeteries and other Sweet!s

It might seem unusual to wander through a cemetery on your birthday, but that's what I did yesterday.

There's a small one dating from the 1850's down the highway toward Marble Falls. When I heard it was blanketed with bluebonnets, I couldn't wait to visit it. There's just something about wildflowers growing beside a headstone that I find quite beautiful.  A reminder of fragility of life, the cycle of life, of life after death.

How appropriate for a birthday, especially one that falls on Good Friday, right?

After exploring the cemetery, offering prayers for the souls of those resting there and their families, we drove on to Marble Falls, where we visited a few eclectic antique and art shops in the old part of town (Tom and Daniel are such good sports!), and enjoyed dinner at a restaurant overlooking the lake.

Best of all, later that evening I got to share the traditional birthday cheesecake with all three of my kids. 

Just icing on a week full of sweet! moments...

Sunday: fields of bluebonnets and prairie verbena; pizza from a brick oven; sitting on the back deck on a beautiful spring night with your son and talking for hours

Monday: daily chats with your mom; finding a pair of shoes in your closet you'd forgotten about; butterflies; talking about your day over dinner with your sweetie

Tuesday: four-year-olds... especially their smiles and hugs and imaginations; working with a friend; reading a new book

Wednesday: a surprise birthday lunch with friends; creme brulee; a vineyard, caliche road and tin roof glowing in moonlight

Thursday: birthday cards in the mail; a birthday call from a dear friend and your uncle; practicing the drums; a full moon welcoming your birthday

Friday: greeting another birthday morning; breakfast, courtesy of your husband and son; birthday surprises in the mailbox; birthday wishes via phone, email and Facebook; bluebonnets blanketing a cemetery; sharing cheesecake and a movie with all three kids

Saturday: a lazy Saturday at home 

I hope you had a week full of sweet! moments, too!

 

Catching My Breath (and other Sweet!s)

I haven't blogged in a whole week. I think that's a record. 

Snippets and ideas for posts have popped in my head - random words are scribbled on scraps of paper all over the house and in the car - but I haven't been able to stop long enough to work them into full posts.

This morning Life is moving slower and I'm hoping today I can focus my attention on those poor, neglected Good Intentions and Need-To-Do's I see moping in a dusty corner.

It's been a fun week, though. No exotic vacations or anything, but just Life and all of the challenges and adventures and love it provides. There have been beautiful spring days that turned into powerful thunderstorms with blustery winds and cold temperatures... which meant stinky country dogs cowering in the laundry room... but we're back to Spring and warmth and outside dogs now.

While I'm grateful for the rain, I'm not so grateful for the mosquitoes it awakened. They buzzed and bit me every step of my walk this morning. You can be sure I'll thoroughly douse myself with repellent every morning from now on.

Yesterday, TG fixed me breakfast... a delicious sauteed veggies/scrambled eggs concoction she prepared every morning over Christmas break that set my stomach growling with its divine smell. But it was always several hours after I'd already eaten.

I'm too lazy to go to that much trouble myself first thing in the morning, but yesterday I slept late after a sleep-deprived weekend and she woke up early to prepare for a Spring Break trip to the coast... which means we woke up at the same exact time! So when I saw the eggs and veggies coming out of the fridge, I worked out a deal with her involving laundry.

One of the best deals I've ever made! It turned out to be just as delicious as it smelled, and sustaining enough for a day on the run that included seeing her disappear into one of five chartered buses for an overnight drive (and praying the whole way home for their safety!)

Sunday morning I met a blog friend for the first time in person. Non-bloggers (or non-FlickRers, etc.) probably don't understand how exciting that is.  They might have trouble understanding how you can become friends with total strangers you connect to online but have never seen face-to-face, but I can assure you those friendships are just as real as any other. 

Wolf, of Just Add Father, was in town for a dad blogger conference. He delayed his flight home to meet me, Tom, and 2/3 of my kids for brunch downtown at the Driskill Hotel's 1886 Cafe and Bakery. It was just like meeting a long-time friend I hadn't seen in a while. 

Wolf is a pseudonym (he explains why he uses one on his blog) so we had some fun taking this photo below. I wanted one I could post here. (I'm sure the people sitting at nearby tables were wondering what the heck we were doing!) 

We chatted awhile on the sidewalk after eating, but knew it was time to part ways when my kids (ages 20 and 23!) got restless and started roughhousing on the sidewalk. 

Some things never change!

Actually, we needed to leave anyway because Wolf wanted to walk around and see the Austin sights before heading for the airport, and we wanted to get back to the house to visit with my oldest and his fiance before they had to leave.

They were in town for a wedding. After the reception on Saturday night, they brought friends back to the house with them and all of us were up really, really late visiting and laughing. I always enjoy seeing those grown-up kids, even though it makes me feel old, wondering how these kids who I swear were in middle school yesterday are now out of college, working, married...

Totally worth getting only 4 hours of sleep.

No, really it was.

<yawn>

Anyway, Sunday afternoon I grilled chicken and enjoyed a quick dinner with them, before dashing off (late!) to my writer's group meeting.

Even after all this time, my book is still a misshapen piece of clay. Writing is so dang hard. But with these women's input and guidance, it's beginning to take shape, although it still needs lots and lots of pinching, molding, scoring...

It's tough - even painful - but I'm grateful to them and willing to do whatever work is necessary to have a finished piece by the end of the year.  

Saturday I took a short road trip along Highway 281 to San Antonio. A friend of mine hosted a Silpada jewelry party for me.

Highway 281 runs through the Texas hill country and several small towns... a beautiful drive, even on a rainy day like Saturday. I spotted my first bluebonnets, splashes of blue drizzled along the roadside. I promised myself I'd drive out this week on a sunny day and take some photos.

Jewelry parties are always fun, what with the food and drinks, the sparkly silver bling, and meeting lots of interesting women, but this one was especially fun because Jackie and I went to high school together, but didn't really know each other until just recently. We reconnected thanks to Facebook and discovered we didn't live that far from each other.

Here we are with another high school friend, Marilyn, who came to the party. She lives even closer to Jackie but they didn't even realize it until recently.

And here I am with one of my dearest friends, Nancy, the first person I met when we moved to Lago. She now lives near San Antonio, so she and her daughter took advantage of the situation and came to the party, too. 

You just can't beat reconnecting with friends, playing with pretty jewelry, and making money at the same time, can you?

The rest of the week was a blur of writing, reading, subbing at the high school, trying to catch up on emails, and watching the Hollow explode in greens, blue, yellows, pinks, and purples. I'm hoping not to get lost in the busy-ness of this week.

I do want to mention Tuesday, though. I spent the day swim suit shopping with TG in preparation for this trip to the coast. There's always more under the surface than shopping, though... there's talking, laughing, sharing, and just soaking up the sight of her.

In one store, going through a clearance rack, I came across the perfect shirt to describe the way I feel...

We took turns trying it on and snapping pics with my iPhone, but in the end, I just went ahead and bought it. How could I not? It was cheap and fit perfectly, in so many ways!

And now for the official Sweet! report:

Monday: time to be still and breathe, sitting on a rock beside a pond, listening to running water and chattering birds, watching silly dogs and flirting dragonflies

Tuesday: hours spent with your daughter... shopping, talking, laughing; finding a really good fortune in your Panda Express cookie

Wednesday: porch swings; flowers and tree buds popping out everywhere

Thursday: finishing a great book; high school one-act plays

Friday: rainy days when a drought is fresh in your memory; some of your kids home for the weekend

Saturday: clouds sitting on hilltops; roadsides sprinkled with bluebonnets; a job that lets you catch up with 'old' friends and meet new ones; sangria; staying up late visiting with your kids and their friends, who used to be kids but somehow turned into adults; the birth of a great-nephew and photos on Facebook

Sunday: meeting a blog friend in person for the first time; brunch and people-watching at the Driskill Cafe; an afternoon with your son and future daughter-in-law; a writing group that keeps your ego in check

Monday: sleeping in after a sleep-deprived, busy, busy weekend; spending time with your baby girl 

Wishing each of you a week full of sweet moments!

Sky Blue, Sketches, and other Sweet!s (and Bittersweets) of the week

Sky Blue is my favorite crayon color of all time.

Today, God picked it to color the sky. I could imagine him sprawled on the floor of heaven, opening that big box of 96 (the one with the sharpener,) pulling out the Sky Blue, then, with side to side strokes, filling in the entire sky. 

For hours I lay under it on a folding lounge chair of the same color... even reading from a book with a Sky Blue color... wearing jean shorts, flip-flops, and a tank top the same shade of green as the new grass and fresh tree buds, my skin soaking up the sun like the dry winter ground soaks up the spring showers.

I rarely read for hours in a row like that and it felt so good to just lose myself in a story. It helped that I could call it "working"... it was the latest BlogHer Book Club book I'm going to review. I can't tell you the title yet, but I can tell you that I can hardly put the dang book down.

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Yesterday I came home from work to find a mysterious manila envelope on my desk. The name on the return address looked vaguely familiar, but I couldn't place it.

 Inside I found a heart-melting sketch of my Max puppy... 

It turns out my sweet sister commissioned a wonderfully talented friend of hers, Susan Bromlow, a high school classmate, to sketch this drawing from one of my photos of Max on my blog. Susan (as you can see) is a talented artist. Click HERE to view more of her work.

What a sweet surprise and precious treasure! Thank you so much, Brenda and Susan! 

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Here are a few other sweet moments from the past week....

Monday: a good report from your doctor; lunch with your husband who took the day off

Tuesday: paychecks in the mailbox; an hour on the phone with your oldest, just catching up; clearing out closets and giving things away; a new part time job, helping with the income you need to keep working on your book without finding a full time job

Wednesday: hearing, then seeing, two red-tailed hawks streaking through the Hollow; a golden sunset that fills the sky and stretches to the horizon

Thursday: a gorgeous blue Mexican Jay couple, straw in beaks, busy building a nest; a last-minute, long-overdue catch-up lunch with friends; meeting lifetime friends from out of town for a spur-of-the-moment dinner 

Friday: walking at sunrise; another paycheck in the mailbox; bees buzzing fragrant mountain laurel blooms; daffodils and redbuds; your son's face, up close and in person

Saturday: making an unhappy customer happy again; spending time with both sons plus your future daughter-in-law and her family; an amazing sketch of your puppy arriving in the mail box; a friend's support of your writing

Sunday: sleeping in; an afternoon spent reading in the sunshine

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Before I could publish this post, Tom's dad called to let us know Tom's Aunt Marg had passed away. Please pray for the repose of her soul and for her family. Hearing of her death isn't sweet, of course, but the memories of her in my heart sure are.

Soon after Tom and I were married, we traveled to Wisconsin to meet his dad's side of the family. Aunt Marg opened her home to us, hosting a corn roast and sharing tons of family photos and mementoes.

A few years later, she spent about a week with us. In turn for teaching me how to cross stitch (I became an addict for several years) we took her to Gilley's where she even rode the mechanical bull.

                                   

Summer before last we saw her again in Wisconsin at a family wedding. It had been several years since we'd last seen her... maybe a decade... but she hadn't changed a bit, still as feisty as ever.  She even got out on the dancefloor!

I'm so grateful TG was able to meet her - they really clicked - and for all the memories I have tucked in my heart. Please keep her family in your prayers.

Rest in peace, Aunt Marg. We love you!

Beauty in the Midst

Last week I helped celebrate my cousin Ronnie's life. 

Looking through the photos afterward, Claire Bidwell Smith's words kept coming back to me...

"Even in the midst of all this pain and sadness I see something beautiful."

 

I snapped this one of Ronnie's sister Cindy surrounded by her daughters, grandkids, and great-granddaughter because of the palpable feeling of support they gave her, as well as the sweet hug and kiss of comfort from a grandson to his grandma. I had never even met some of these generations before, my own cousins once or twice or three times removed.

 

I had to capture this smile on my mother's face as she met her great-great niece, Khloie, and the proud smile on Khloie's grandma's face.

 

Representatives of the Veterans of Foreign Wars paid tribute to Ronnie's military service with a few words at the graveside ceremony. 

The man in overalls on the far left was Ronnie's neighbor, a good friend who drove Ronnie to and from his many doctor visits. 

 

 

 

Charles and Howard are brothers, my cousins. 

I had good visits with both of them on this day. 

I can't remember the last time I saw either one of them. Perhaps it was at a funeral.  It makes me sad to think the next time I see them will probably be at another funeral.

 

 

Martha and my mom's friendship goes all the way back to junior high. Martha's sweet face always appears in those times when Mama needs support, reminding me of my own longtime friends. (I wonder what they talk about when I'm not around?) 

 

Tex-Mex for lunch afterwards with my parents and sister, Brenda. 

Mama and Daddy aren't often this dressed up. I used this opportunity for a photo shoot. Daddy made me work for it, though.

"Well, that's okay, but Daddy, this time remember to look down just a little so the flash doesn't bounce off of your glasses. And smile!"

 

"Hmmm... better, but Daddy this time don't take a bite of food before I take the picture and really smile! You know I'll keep taking them until you do what I tell you."

 

 "That's it! Perfect!" (He knew I meant it!)

Flowers for Juana

Today my friend Juana will be celebrating her husband's life at a funeral Mass in Spain. She lost him unexpectedly last week, just 20 days after she was able to join him there, eager to start the next phase of their lives after living two years with the Atlantic Ocean between them.

It's some consolation to her to know his death brought life to others... she says "A man of his age has his liver. A boy of twenty-one on dialysis - his kidney. Another kidney to a another boy of 30 and A 17-year-old boy has recovered his sight thanks to Pepe's cornea." But still, my heart breaks for her.

I can't remember how or when I discovered Juana's blog, Between USA and Spain, but even though Juana and I have never physically met, we clicked and became fast friends.

She started her blog to chronicle the days until she and Pepe could be together again. He was starting a job in Spain; she was staying in Atlanta until her youngest daughter graduated from college, then she would join him.

Through her blog and photographs, Juana introduced us to her entertaining, (crazy!), loving family... she shared with us the pain of living apart from the man she loved... she took us with her to visit him in Spain.

Through her words I got to know Pepe for the wonderful husband, father, grandfather, and friend he was. I could see his sense of humor and his kindness. I could see the joy they felt together, felt their strong love, and helped her count down the days until the airplane took her across the ocean to be with him again for more than just a visit. 

Juana, I can't be there physically to support you today, but I'm following Jen's lead and sending you some Texas Hill Country wildflowers. Not as pretty as Jen's Costa Rica beauties, but as I'm watching them pop up along the roadside again here, they make me think of you and Pepe, and the many seasons of life. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

With the flowers comes much love, as well as prayers for strength and peace, patience and comfort.

"My heart trusts in the Lord, and I am helped." ~ Psalm 28:7

 

Sunsets that Kiss the Sky, Silly Things That Make Me Cry, and other sweets of the week

I'm late with my sweet!s. It feels like a whole month was stuffed into last week...highs and lows, late nights and early mornings, and miles and miles on the road. I've only been home long enough to sleep the past few days. I haven't even gone on a morning walk with my puppies since Friday!

I had to ignore Max and Belle's puppy dog eyes once again this morning so I could make it to my allergy doctor appointment on time. Somehow I missed the past two yearly check-ups. But that just means I've been asthma-free! A very good thing after a lifetime of asthma, of doctor visits and pills and shots and too many trips to the emergency room to count.

But listen to this... based on high scores on my peak flow and lung function tests ("better than average!") I don't have to see him again for another year and a half. Now that's sweet!

Keeping track of the sweet moments in each day has become a habit, hallelujah! Some days I'm better at it than others, but overall I spot them much easier and more often than I ever did before. I know there aren't more sweet!s... I'm just keeping my eyes and heart more open to recognizing them when they grace my way.

I urge you to try, too, if you're not already. It puts a lightness in my heart I would never have imagined possible.

"Even in the midst of all this pain and sadness I see something beautiful."

~ Claire Bidwell Smith

Earlier this week I admitted to a friend that I don't cry as easily as I used to. It kind of worried me, in a way, but I thought perhaps it was because I'm better able to accept the bumps, roadblocks, detours that come in life.

But then the next day Lisleman (from A Few Clowns Short) sent me a short film - he said he knew I'd like it because I'm a writer.  That's pretty sweet! by itself. 

Well, I did like the film. In fact, I loved it! So much that by the last scene I was sobbing! Happy, sad, bittersweet tears, all at the same time. It is one of the most creative, best made, sweetest films I've ever seen. I also realize I'm kind of a book addict, and that probably has a lot to do with why I love it, but I truly think it would bring at least a smile to everyone's face.

Here's the link: The Fantastic Flying Books of Mr. Lessmore 

If you watch it and love it, please let me know. If you don't love it, well, okay, go ahead and let me know that, too. I promise I won't hold it against you. 

Well, I promise I'll try not to hold it against you.

(P.S. Lisleman just let me know it won an Oscar last night for Best Animated Short Film. Yay!)

Friday night I attended Stations of the Cross, something I try to do at least once during Lent... step out of my busy life and really reflect on Christ's sacrifice, his Passion, the last moments of his life on earth, on the fourteen significant moments between his condemnation to his placement in the tomb. I try to consider how I can apply them to my own life. 

This year the Stations in our church were done a little differently than in past years. While our priest moved from station to station, Aaron Neville crooned "Were You There?" in between the readings. He wasn't actually in our church (I wish!) but our priest played a recording narrated by Father Jeff Bayhi with Aaron's sweet voice singing in between.

I enjoyed it so much, I searched and found this little 3-minute clip to share with you. Just one of the fourteen stations. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. 

 

 And now for a few more of my Sweet!s from the past week...

Monday: the sound of a running creek at the bend in the road; a tip on a writing gig from a friend; an afternoon hunting fossils with your husband

Tuesday: ponds filling with water; arriving in Houston just ahead of highway-clogging traffic; laughter blending with tears

 

Wednesday: supporting your friends and loved ones in times of heartbreak and grief; treasured time with your parents, sister, and cousins; talking to a rooster and a chicken in a parking lot; warm days that turn into soft evenings; reminders to not waste a single moment of your life 

Thursday: prayers answered in the way you were hoping for;  your blog chosen as one of five finalists in About.com's Favorite Friendship Blog contest; your friends voting for your blog; witnessing a sunset that kissed the entire sky

 Friday: eavesdropping on a conversation between the wind and the treetops; a "Happy Friday" email from your son; time for reflection and Aaron Neville singing "Were You There?"; movie night at home with your sweetie

Saturday: dinner and board games with friends; Siamese cats; making it home safe and sound when your car is dripping oil; a friend who wants a text letting her know you made it home safe and sound

 

 

Sunday: vineyards in winter; your husband fixing your car, bringing it out to you at work (and driving his back home); the smell of warm foccacia bread; red chili chocolate cake, especially when you're starving; the support you get from a writing critique group

What were some of your sweet! moments this past week? Please share! (If you wrote a post, you can share the link in the comments.)

Hope this week is full of sweet moments for you!

Seasons and Promises

Today I'm driving to Houston. My cousin died a few days ago and I want to be there for his funeral tomorrow, Ash Wednesday.

Ronnie was only 64. Not old, but not young, either. I guess "just enough time", as the Band Perry sings... but I can't imagine ever thinking I've had enough time.

I'd prefer not to be going to Ronnie's funeral tomorrow, although what better way to remind us of our mortality as we enter this season of Lent than to have someone we love and care about die?

As I prepared for my trip this morning, I got word that a dear friend's husband died suddenly yesterday. For the past two years they've lived in separate countries, longing for the day when she could join him in Spain and they'd finally be together longer than too-short visits that passed oh, so quickly. 

Just over a month ago, that day finally came. And now, just like that, he's gone. 

I'm grateful they were together, that there wasn't still an ocean separating them when he died, but my heart breaks for her as all of their hopes and plans and dreams for the future turn to ashes.

That's the thing about life. We can make all kinds of plans and dream all kinds of dreams, but there's no guarantee any of them will come true. 

Should we stop planning? Stop dreaming?

Heck no. Even if we can't control what happens in our lives, we can control how we react to the unexpected. We can still try to make the most of each moment we're given, even if it we feel there's never enough time. We can try to embrace the lessons in our tears as much as those in our laughter. 

I came across a wonderful reminder of this on Beth's blog yesterday in the video below. I felt it was too powerful a story not to share. 

 

I haven't made my Lenten promise yet, but I have a feeling it will have something to do with my answer to the question below...

"What is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?"

~ Mary Oliver

How would you answer that question?

Please join me in praying for peace and strength for these and others who have recently lost loved ones, including my high school classmate, Tanya, whose husband died today.

My Prayer Bowl Overfloweth

 

 

A friend's husband, my own former co-worker and friend, died earlier this week. Just in the past month or so another friend lost his mother, a classmate's husband succumbed to cancer, and I learned of the death of another friend (along with my good intentions to see her again here on earth.)  

There are others... many I can't think of right now. 

Perhaps it's the stage of life I'm in, this middle zone between parents and children, on the cusp of "old age". Perhaps I'm just becoming more aware of the heartaches around me, thanks to online connections and communication.

Whatever it is, there are too many in too short of a time... too many cases of cancer, too many surgeries, too many sons and daughters facing crisis, too many out of work, too many ailing parents and siblings and friends. Too many.

Too many for me to keep them all in my head every day, every minute, along with my own personal prayers.

My mind is on overload. 

Hence, the prayer bowl above, an idea I got from a religious education workshop years ago. I scribble each new name, worry or heartache onto a strip of scrap paper, fold it into thirds and drop it on top of the growing pile, offering the whole bunch up in prayer. 

When it becomes full, as it will too quickly, I'll toss the bits of paper onto a fire. The prayers will float to heaven and become one with the earth, simultaneously.

Fifty two years ago the beautiful milk glass vase held flowers for my mother and her new baby (me) sent with love from her Sunday School class... a symbol of their prayers.

Now it holds those tiny strips of paper, folded gently around prayers of my heart, all of them lifted up to God with faith that he'll take care of them all, every single one, according to his plan.  

Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

~ Philippians 4:6,7

 

 

 

 

Kids, Jewelry, Birthdays, Weddings and other (belated) Sweet!s

A rumble of thunder and whisper of rain woke me in the night. It continues today, another steady, soaking rain falling from a colorless sky. We've had enough rain in the past few weeks that I almost take it for granted, despite the months of drought.

Almost, but not quite. Waking to the sound of rain is still a sweet sound, especially when I can roll over, snuggle deeper into my covers, and go back to sleep.

I would also almost start complaining about the soggy weather... the mud that gets tracked in, the slippery roads... despite those months of drought, but in between our frequent rainy days, we've had warm days with crisp blue skies (Saturday) and cool days with skies of rainless clouds (yesterday.)

I love it when things balance out that way! Very sweet!

Yes, I realize I'm running late with this post. I've been keeping up with my sweet!s this week... but my photos, not so much.

Well, I've been taking plenty, but all of them from the past week were still stashed on my camera until last night. I didn't have a chance until now to tidy my sweet! list and glance through my photos - it was one of those on-the-run weekends that I love, but that leave me breathless!

First, Daniel came home for a visit this weekend. His face is always a sweet sight, but I hadn't seen him since last year, when he moved out to his own place just after Christmas!

So you can imagine how happy I was to see him!

We spent Friday evening talking and watching a movie, just hanging out and relaxing. I was hosting my own Silpada jewelry party (one of my other "hats") the next afternoon, but thought I would have plenty of time Saturday morning to get everything done.

But after letting myself sleep in and then mentally comparing what I had left to do with how much time I had in which to do it, I realized I was wrong!

My kids were lifesavers, though, bless them... they pitched in and helped me pack up the last of our Christmas decorations away, tidy up the house in preparation and followed whatever other orders I barked at them. Such sweet kids!

Consequently, it was a relaxed open house. And what a great way to spend a Saturday afternoon... sitting around a table, sipping wine, munching on yummy snacks, talking to friends and looking at beautiful jewelry!

Tom and I headed out right after the party to help my dear friend Darla celebrate her birthday at Z'Tejas. (It was my first time there, and oh my gosh, it was soooo good! Great twists on traditional Tex Mex... I got the Wild Mushroom Enchiladas.)

(Again, my kids were lifesavers... they helped clean up from the party for me! I just hope Daniel will come home again some day... I don't think he was counting on all the extra chores!) 

Just getting together with these longtime friends from high school is a sweet way to spend a Saturday night, but we were joined by a face none of us had seen since graduation day. We reconnected with Wayne via Facebook and discovered he'd been living in the Austin area for the past fifteen years or so, too. We've probably passed him on the highway a zillion times...

After church Sunday morning, I met my future daughter-in-law in town for another day of wedding venue sightseeing. There are so many possibilities, it's mind-boggling! I'm glad I'm just a tag along and not the one having to make the decision!

I can have fun snapping photos...

And now for my belated list of Sweet! moments from the past week...

Monday: walking at sunrise; checking out wedding venues with your son, his future bride and her family (photos HERE and HERE); one of your blog posts listed on Pioneer Woman's sidebar links

Tuesday: frost sparkling in the caliche road like tiny diamonds; working on your book for hours, even if it doesn't feel like you made much progress

Wednesday: almost getting caught up on your email; a friend pinning a link to your blog on Pinterest; not burning the chicken legs on the grill even though you were distracted with writing; catching a movie with friends; extra-sweet... the movie starred George Clooney and was set in Hawaii ("The Descendants")

Thursday: the excitement and joy of puppies on a morning walk; words flowing onto the page without effort, for a change; a phone call from your sister; your kids helping you take down the Christmas decorations

Friday: fresh morning sunlight; bumping into a friend at the grocery store; the Epiphany; photos of your husband's aunt ziplining in Costa Rica in honor of her 74th birthday!; the sight of your middle son for the first time in two weeks

Saturday: your kids pitching in to get your house ready for your jewelry party; finding out one of your photos was chosen for FlickR's Explore; friends gathered around your table, chatting; a friend putting in an order for jewelry even though she sells it herself, just in hopes you have a good party; celebrating a dear friend's birthday and reconnecting with a friend from long ago

Sunday: kneeling and praying next to your sweetie in church; checking out more wedding venues with your future daughter-in-law; hearing from your oldest, letting you know he made it safely to Arizona for a business trip

(Monday: I didn't plan to add Monday on here, but first thing this morning, I received a message from a friend I've been praying for that he's met 'someone'. It made me smile, inside and out, so I had to add it here.)

I hope you had tons of sweet moments this past week, too. I confess, there are days when I have to think really hard to find one, but I always manage to... and often it triggers recollection of a few more. If you haven't tried it yet, I encourage you to!

 

A Message From Myself Out of the Past

Epiphany (-nies)

Knotted muscle in my neck...can't quite catch my breath...geez, it's only Jan. 4 and I'm already stressing about how to get everything accomplished that I want to do this year! I wish I could resolve to have an extra six hours each day - that would help! Twenty-four doesn't seem to be nearly enough.

But, of course, I can't. None of us can. We just have to stumble along and do the best we can and try not to worry about the minutes we drop along the way. Just keep facing forward, or, as this Japanese proverb reminds us...

 "If you look up, there are no limits."

For me, this means that God will give me the time, strength and whatever other resources I need (money, patience, determination, health...) to do what he needs me to do. And nothing else really matters.

That's so much easier to say than to accept, though.

This morning I rose at 5am...the first time in more than a week I've been up before the sun. Even though I hate that first jolt of the alarm clock and long to jump back under the covers just a little while longer, I love getting so much done before the sun rises. I love walking the critters under a fresh morning sky, watching the world wake up. I feel invigorated...hopeful...ready to embrace the day. I wish morning could last all day!

It helped that we celebrated the Epiphany at Mass yesterday - the visit of the Magi to the baby Jesus. The theme...the key word to remember...the word and image I took away from the service was LIGHT.

Light as in guidance...the star that led them to Jesus; light as in understanding...they recognized Jesus was a king, the son of God; light as in revelation...they revealed to us that Jesus came for all people, all nations, all races.

So each day I will focus on that light. His light. I'll imagine it as the fresh morning light, stretching over the world as the sun rises. I'll pray that it shines outward, leading me along the right path and helping me have greater understanding and compassion...I'll pray that it shines inward upon myself, revealing my faults...those areas that I most need to work on. I'll pray that I have his light within me and that others can see it. And then I'll take a deep breath and try not to worry about anything more.

A massage sure sounds nice right now, though...

"If you look up, there are no limits."

 

 

Glancing through January posts from the past few years, I came across the one above. It was just what I needed to hear.

Ironic that it came from myself, isn't it?

I decided to repost it and not just because yesterday was Epiphany...

...Perhaps it's just what someone else needs to hear right now, too.

'F' Words for 2012

In 2011, my thoughts ran wild like mustangs, my energy scattered into all different directions trying to chase them down.

True, creativity needs space and the freedom to run wild for a bit, to stretch its legs and grow strong... but if those thoughts scatter too far in too many directions... if they never return to the corral, never get reined in, never learn to work as a team... well, they're not good for anything but looking or sounding pretty.

I need more than that this year. 

{Prepare yourself... here come my 'F' words...}

In 2012, I'm going to put up Fences to structure my time... I'm going to corral those thoughts and Focus on one project at a time so I can experience Finishing something. 

I bet that's an amazing feeling.

My other 'F' words for 2012... Faith, Fitness, Friendship, Frugality and Financial Freedom. 

Oh, and Forgiveness... another awesome 'F' word...

"Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you." ~ Ephesians 4:31-32 

What about you? 

 Do you have a Theme,Word or Resolution for 2012? 

 

 

Peanut Butter/Chocolate Bars, a Snow-Squeaky Beach and other Sweet!s of the Week

Wednesday evening I spent an hour sitting at my in-law's dining room table working on a post to update you on our Florida week. I just had one more image to add before I hit 'publish' when Tom's laptop froze on me. As a last ditch effort, I refreshed the page.

Poof! My post vanished! 

Sigh. 

Of course, it was a brilliant post - one of my best ever! Ahem. But I decided playing cards, exploring thrift stores and walking on the beach were more important than trying to remember what I'd written, and I procrastinated re-writing it until now, after a twelve-hour drive home and lugging in all of our suitcases and before starting the laundry.

I'm sure you understand. 

I do recall that Nobel-worthy post had something to do with eating lots of peanut butter and chocolate. In my mother-in-law's kitchen there were these cute little Christmas plates that magically filled with all kinds of cookies overnight. Tom and I did our best to eat them up every day but then, the next morning, it would be overflowing in sweet yummy goodies all over again!

It was so weird!

Christmas magic, I'm sure.

We did more than eat peanut butter and chocolate, though; we played lots of cards... mostly 3-13, a kind of rummy. Tom and his family also play cribbage, but they're so fast at it I'd rather just sit and watch in awe.

One of Tom's eight brothers, Joe, lives near his parents; he and his wife Erin used to live in Texas and we've always had a great time with them. On this trip we trekked through antique/junk shops and along the beach, searching for all different kinds of treasure. We also spent one evening catching up over margaritas and 3-13 (they stomped us!)

Martha Stewart has nothing on Mom and Erin when it comes to Christmas decor. I came home totally inspired to finish my tree and create a beautiful table setting. Both of their houses twinkle in Christmas spirit.

Friday, our last day there, Mom had planned to take us to the infamous McGuires Irish Pub right after Pop had a small test run. Unfortunately, we ended up eating in a hospital cafeteria instead of McGuires. (Barbecued ribs, since you asked. And they were pretty dang good!)

Pop didn't even get any lunch... unless you call the stuff that drips through an IV "lunch".

You see, over the last few years - more frequently in the past few months - Pop has been getting anemic. So anemic that he requires transfusions. On Friday the doctor felt his blood count was low enough that he needed another recharge.

I'm glad Tom and I were able to be there to help them out, at least for a day. And we still had fun with them, playing cards and listening to Pop flirt with the nurses (that old rascal!)

As I write this, he's still in the hospital. We're praying the doctors can figure out why he keeps getting anemic and what to do about it. Please join me! (Thank you!)

And now for my sweet! moments of the week... 

Sunday: your parents-in-law's faces on a long overdue visit; playing 3-13 even if you lose every game; a tree covered in angel ornaments; chocolate and peanut butter bars

Monday: chocolate and peanut butter bars; chocolate and peanut butter bars; chocolate and peanut butter bars; laughing with your brother- and sister-in-law over margaritas and games of 3-13 (even if they always win)

Tuesday: chocolate and peanut butter bars; Tums; running with your sweetie so you can eat more chocolate and peanut butter bars; swingsets sturdy enough for adults; an evening penitential service in a beautiful church

Wednesday: exploring thrift/antique/junk shops with your sweetie, brother- and sister-in-law; Victorian houses draped in Christmas

Thursday: walking on a deserted Pensacola beach with loved ones, searching for shells; your heels sinking deep into squeaky snow white sand; wearing a swimsuit in December; purple beach flowers; finally winning a game of 3-13!

Friday: spending a day laughing and playing cards with your in-laws, even if most of it is spent in the hospital; old globes; watching old episodes of MASH, Taxi, Gomer Pyle, Petticoat Junction...

Saturday: starting off on time for your return trip home; a pre-dawn deserted interstate; sharing a footlong turkey sandwich with your sweetie; your tail-wagging, grinning puppies greeting you when you arrive back home after a week away; the sight of 2/3 of your kids after a long absence; your son helping you out when you're feeling frustrated and exhausted; three paychecks in the mail

Sugar Frosted Mornings and other Sweet!s

I stepped out into a frosted world... even the tops of the cedars sparkled in the first rays of morning light peeking into the Hollow.

The frozen mud crunched with each footstep. Like a tourist with their first glimpse of the Grand Canyon, I snapped photo after photo of crystal-crusted oak leaves, flowers, blades of grass, juniper berries,bits of dried wood and mud...

I've barely looked at my photos, though... Tom and I are headed to Florida to visit his parents, leaving our capable kids to take care of the house and dogs, and I've had too many stray to-do's I needed to round up before leaving.

I fell into a funk earlier this week, much like the fog that replaced those sparkling frosty mornings. Too much stress, too little sleep, worries over families or friends or finances... who knows what pulled me into that internal fog, but I took my own advice, counted my blessings, prayed, and just marched on ahead, knowing a clear blue sky waited just behind the cloud. 

It helped when I read these lines on The Blue Muse...

Whatever the reason, I feel calm and centered and as if I am basking in the glow of something wonderful.

I think I’ll wrap a bit of this glow up in a big old box, tie it with a very old, very pretty ribbon, and send it out to the world.

When it comes your way, I hope you’ll open it, take a big deep breath, and then send it back out with a smile.

Her words were my deep breath; when I exhaled, I could feel the shift back to center inside and the glow of the something wonderful she spoke of. I'm sending it back out, now, with a smile, in case there's someone else who needs that light.

I finally began decorating the house for Christmas Friday, memories spilling out of the boxes with each Santa or snowman I unpacked. In the past few years I've held back, only pulling out a fraction of my decorations, but this year I'm setting out every Christmas beany baby, every spray-painted glitter-sprinkled pine cone "tree", every crocheted Santa kiss and snowflake and angel, every ceramic fundraiser Nativity scene...

So now my house is splashed in Christmas kitsch and I love it. It wraps around me like a worn warm quilt I once thought of tossing out but now can't bear to part with.

I sit here now in a quiet house, after a day at work and then two Christmas parties... gatherings with dear friends I don't see often enough... trying to finish this post I started days ago. Beds are filled with people near to my heart, worn out from the week or maybe from dancing, but I'm still wide awake, savoring the sweetness... 

Sunday: receiving a blessing from your congregation; dancing a waltz, the Cotton-Eyed Joe, the Schottisch and the Twist, all in one night; Rudy's barbecue 

Monday: gratitude on your puppies' faces for letting them sleep inside on a cold, wet night 

Tuesday: homemade pizza; a Christmas party at a winery

Wednesday: frosty mornings; finally getting caught up on a week's worth of emails

Thursday: the first touch of the sun on autumn leaves; hamburgers grilled by your son; a surprise ornament from a friend waiting for you in the mailbox; visiting with friends in the church parking lot

Friday: morning fog gathered in a hollow; your neighbor's dog, recovering from being hit by a truck, actually running again... or at least trying to; keeping promises; your son helping you unpack Christmas and drape it around the house

Saturday: a walk with your puppies and sweetie before heading off to work; a customer taking the time to sing your praises to your supervisor; celebrating the season by gathering with friends and dancing in an airplane hangar; hugging 2/3 of your kids

Belated Sweet: your sister giving you the teapot your grandmother used almost every day for 60 years or so 

Wishing you a week full of sweet! moments!

A Birthday, a Graduation and Texas Heaven...

We let Max sleep inside the past two nights. Belle, too, of course, although it was more for Max's sake than hers. They have a large dog house, nestled up against the house and the hill, protected from the elements, but even though temperatures were just in the low forties Sunday night, it was bone-chilling damp and he's an old dog with sore joints.

So I found an old comforter and Daniel spread it in on the floor of the laundry room. Comfy cozy and warm.

Then yesterday morning I discovered Max isn't the only one with old achy, slow-moving bones and joints. The winter chill seems to be affecting my computer, too! (You thought I was going to say it was me, didn't you?)

Tom asked me to scan and email him some documents for our health insurance... would you believe it took me over 40 minutes to scan three photos!

Forty minutes to scan 3 photos!!

My old computer was moving so slow I knew I had to do something, so instead of finishing up the editing of my last photo shoot, as I'd planned, plus catching up on my blog reading, blog writing, book writing, personal history transcribing, etc. etc, I went down the list of installed programs, files and folders with a virtual pair of scissors, Googling the ones I wasn't sure about and getting rid of everything I didn't absolutely need.

Six hours and a couple of defrags later, I gained 3% of my free space back. It was still as slow as ever, but I still felt like I had accomplished something, like that feeling you get when you finally clean out your kitchen junk drawer.

You know, if you keep a computer long enough, and your entire family uses it, it essentially does resemble a junk drawer or storage closet... a repository of all kinds of odds and ends no one needs or uses anymore.

Anyway, I also finished up the editing of my last photo shoot and emailed them to my friend/client so she could get her Christmas cards ordered, although I had to stay up really late to finish it. It was worth it just to help her out... and also for that awesome feeling of finishing something!

It's a rare thing for me; I hope to get more acquainted with it!

The only thing I accomplished this past weekend was spending lots of time with friends and family... even though it means I'm behind on everything else, it was another awesome feeling! 

First came the celebration of my first baby Tommy's 26th birthday. It was just like his birthday parties in the old days: lots of pizza... ice cream cake... singing Happy Birthday off-key... kids sleeping over, staying up all night playing video games and watching movies...

...except this time the "kids" were drinking wine and beer, not just soda. My how time flies!

Me and my sweet boy.

After working at the Bistro Saturday, I rushed home, changed clothes and met Daniel and Tom downtown for Daniel's friend Austin's graduation from UT...

Here, let me zoom in a little more.

See how happy he is?

Afterwards, we joined Austin's parents and some of the boys' friends at Asti (above) for a scrumptious Italian dinner. We arrived a little early, so I filled the time strolling down the street, snapping photos.

Look, someone knitted scarfs for the street posts! (To see more of these scarves, plus other night street scenes, go HERE.)

 

 

Sunday night Tom and I went to our church Christmas party. I look forward to it every year... we get yummy Rudy's Bar-B-Q and a wide open dance floor.

My idea of Texas heaven!

With the busy weekend, I neglected to check and charge my camera battery before we left. Of course it died before I could get any photos of the great dancers, but I did manage to get this one.

I want one of these shirts!

I smudged their name tags to protect the innocent. (You're welcome, Joan and Sherry!)

It was a wonderful weekend, and I think I appreciated it even more because through it all I was praying for a friend who underwent surgery for cancer on Friday, a friend who lost his mother on Saturday, a high school classmate who died on Friday, and fellow parishioners who rushed from the Christmas party Sunday evening when they got word their house was on fire. It burned to the ground; they didn't just lose all of their belongings, but also their dog. Just breaks my heart. Please say a prayer for each of them.

So I hope you had a wonderful weekend, too... but mostly I hope you didn't take a single second of it for granted. 

In the Clearing

Standing in the clearing, just standing there breathing and listening to bird song and puppy scuffles, I feel them sprouting in my head, fed by the sunshine and fresh air and stillness.

So many thoughts popping up... brilliant, original thoughts blossoming like beautiful flowers never before seen by anyone. I gather them into a bouquet to share with you, but by the time I get home, words like petals have drifted away from me, lost forever, and I'm left holding only wilted, spent blooms.

Perhaps that's all they were to begin with. They just looked more beautiful in the sunshine.

One thought lingered this morning, though... not quite as splendid as it seemed in the clearing, but a hint of color remained...

It was actually an image that popped in my head of a child walking along, gazing in wonder at the world, feeling safe and oblivious to danger because she held her father's hand. She was free to watch the sun paint treetops golden and patches of blue sky break through orange-tipped morning clouds because he guided her steps and protected her.

Lately lots of little things have tried to sneak onto my shoulders. Nothing big and in-your-face that rev up your adrenaline, but just little ones that drain your strength... worries about friends and family and finances, mostly.

But as soon as that image popped up, I felt the weight fly away; I knew I was that child holding God's hand as I walked through the clearing. Just as I held tight to my children's hands, took care of them, guided them, protected them, he does the same to me, allowing me to wander and enjoy the flowers, the sky, the sunrise and sunset.

Others are struggling with much weightier issues than I am. At times I'm ashamed of my weakness and amazed at their strength, but this morning I gave thanks for my weakness that sends me scurrying early on for the strength and tenderness in God's hand. 

 

Just popping in...

...to say thanks for the prayers for Max.

This morning he didn't just use all of his legs on our walk, but even trotted a little and played with Belle, pouncing and prancing and twirling so she couldn't bite his ankles (her favorite move.)

I believe in the power of prayer and I know those you offered made a huge difference. Max's days are numbered, I realize that. There will come a morning, sooner than I'd like, when he's worse, rather than better, and the day after even worse than before.

But I'm grateful today wasn't that day. I'm sure Max and Belle are grateful, too, so thank you from all of us.

My reflective mood continues, which I guess is a good thing since we're now in Advent. Tonight I'm going to Vespers for the first time - it sounds reflective so I'm looking forward to it, except for the smell of burning incense, which I'm sure will be hanging heavy in the air. (Funny how I burned incense all the time as a teenager but now I don't care for it!)

This past week many bloggers posted about gratitude. A video posted by Gail at Louisiana Belle reminded me to watch for the wonders of each day, to remember each one is a gift to live like it was your first and your last. That way you cover all your bases. (Click here to hop over to Gail's to see it. It's almost 10 minutes long and features some beautiful time-lapsed photography, but if you don't have that much time, start it at minute 5:20.)

I can't remember if I've posted here about the photography business that has dropped into my lap out of the blue, but I finally shared some of the photos from my first shoot, as well as lessons I've learned, on my photography blog HERE. I got lucky - great models and perfect weather. (Thank you Candace, Cornell and God!)

The photo below seems to be the hands down favorite. 

Now I'm off to Vespers... (I just love the way that sounds!)

Hope you have a wonderful evening!

 

 

 

Summer, a fading memory

A splash of light from my iPhone guided me through the dark to my car last night. The wedding guests were long gone and only one light glowed in the winery Bistro behind me. 

Pausing in a clearing, I gazed up at the stars crowded around a sliver of moon. My frosty breath rose to greet them, along with a regret of never learning the constellations beyond the Big and Little Dippers. 

Frost coated the windshield of my car, although it wasn't even midnight. I dug my community college ID from my purse - it's good for scraping ice but not much else these days - and wished I had my gloves.

My headlights cut through the darkness on the winding road leading home through the hills. I seemed to be the only person out driving. Tom had left the porch lights on for me, a welcome sight, and Belle greeted me near the road, but inside, the house was silent; everyone was already snug in bed.

I turned off the lights and snuggled under the covers myself, not even thinking one thought about my poor plants, the aloe and bougainvillea I'd faithfully watered all summer, trying to help them survive the drought.

This morning I feared I'd find nothing but wilted, frozen leaves, but the aloe was still fresh and green, and fuchsia blossoms still dotted the bougainvillea. The rock wall where they're nestled must have retained enough afternoon sunshine to protect them through the cold night.

Max, on the other hand... that poor puppy can barely stand on his dysplasia-cursed elbow. I guess the cold gets to him like it gets to the rest of us feeling our age in our joints.

He was determined to join me and Belle on our morning walk, though. His face fell when I suggested he 'stay', so I said come on, then. He hopped along mostly on three legs, but his face shone, he was so eager and happy to hit the road.

Belle and I walked slow, following his pace for the most part. A few times he found a soft spot in the woods where he'd lie down and rest.

His appetite was down again this morning, too - I hand fed him a few pieces where I'd hidden his aspirin and he readily took it from my hand, as well as his glucosamine supplements, but otherwise had no interest. Belle seems to be on a sympathy hunger strike - her bowl is untouched and I refuse to hand feed her!

So the bowls are back on the kitchen counter. I'll try again later... maybe with a few pieces of cheese or some other goody in there. No more hand feeding, but I have no qualms against bribery.

Meanwhile, here it is a cold but sunshine-filled Monday and the week ahead is going to fly by, faster than usual, I believe. I'm going to be wearing a dozen different hats, trying hard to give each a fair share of my time without stressing over any of them too much, or spending hours hatless from indecision about which to wear next.

I'm grateful for each one and that's what I'm going to (try to) keep in mind. 

I hope all of you have a beautiful, busy, fulfilling, love-filled and peaceful week!

(And if you have a minute, please say a little prayer for my Max. Thank you!)

 

The Glad Game

My sweet sister, the very one who is still recovering from hip surgery and lives daily with Parkinson's, found out this week she has glaucoma. To treat it and save her eyesight, she'll need to put drops in her eyes every day for the rest of her life.

Listen to what she told me about it: "I read that if you have blue or green eyes, the drops might turn your eyes brown! I've always wanted brown eyes! And another side effect is that it will turn your eyelashes dark and thick. So now I'll have beautiful dark eyes!"

That's my sister.

She lives her life playing "The Glad Game". Like Pollyanna, (which we call her!) she is always able to find something good in every situation.

It took awhile, but her optimistic attitude finally started rubbing off on me, and oh my gosh, what a relief it is to recognize those blessings that are tucked into bad news.  

Playing the Glad Game isn't just about helping ourselves get through tough times, though. The best thing about it is how your joy and gratitude is contagious. It might be just the inspiration - the shining light - someone else needs to find their way out of personal darkness... pain, illness, loss of a loved one, discouragement, anger, financial problems...

There's so much potential darkness in this world trying to blind us to all that we have to be grateful for.

"...give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for us in Christ Jesus." 1 Thess. 5:18

I remember groaning when I read Corrie Ten Boom's description of the flea infestation in the concentration camp bunkroom, enough to turn their skin black when they entered the area to sleep, and I agreed with her that there was nothing about fleas to be grateful for. But urged by her sister Betsy (another Pollyanna-type, obviously), Corrie reluctantly told God thank you for the fleas.

When I read a little further how she realized it was because of the fleas that the guards wouldn't step foot in the bunkroom, allowing them freedom to hold prayer sessions and Bible readings and comfort each other through those dark days, a little light went on in my mind.

I'm grateful I was able to read their story - I'm grateful for that little light that now reminds me how, when something bad happens (and there are bad things - those fleas were bad!) God can squeeze something good out of the worst of things.

I'm reminded to give thanks in all circumstances, even if, like Corrie with the fleas, I'm not sure exactly why.

I'm still not as good with the Glad Game as my sister is, but I promise to keep practicing. I hope you'll play along. I think you'll like it.

Hope you have a blessed Thanksgiving!

 

Tuesday's Storm

Nature is holding its breath. Not a leaf twitches.

Trees crowd the hill leading up from the creek bed and stare at the slate sky.  Frozen in place, they wait - hope - for the promised storm, banners lifted high... some fresh and green, others rusting, faded by the summer sun and heat.

Their quiet pleading works. First, a soft rumbling, then a flash of light. Rain begins to fall, soft, a whisper on the roof.

The trees stand as still as those in an autumn painting, perhaps afraid they'll scare it away, this gentle storm tiptoeing into the Hollow. 

Slate turns to steel. More confident now, the storm moves with bold steps; the whisper becomes a roar, pouring blessings. Nothing flashy, no lightshows, no angry thunder, just soothing strength.

Banners begin to wave, trees dance in gratitude. 

I step outside, breathe in deep the cool freshness, and remember God's promises.

By your grace, O God.

~Emmanuel D'Alzon

 

 

"It was the thing to do..." (Thank you, Veterans!)

"Lord, if your people need me, I will not refuse the work. Your will be done."

~St. Martin of Tours

 

 

My big brother Buster was headed to Viet Nam, saying his goodbyes, when I stood beside him in this photograph and smiled. I had no idea what was ahead of him. This was probably taken before his first tour of duty and so he had only a vague idea himself what to expect.

When he volunteered for his second tour, however, he knew full well what he was stepping into...but he did it anyway. 

 

 

My dad was in high school when the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor. He joined the Navy soon after high school graduation because his country was at war and "it was the thing to do." In the next twenty-two months he traveled a long way from Texas aboard the U.S.S. Geneva...to places like the Philippines, the Marshall Islands, China, Burma, Japan.

Before he turned twenty, he had seen cities that had been destroyed by war and piles of dead bodies waiting to be buried. 

A few years later, his little brother Bobby followed his lead and joined the Navy, and many years later, so did my brother Donnie and two nephews.

 

Pop, my wonderful father-in-law, missed out on World War II, but joined the Air Force in time for the Korean War. He worked base supply in Okinawa, supporting bombers flying missions to Korea...about 100 aircraft every day.

He re-enlisted, got married, and hopped around the globe...living in England, Germany, and over a year in Pakistan, separated from his family (the other heroes - Mom had 8 teenage and younger boys to deal with by herself!)...visiting a dozen other countries...eventually staying put for awhile in Maryland, working with NSA (and a second job at the bowling alley to make ends meet), until his retirement.

A lifetime of service and sacrifice for this country.

 

 

My husband Tom was raised in a military family. For him it was normal to move every few years to someplace completely different...by the time he was eight or nine years old, he had lived in three countries!

He grew up on a tight budget - hand-me-downs, powdered milk and only two cookies a day...period! And yet as soon as he could he joined the service...the Coast Guard. Among other things, he helped rescue fisherman off the coast of Alaska.

Four of his brothers also joined the service (three career Air Force, just like their dad, and another Coast Guard) and the youngest joined the Army Reserves. Now the next generation is following in their footsteps: two Air Force and one Coast Guard...and even marrying other service members!

I think it's very fitting that Veterans Day shares November with Thanksgiving, a day when we slow down to remember and be grateful for things that we usually take for granted, because veterans, despite the sacrifices they make for all of us, probably don't even make it onto our Thanksgiving thank-you list.

That's how much most of us take them for granted - as well as the freedoms they protect for us. Even when our country isn't at war, they go where they are needed to unfamiliar places, away from extended family, often living on a minimum salary. To many, they are a symbol of war, not peace, and sadly become targets of derision, scorn, blame... and even violence, like the sad incident at Ft. Hood a few years ago.

They deserve to be thanked every day of the year. A friend of mine says that when he's in a restaurant and sees a man or woman in uniform, he secretly pays their bill. What a wonderful idea! I think more of us should go out of our way every day to show our appreciation, but I'm glad there is at least one special day where we shine a spotlight on them, remember their sacrifices and make clear our gratitude.

Thank you Daddy, Tom, Pop, Buster, Donnie, Uncle Bobby, Uncle Howard, Kenny, Steve, Joe, Robbie, John, Sheila, Michael, Tom, Lynn, Robbin, Evan...and all of the other Veterans, past and present, out there! Because of you, we're free to go about our daily lives, without a thought in the world to how much that freedom costs.

But let's hope we do remember the price, as well as those who, through their actions, say "Don't worry. I got this."

(If this sounds familiar, it's a re-post from last year and the year before, with just a few tweeks.)

 

On November (and my Sweet! Report)

Today is the fifth of November. How can that be?

Does anyone else feel the swoosh of time flying by?  If I'm not careful, with just a blink it will be December Eve.

November is full of writing challenges - novel writing, nonfiction writing, blogging...

Why? Who decided this was a month to focus on writing? A month dotted with important holidays in between two other big holiday months... a month of beautiful weather that begs you to drop your pen or leave your keyboard to come outside and soak it up (at least here in Austin.)

I won't be joining any challenges. Well, okay, maybe the blogging one because blogging is therapy... plus there are prizes, and I love prizes. I'll spend a few hours a week on my book, but I won't log the hours or daily words anywhere. The encouragement from other writers would be great, but right now, that's just extra time spent away from writing.

And every minute is gold right now. Yesterday morning, like a curious puppy on a leash, my brain dashed forward through the days of this month and all of the exciting events - visiting friends, celebrating my mother's 80th birthday, Thanksgiving - then I remembered the everyday demands, like editing photos from my first-ever paid photo shoot, writing, transcribing... laundry, groceries, bill-paying... morning walks, dog duties, working out...

How am I going to fit it all in?

Right away, I pushed the retract button on the leash, reeled in that frisky puppy-thought and made up my mind to keep it on a tight leash, allowing myself to stand in just one square of this month at a time as much as possible. I want to appreciate each day, accomplish what I can and not stress about the rest. (Why am I always having to remind myself of this?)

Already this month I waved my son off on his first post-graduation job, attended Mass in honor of All Saints Day, and said extra prayers for the souls of my friends and family who have passed on in honor of All Soul's Day. I came across these quotes and started writing a post including them, but ran out of time.

But they're great, so I'll still share them with you...

God creates out of nothing. … but He does what is still more wonderful: He makes saints out of sinners.~ Søren Kierkegaard

Ordinary riches can be stolen, real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you.~ Oscar Wilde

 

I've also survived my first paid photo shoot gig (from what I've seen of the photos, I think it was a success!) and helped ease a friend into a new decade of life with a surprise celebration of his 60th birthday. 

(As promised, Dan!)

And at the moment this post is published, Tom and I will be off visiting dear friends.

{Last night (Friday) we enjoyed (I'm sure!) listening to their son's band play, and today (Saturday) we're either off exploring garage sales and flea markets or, if we're too tired from last night, we're just hanging out on the back porch. Either way, we're having fun!}

It's only the fifth of November, but the rest of the month promises to be just as packed. I'm determined to savor each day, slowly and deliciously, as if it came from a box of assorted rich chocolates. 

Because these days of our lives are precious, aren't they?

And now on to the rest of my sweet moments from this past week... Hope your week was filled with them, too!

Saturday: a surprise visit from a friend at the Bistro; winning a coin toss; autumn days in a vineyard; home from work early enough to watch a movie with your sweetie

Sunday: catching up with a dear friend after church; sharing a yummy cheesesteak sandwich with the one you love; five minutes with, and a hug from, your oldest, on his way from Dallas to San Antonio; cleaning house while listening to The Best of U2, 1990 to 2000 and the Beatles #1 hits 

Monday: Haley, the neighbor puppy who was hit by a truck just a few weeks ago, joining you and your puppies for your morning walk; making a little headway on learning Photoshop Elements

Tuesday: seeing your son off on his first day of a new job; support and advice from photographer friends; almost forgetting, but then arriving early for All Saint's Day Mass

Wednesday: cotton candy clouds; meeting Fancy, a leggy Doberman puppy; surviving your first ever 'real' photo shoot; a call from your sister; a now-routine weekly lunch with wonderful friends; helping a friend celebrate his 60th birthday (and spending time with friends you never get to see anymore) 

Thursday: seeing your "baby" girl; homemade chili on a chilly night; laughing with your son at the Modern Family episode you missed via Hulu

Friday: joining other bloggers worldwide for the Blog Blast for Peace; Belle peering in at the window beside you, in hopes you'll come out and visit; taking a break from the computer and visiting with your wiggly, joyful, full-of-kisses puppy; finding out you won a blog drawing for a cup with a friend's beautiful original artwork on it!

Hope you're having a wonderful weekend. Don't forget...

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." - Robert Brault

P.S. Please keep my father-in-law in your prayers. He had to go into the hospital this week and be given blood for a recurring problem with anemia. So far, they haven't figured out what's causing it. Thank you! 

Dona Nobis Pacem (Blog Blast for Peace 2011)

There is no way to peace. Peace is the way.

~A.J. Muste
Dutch Reverend and Christian Pacifist, 20th century

 

(We owe it to them, don't you think?)

Dona Nobis Pacem

(Grant us Peace.)

Linking up with the 2011 Blog Blast for Peace. Will you join us?

 

...watching it fly away...

Almost every morning for years now I've walked the same mile of rocky, caliche road, up to the bend and back. Some mornings I veer off into the woods or along the creek bed.

The seasons trade places quietly; changes are subtle when you're watching every day. 

This morning I felt the touch of autumn on my bare arms, brushing past in the breeze. I noticed bunches of tiny yellow flowers popping up along the sides of the road... autumn yellow with a touch of gold as opposed to Easter egg or summer sun yellow. Maybe the difference is in my imagination, fed by cooler temperatures and golden autumn light, but for me it's a hint of more changes on the way.

Along this road I've prayed. I've skipped. I've held hands with my sweetie. I've laughed at dogs and a guinea fowl. Many mornings I've cried... only God, the dogs, the birds and trees witnessing my tears. 

My thoughts often wander, ramble, drift away from me on their own adventures. Along this road I can open up my heart, dig around and pull out any troubled thoughts weighing me down. I can imagine tying them onto the tail of a kite, one after another, then letting the string slip from my grasp.

I can imagine watching the breeze catch it and pull it high, high... watching it fly away, my troubled thoughts tumbling along behind, gradually disappearing into the morning clouds... 

First thing in the morning...

...even before my eyes pop open, I pray... giving thanks, asking for guidance, and for the needs of my loved ones.

That done, I stumble to the bathroom, splash water on my face, brush my teeth, "take care of business", and then head to the kitchen and start my coffee brewing.

I need a bit of quiet time over my coffee and cereal to gather my thoughts. I usually read something inspirational while I eat - currently "Hope for Each Day" by Billy Graham. 

As the sun rises, I head outside for a walk with my camera and my puppies, paying attention to God's handiwork and continuing my prayers, asking specifically for strength for whatever the day brings.

So, tell me... What do you do to get your day going on an upbeat, positive note?

Share your answer here and in the comment section of BlogHer's Life Well Lived Blog Post and you'll be entered for a $250 Sweepstakes!

(P.S. If you have trouble feeling upbeat in the morning, you might want to watch the "Happiness Prescription" video by Dr. Aymee... click HERE)

When the Circus Leaves Town (and my week of Sweet!s)

Last night Tom and I split a Subway sandwich for dinner, sitting on the restaurant's deck overlooking what used to be an arm of Lake Travis. Car tracks were visible, cutting right down the middle of the dry, grassy lake bed.

Wanting a closer look, we headed to a nearby park, but we were distracted from our lake quest by a wide field dotted with campers, trailers and trucks. A red one in the middle caught our eye, boasting "Culpepper and Merriweather Circus" in large, white old-fashioned lettering across its paneled side.

Nearby, a few men worked as a team rolling up what we guessed to be the performance tent. Two horses - one "regular" and one "mini" - were tethered near a trailer. Some people walked dogs near another trailer carrying rows of auditiorium-style seating, collapsed and waiting for the next town... the next show. 

I wondered about their lives, how it must be to live on the road, going from one small town to the next. Watching them pack it all up like that was sweet and sad, all at the same time.

(Wouldn't you know, for once I didn't have my camera? I had even left my phone at home!)

 

And now for a few more of my sweet! moments from the past week... 

Sunday: hearing just the words you need to hear at church; encouraging words (and donations) from friends supporting your writing; memories of your big brother

Monday: easily untangling business and computer knots from the night before; morning mist on the hills; taking a baby step forward on your personal history business; listening to your mother's voice telling stories of her life; tips from photographer friends; receiving a text from your middle son that says "I got the job!"

Tuesday: walking early enough to greet the first orange rays of the sun; a rowdy wind playing with your hair; learning new photography tricks from a friend

Wednesday: riding in a truck with the windows rolled down; hearing the caw of a crow and watching it swoop out of the woods and across the road; laughing with your son over snippets of "Community" on Hulu

Thursday: meeting friends for lunch and making plans to do it every week; following the tap-tap-tap of a woodpecker until you find it behind a screen of oak leaves (and getting a few blurry photographs of it); meeting a deadline; chicken and mushroom pizza

Friday: working out to Elvis's "Number 1 Hits" CD; Belle's face peering in the window beside you, reminding you to take breaks from the computer screen to sit on the back step and cuddle with her; a husband who says "That's okay." when you tell him you're not going to make it to the grocery store today (again!); a son who offers to run to the small grocery store for a few things in the meantime; finally finishing your TABC certification; encouraging comments from strangers

Saturday: evening light on a vineyard; splitting a Subway sandwich with your sweetie on a deck as the sun begins to set; taking a walk along the bottom of a dry lake (sweet in the unique-ness... sad in the reality); watching a traveling circus roll up their tents, preparing to head to the next town

Sunday: late Mass (sleeping in!); a phone call from a dear friend you don't talk to often enough; looking forward to an afternoon with your daughter

I also have one belated Sweet! - I can finally announce that my oldest son got the job he was hoping for. Talk about an answered prayer! I couldn't mention it here until he gave notice at his current job. He and his girlfriend will finally live in the same town for the first time in their five-year relationship. 

I hope you've had a week full of sweet! moments!I've found that, even on the toughest days, if I look really close and think hard about it, I can find at least one. And even just one is a flash of bright light in the gray.

What was a Sweet! moment in your week?

(I know you can think of at least one!)

 

 

My Wish for You

...And a Happy Friday!

Prayers for Haley

Daniel heard whimpers from the edge of our porch. Following the sound, he discovered our neighbor's dog, Haley, lying in the dirt. Cuts covered her body - her eye, her paws, her belly, her thigh - blood oozing, but thankfully, not pouring out.

He helped her up onto the porch. She couldn't walk on her own.

We called our neighbors and, with much effort, Daniel helped carry her up to their car for the trip to the vet.

Initially we thought (and feared) she'd been attacked by something - a coyote, perhaps, or bobcat. But Haley's tough and we couldn't imagine what could have gotten her to this extent.

But now it appears she was hit by a car - and that upsets me almost as much as the idea of a rogue coyote or bobcat attacking in the middle of the day. 

Because from what I know of Haley, she doesn't chase cars. And we live on a rocky, bumpy dirt road. No one should be driving fast. How could they not have seen her? 

And there's no way they could hit her and not realize it - it would be like hitting a boulder, she's that solid. Why didn't they stop?

The neighbors promised to call and give us an update this morning when they hear from the vet. Please keep this sweet little girl in your prayers! (As well as the driver who hit her; if they can hit something like this and keep driving, they definitely need prayers, too!)

Update on Haley...

No broken bones! She has a "separated pelvis" or something like that, but it will heal on its own with time. Thank you for your prayers. She really is a sweetheart.

 

Sweet Reflections on a Sunday Morning

Dear God,

Thank you for this day, for letting me wake in Mam-ma's room, surrounded by so many sweet memories. Thank you for the sounds of Daddy, moving around the kitchen, and the rumbling thunder outside, a promise of rain on this parched land.

Thank you for this time with my Mama and Daddy, and with my kids, all three of them stll nestled in beds that have cushioned them most of their lives, in bedrooms from my childhood. Please help me be a blessing to them all.

Please watch over us as we head home today... 

It's raining, although not as much as Daddy would like, so he's grumbling a little. He's in the kitchen, rustling up some breakfast for Mama, who is now up and helping keep the squirrels in peanuts. I just missed a great shot of a dove and the kids are still sleeping. They were up longer than the rest of us, the sounds of their mingled laughter drifting in to me as I fell asleep.

It's a beautiful Sunday.  

 

Sunday: a pre-dawn horizon glowing red above the water; walking on the beach, witnessing the sun rising above the waves; tagging along on a photo-staging with your new artist friend; hitting a "Penny" sale... buy one, get one for a penny... with your girlfriends; home safe and sound from a wonderful weekend; grilled pork loin a la Tom; tagging along on your boys' trip to Europe via photos posted on Facebook; reading a letter written by your great-great-great-great-grandfather to his brother in France, written in 1810, that answers so many questions about your family history

Monday: glimpsing Belle's face peering in at me through the French doors before dawn has even softened the darkness of night; a morning walk with my puppies (I missed them!); eagerly wondering what new door God is planning to open for me now that another one is shutting - and realizing the thought was automatic, not just a way to cheer myself up; hearing (with relief) from your doctor what you already suspected... that the lump in your breast is just a result of your out-of-control coffee addiction; sitting in your car chatting with your daughter, catching up on the latest in her life, then having dinner with your middle son AND getting a phone call from your oldest

Tuesday: needing a light jacket on your morning walk; sunlight kissing the top branches of the trees; the joy in a running dog's face; a whole day at home to work on your projects, including your book for the first time in weeks; a call from a friend letting you know she'll be in town on Friday (time for a get-together!); sitting in a rocker on the front porch reading, a puppy dog at your feet; a new episode of "Glee" 

Wednesday: working on your book two days in a row; tons of information for your book from your cousin in your email inbox; news that your recently graduated son got called for a job interview

Thursday: meeting a deadline on your book review; reflecting on an inspiring life; writing, writing, writing

Friday: wishing your father a happy 85th birthday; reciprocating a favor by helping to take care of friends' dogs; a glass of wine on the back deck with a sweet friend; dinner and some dancing with more dear friends at Steiner Ranch Steakhouse 

Saturday: hearing all of Peter Frampton's "Do You Feel Like We Do?" on the car radio (and singing along); all three kids under the same roof; seeing your cousin Sheryl and her husband Bill for the first time in years; celebrating your Daddy's 85th birthday with fresh seafood and German Chocolate Cake, surrounded by family; your brother-in-law going to the trouble to find something for you on eBay he knows you will really appreciate (more on that later); reading to your toddler niece; experiencing Germany's Oktoberfest through your oldest son's iPhone videos and stories; laughing with your three kids over silly SNL skits and you-tube vids

Sunday: squirrels peering in at sliding doors, begging for peanuts; helping your daddy find information on Drop Foot on the internet and (maybe) convincing him to get the brace the doctor suggested since it's still bothering him; the sound of rain and thunder all around the house, enough that your Daddy finally admits it's raining

Here's wishing you a beautiful Sunday, with skies the color of your dreams.

Answered Prayers

It's a toss-up which I love the best, autumn's electric blue sky stretching cloudless from horizon to horizon or summer's sky of robin blue, dotted with cloud-dogs and cloud-dragons and cloud-ships. 

But even I, lover of blue skies and sunshine, can appreciate the beauty of a stormy sky, of the grays and pinks...

 

...of the drama and excitement, the battle between darkness and light...

 

 

...how the darkness makes the light brighter and how the light opens up new colors and levels in the clouds and the sky and the sunlight...

 

 

...how gray and dark can hold such promise of life, how they can ease anxiety and be the answer to the prayers of millions.

 

It took two days but these clouds finally opened up and let rain fall on the Hollow and much of Central Texas this weekend.

Hallelujah!

But even before the rain, and even if it didn't rain, I was grateful for the storm clouds.

Even I get tired of blue sometimes.

(Taken with my iPhone while my camera enjoyed a little R&R at the camera spa...what a great invention, the camera/phone! I still missed my camera, but having this kept my separation anxiety from being too, too bad!)

 

A Week's Worth of Sweets

It rained today. 

For the first time in months, I heard thunder. I felt raindrops.

I was at work, busy with customers and orders and separate checks, but even though I couldn't really dance in the rain, in my mind I imagined I was. And it felt great!

Sweet!

 

Last Sunday I met friends at a Mexican food restaurant to celebrate my friend Gwen's birthday. I brought Gwen a present. Just a simple gift.

Gwen brought me 3 containers of metal and porcelain decorations, cupcake holders, and pretty plates for me to use at my parents' upcoming birthday celebrations. Gwen gave me (gave me, mind you) the sign above. She's weeding out things and thought of me when she saw it.

Sweet!

(I don't deserve my friends!)

Last night around 9pm my sons, my son's girlfriend and her cousin boarded a plane for Germany. I prayed. I calculated when they should land. This morning before work I opened Facebook and saw check-ins from Germany. 

Sweet!

Here are a few more sweet!s from the past week...

Sunday: Celebrating a friend's birthday with Mexican food and Mexican martinis; spending time with the Harvest moon; moonlight on a metal roof; looking at the full moon through binoculars with your son

Monday: kneeling and praying in an "empty" church, just you and God; conversations with blog friends, dreaming about wish-list cameras and lenses; your son cooking dinner; an email from a sweet friend you haven't heard from in awhile

Tuesday: the full moon hanging around after sunrise, peeking out of pink clouds; dove tracks reappearing on the road; responses to your shout-out about raffle tickets benefiting a wonderful cause

Wednesday: another request for raffle tickets waiting in my inbox; chatter of mountain jays; catching orange moon just above the horizon over the vineyard; cheesecake with blueberries and raspberry sauce; the smell of chocolate torte baking

Thursday: spending the day with your son before he flies off to Germany; finally getting your camera and lenses cleaned; seeing a black widow spider and a rattlesnake up close without anyone getting hurt (!); meeting Mr. Ed (more on that later); your husband making it home safely while pulling a 20+ foot trailer loaded with 94 sheets of roofing metal 

Friday: your husband finding a wheat penny nestled in your coin purse (because you wouldn't have noticed it!); your puppy dogs being good hosts to their guest; remembering your doctor appointment before you were too, too late; gray clouds in the sky most of the day, even if they don't hold any rain for you; finding out that even though a friend recently had malaria, he's all better now

Saturday: knowing the traveling kids landed safely in Germany; time for a walk with your husband and puppies before work; thunderstorms and rain after months of drought; hearing "good job" from a co-worker

What are some of your sweet! moments from the past week? I hope you had plenty!

(Not so sweet - getting behind on emails and my Facebook people and favorite blogs again! Don't give up on me or forget me!)

Linking up with focus52's theme "bokeh"

 

September, Oktober(fest) and my Friday Favorite Photo

"By all these lovely tokens

September days are here,

With summer’s best of weather

And autumn’s best of cheer."

-   Helen Hunt Jackson, September, 1830-1885

 

Wednesday night, alone on the Bistro patio after a special banquet, I bent over to un-velcro a small cushion from one of the metal chairs. Triple digit heat had given way to a cooling breeze whispering over the vineyard. An acoustic guitar strummed a beautiful song through the outside speakers.

I turned to remove another cushion and that's when I saw it, the orange orb hovering on the horizon, smiling down on the grapevines. The beauty, the peace, they total SIGH of it all froze me in place for several moments. I could have stayed there, doing nothing but soaking it all in with all of my senses for hours.

I love September... I love full moons... so that's why I chose the one above as my favorite this week. 

********************************************************

My boys are on the edge of a European adventure. They're in Chicago as I'm typing this but jumping on another plane this evening, headed for Munich to experience an authentic Oktoberfest, visit castles and all that fun German stuff.

In a few days, they'll head for Prague, Czech Republic. Another place I've longed to visit.

I'm unashamedly living vicariously through my sons the next few days just as I did with TG when she traveled to Spain a few years ago. 

A photo of them at the airport would have been my favorite photo of the week, except I wasn't there to see them off. They left early this morning from San Antonio, along with Tommy's girlfriend Kirby. We met up with her in San Marcos last night to trade Daniel for our grandpuppy, Josie. We'll be puppy-sitting for the next week or so. (Max and Belle are very excited!)

In Chicago, the trio are meeting up with Kirby's cousin Matt before taking off on the next leg of the adventure.

All I've asked for are lots of photos and, if possible, something with "Czechoslovakia" written on it. Heck, it could be a napkin for all I care, but "Czechoslovakia" has been my favorite word for as long as I can remember... it's just so much fun to say. I love the rhythm of it, the way it dances around in your mouth. Try it!!

(I can't believe they traded "Czechoslovakia" for "Czech Republic"! Not nearly as much fun, in my opinion.)

Since I don't have a photo of them, passport in hand and loaded down with luggage, and because their trip is throwing me back into my own memories (a sure sign I'm getting old, right?) I'm adding one of me with my friends Donna and Laura, on the edge of our own European adventure way back in '76. (I'm the brunette on the right.)

Under that brown hair, I truly believed this was just a preview of many European trips to come. I'm only 52 now - even though I haven't returned yet, there's still plenty of time for my brunette 17-year-old self to be right, isn't there?

But even if I never get the chance (more like, have the money), I'm so glad my kids have the travel bug and are taking advantage of the opportunity.

Please join me in praying they have a safe, fun adventure (and bring their old mom lots of photos!) Thank you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When you're down and troubled...

"...and you need a helping hand. And nothing, nothing is going right..."

 

"Close your eyes and think of me and soon I will be there..."

I covered for our church secretary yesterday afternoon so she could keep a doctor's appointment. It doesn't pay much, but sitting in her chair even for a short time I sense the pulse of our parish in a way that's impossible to feel from just attending weekly Mass and dropping a check or two in the offering plate.

In the two hours I sat there yesterday afternoon, two people approached our church for assistance. First, an elderly woman called, needing help with paying her rent. I gave her the number for our St. Vincent de Paul Society because that's what they do, help people in our parish with electric bills, rent, doctor's bills, you name it. If someone calls who isn't in our parish, they let them know where to turn.

Soon afterward, a young man stepped into the foyer, his face wearing a mixture of desperation, hope, gratitude, anxiety and relief. He had contacted SVP but missed the return call from our member and came up to the church, hoping to find her there. Even though I wasn't the person he sought, he thanked me and blessed me anyway, patting my arm in gratitude, tears edging the corners of his eyes.

"... to brighten up even your darkest night. You just call out my name and you know wherever I am, I'll come running to see you again. Winter, spring, summer or fall...all you have to do is call, and I'll be there. You've got a friend."

I didn't know the young man. I'm not sure if he's a member of our church or not - the St. Vincent de Paul Society does their best to help all in need regardless of their beliefs.

But I imagined him to be a young father trying to help his family, responsibility and love overcoming any feelings of shame he felt for having to ask for help. Or maybe he was a son, trying to get help for his elderly parents.

All I know is, before heading up to the church, I had to sit and pay some bills before late charges were tacked on and the gloom cast by our dwindling bank account still lingered in my heart knowing there were still more to pay today.

Yet witnessing the desperate hope and gratitude of this young man, I immediately gave thanks myself that, dwindling funds or not, at least I had money to pay them.  

 "If the sky above you grows dark and full of clouds and that old north wind begins to blow, keep your head together and call my name out loud. Soon, you'll hear me knocking at your door."

Then I remembered the twenty raffle tickets I shoved in my purse two weeks ago. Our parish's annual Oktoberfest is coming up on October 8 and the proceeds, including those from the raffle tickets, help fund our St. Vincent de Paul Society, as well as our other church organizations, like the Women's Guild that, among other things, provides school supplies for low-income families and Easter baskets for nursing home residents.

Despite good intentions to start peddling those raffle tickets right away, they're still right where I shoved them, buried in the bottom of my purse, along with forgotton pennies, crumpled gas receipts and those good intentions.

If I could, I would just buy them all myself, plus some, but I can't. I'll buy a couple, but starting today, with the old women's voice and the young man's face in my mind, I'm peddling the heck out of the rest of them to everyone I meet, starting with you.

I hope I sell so many I have to run up to the church for more!

So here's the deal. For a $10 ticket, you get a chance at 5 different prizes and you don't have to be present to win.

1st prize - $5000 gift card
2nd prize - Maid service for 1 year (or equivalent value gift card of $3000)
3rd prize - Apple iPad 2 (or equivalent value gift card of $800)
4th prize - American Girl Doll or Electric Scooter (estimated value $450)
5th prize - Weber Performance Charcoal Grill (or equivalent value gift card of $450)

I confess that in all the years I've been buying and selling these tickets, I've never won and neither have the people I've sold them to. But I keep hoping - that's what these tickets are all about, right? Giving hope?

If you're interested in buying one or two or twenty, e-mail me at barbarashallue (at) yahoo (dot) com and I'll let you know how to get your ticket or tickets. But whether or not you buy any, please say a prayer that enough money is raised to help all of those who will need it in the coming year. 

"Ain't it good to know you've got a friend when people can be so cold. They'll hurt you and desert you...and take your soul if you let them...oh, but don't you let them. You just call out my name, and you know wherever I am, I'll come running to see you again.

Winter, spring, summer or fall, all you have to do is call, and I'll be there.

You've got a friend."

~Carole King

*************************************************

 This is actually Part 2 of a post from 2009, where I wrote "Even before the economy took its latest nose dive, thousands were laid off from their jobs, and the sun went on overtime, there were many among us who were already struggling." 

The need itself never ends, does it? Next year I'm sure I'll be writing a Part 3.

(click HERE to see the whole post.)

 

*************************************

Oktoberfest itself is a lot of small town fun (you know, a carnival for the children, a country store, silent auction, turkey legs, music, a German dinner, bingo) so if you're in the area, come on over!

Here are the details: 

Saturday October 8 from 8am to 7pm at St. Mary Our Lady of the Lake Catholic Church (6100 Lohman Ford Rd. Lago Vista, Texas, 78645.)

**** Admission is free, but full disclosure: our motive is to Raise Money! ***** 

Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.

~ 1 John 4:11

 

 

Thinking of Peace and Sweet!ness

I have an unexpected day off tomorrow. I'm getting dizzy trying to decide what to do with it! Do I focus on "getting stuff done" or just relax and have fun? I imagine it will fall somewhere in between. I think I'll just start somewhere and see where it leads me. Who knows what I'll get done?

Whatever I decide to do, in the back of my mind I'll be remembering the events of the day ten years ago and giving thanks that those who wanted to destroy our country haven't succeeded.

The candle I light at Mass tomorrow morning will be for our country...

...for the victims of 9/11.

...for our soldiers and leaders.

...for those who hate our country.

...for peace. 

 Peace demands the most heroic labor and the most difficult sacrifice. It demands greater heroism than war. It demands greater fidelity to the truth and a much more perfect purity of conscience.

~ Thomas Merton

 

And now for some of the Sweet! moments of my week: 

Sunday: learning part of the San Antonio Spurs Cheerleader audition dance; sitting in a hot tub beneath a sky full of stars and a 3/4 moon; almost winning at beer pong; spending time with 2/3 of your kids

Monday: mimosas and breakfast tacos; rope swings and cold rivers; a swingset built sturdy enough for grownup-size kids; high temperatures in the low 90s; no wildfires near your house

Tuesday: coolness of a new autumn morning; no dogs in the laundry room; still no wildfires near your house

Wednesday: reading in a hammock; spotting the doves you feared were the victims of dove season (see above); sneaking photos of birds visiting the birdfeeder; glorious blue skies

Thursday: mornings cool enough to sip coffee and read on the front porch; sneaking more photos of mountain jays and doves; meeting a book review deadline; eating Chinese food and watching "The Help" with friends you don't see often enough 

Friday: leftover Chinese food; a long-overdue phone visit with your sister; sitting on the front porch in the evening, listening to music with your husband and son

Saturday: an early morning walk with your husband and puppies; catching live footage of Lynyrd Skynyrd singing "Free Bird" on Cool TV; assurance that friends who live near current wildfires haven't been affected by the fires; an Andy Garcia movie from '95

I wish you Peace and a week full of Sweet!s!

"You comin', Mom?"

Horizons

 

Disturb us, Lord, when

 We are too well pleased with ourselves,

 When our dreams have come true

 Because we have dreamed too little,

 When we arrived safely

 Because we sailed too close to the shore.

- Sir Francis Drake

I have a map in my mind, with huge circles drawn around several destinations. I've charted the journey, made lists of things I need to take with me, things I need to do in preparation and started crossing items off.

 But as time goes by without losing sight of land, I fear I'm satisfied with the Idea of a Journey and that I'll never actually get the nerve to set sail on the wide sea.

I fear indecision will keep me drifting close to shore, where pretty distractions make me forget about my dreams or news of potential storms make me afraid of heading into unknown waters.

Or if I do manage to jump aboard my boat and head for sea, I fear I've plotted the wrong path.

So this little prayer from Sir Francis is a good reminder to keep moving forward and not get too caught up in the details.

At some point, if you want to arrive at your destination, you have to pull up the anchor, pull Faith onboard, wave Doubt goodby and just go, right?

Wish me luck!

(These thoughts were inspired by THIS POST by Baron Batch - if you're facing a storm or a journey into the unknown, I recommend reading it!)

 (the rest of Sir Francis's prayer...)

Disturb us, Lord, when
With the abundance of things we possess
We have lost our thirst
For the waters of life;
Having fallen in love with life,
We have ceased to dream of eternity
And in our efforts to build a new earth,
We have allowed our vision
Of the new heaven to dim.

Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,
To venture on wider seas
Where storms will show your mastery;
Where losing sight of land,
We shall find the stars.

We ask you to push back
The horizons of our hopes;
And to push into the future
In strength, courage, hope, and love.

- Sir Francis Drake

Just counting a few of my blessings... (my Friday Favorite Photos)

 

1. Rain on my windshield! Before heading to Houston yesterday, I swung downtown to drop some things off for TG on campus, and I heard an unusual sound... raindrops on my car! And then it actually rained on me all the way to Smithville or LaGrange. It wasn't enough to wash the dust from my car, but I'm grateful even for this small amount. Tom says a little even fell at our house, hallelujah! At least we know it remembers where we live!

2. My parents back at home; specifically, Daddy out of the hospital. Nothing more to add. That's enough!

3. Being able to catch a photo of my great-niece Haila smiling. I love this one of her and her daddy, Evan, my brother's son. They were in Houston visiting from Wyoming and I'm so glad I was able to run down to see them. I've been told Haila never fusses, but just before I arrived, she woke from a bad dream and cried and cried a good part of the time I was there. When she wasn't crying, she was on the move. This is a miracle capture!

4. My sister Brenda can walk without her cane! Just a few steps and she keeps it handy, but still, that's a major accomplishment and a beautiful sight to see. I haven't seen her since her hip surgery 5 months ago - how can that be possible? To say she looks much better would be an understatement!

I returned this evening from a quick trip to my hometown to attend my friend's husband's funeral. As you can see from these photos, I packed a lot into 24 hours... long overdue visits with my parents and siblings plus hugs (and tears) with my lifetime friends at the viewing and funeral.

I wish I'd had more time, but I'm just grateful I was able to sneak down there at all. I have to work tomorrow.

I'm hoping to fit another trip in soon for a second interview with my parents and to gather with the other Deer Park Divas around our friend. She's doing great now, but we all know the next few months are going to be tough.

This next week I'm focusing on getting organized - I have no deadlines to make me crazy although another book is in the mail for the next BlogHer Book Club review. I'm looking forward to it, though. These book reviews have kept me reading all summer.

The last one I read was Faithful Place, by Tana French - a wonderful love story/murder mystery with the kind of writing that makes me want to go revise everything I've ever written! You can read the full review HERE on BlogHer.

I have several friends and quite a bit of family over there on the East Coast and even though I've been on the road, I know there's a hurricane headed their way, so I'll be praying it's a dud like the one aimed at us a few weeks ago! And if not quite a dud, that its damage is minimal. Stay safe, all of you!

 

 

 

Phone Calls, Heartbeats, Hugs

A call that wakes you in the morning rarely bears good news.

The call that woke me yesterday let me know a dear friend's husband had died. He had some health issues (who doesn't by the time you hit your 50's?) but nothing that warned her that a day we all dread and hope never comes would soon arrive on her doorstep.

I, in turn, began making calls and sending messages to other friends, and they then did the same... so many digital arms stretching out and surrounding our friend, embracing her in a virtual hug. It's comforting to be able to connect that way with men and women who are still just school-age boys and girls in your mind.

Most of us will come together in person on Friday for the service and we'll continue to encircle our friend afterward as long as she needs us. 

I've been wanting to head that way to see my parents, anyway, especially since Daddy's recent hospital visit, and my nephew, his wife and baby are visiting from Wyoming this week. 

I always enjoy fitting a visit with friends into my trips home, but not under these circumstances.

One friend shared a comment his father-in-law made years ago...  "when you're in your sixties, the funeral homes become your reunions with everyone." We're not yet in our sixties, but I think we've met at too many funerals already.

So if you don't mind, please say a little prayer for my friend this weekend. And while you're at it, could you pray for a bit of rain to head our way? We just passed the triple digit record - 70 (sweaty) days this summer as of today. 

Oh, and two more prayer requests. I've delivered TG and her things safely back to campus - would you say a prayer for her for a safe and successful semester... and one for her recently graduated brother to find a job?

I promise that's all (for now.)

Thank you in advance.

I'll be praying for all of the above, plus keeping the East Coast in my prayers as Hurricane Irene heads its way and I'll also give thanks the recent earthquake up there didn't do more damage.

Just too much going on, isn't there?

How do we get back to simple? Or is simple just an illusion created by our memories? Probably. If so, then I'm even more grateful for my memories. 

Sweets in a busy week

For some reason, I thought this past week would have more time in it. 

I thought by the time I headed to work at the Bistro this morning, I would be all caught up on everything, plus perhaps even a little ahead on a few things.

Well, I wasn't. But I refuse to give myself a hard time about it. There's always next week... (and if there's not, then none of it matters anyway, right?)

I was so scatterbrained this whole week that a dear friend's 50th birthday snuck up on me... I remembered in time to send an email and a text, but not in time to send the card I intended to send all week (it was even on my to-do list!)

Despite that, I actually kept track of my Sweets! each day. It appears I've managed to turn it into a habit. (Thank goodness! I needed another good one to balance out the bad ones!)

So here they are, a few of my sweet moments of this past crazy-busy airheaded week...

 

Saturday: running 1.5 miles in less than 15 minutes for the first time in 30+ years; watching the full moon rise over Lake Travis with your sweetie pie and thinking about all the full moons you've shared in the past 29 years; grilled rib-eye steak, baked potato with the works and cheesecake

Sunday: listening to an inspiring sermon on faith; miraculously getting to work on time; laughing over old episodes of Twin Peaks with your son 

Monday: a morning walk with the full moon; news that your brother snuck off and got married over the weekend; hours and hours of writing 

Tuesday: tons of prayer and sweet thoughts from your friends for your dad who is in the hospital; meeting a deadline

Wednesday: praying in a quiet, empty church; news that your dad passed his arteriogram with flying colors

Thursday: skipping on a dirt road; shopping with your frugal daughter; lots of reading time

Friday: hitting the clearance racks with your daughter, Part 2; satisfying your shoe addiction within your budget; watching a movie with your sweetie

Saturday: sleeping in (ahhhh!); time at work to snap lots of photos; news that your dad is passing all of his tests, even if the doctors can't figure out what's causing his problems and won't let him escape from the hospital yet

 

Hope you took time to notice your sweet moments, too! 

At times

With mere minutes to spare (I thought) I hit the send button, catapulting my She Writes submission just under the deadline wire. 

Turns out I had four hours left - Tom and I both weren't thinking straight on the Pacific vs. East Coast time thing - but that's okay. If I'd known I had the time, I would have used it, staying up way too late. I'm already dragging as it is.

I spent the past two days writing, writing, writing, trying to get those 2000 words just right. Sometimes the story just flowed - I was right there in it. Other times the words I needed were rooted in hard soil;  I had to plant my feet and pull, pull, pull till they broke free.

Anyway, after staying focused on my book like that, and working the whole weekend, I'm behind on everything else again. 

I'm not even talking about laundry. I can live with that. What stresses me out is my email inbox is overflowing and mostly unanswered, I have 341 unread posts on my Google Reader and I have no idea what celebrations, trials or tribulations my Facebook friends have been going through for days.  

I don't like that. Will I ever find a balance?

Today I've been too scatterbrained and distracted to accomplish much of anything. Here it is almost 8pm and I have no idea where the day went, except for the almost 2 hours I spent on the phone with a nice lady from AT&T who tried to help me set up my outdated version of Outlook Express on my ancient computer, and the quick trip into town to light a candle in the church, water my friend's plants and grab some milk from the store.

See, as of yesterday evening, my dad is in the hospital. It's unclear exactly what's wrong with Daddy, but a good guess is some sort of circulation issue, his main gremlin the past few decades. They're running tests and I pray they're able to determine what's going on. (An update before I could publish this - so far everything they've tested is looking good! Maybe it's something minor after all!!)

I jumped on Facebook last night long enough to request prayers, and the outpouring of positive energy in my mom and dad's direction through prayer, good thoughts and love was phenomenol. 

Thank you all! I hope to be a better friend and less of a scatterbrain next week. (No guarantees before then!)

 

I know that at times I will be troubled, 
I know that at times I will be belabored,
I know that at times I will be disquieted,
But I believe that I will not be overcome.
Amen.

- Julian of Norwich

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It could be worse, couldn't it?

Fall colors surround us, temperatures have dropped, but there's no touch of autumn in the air; daily highs still top 100 with nary a drop of rain.

(Clouds congregrate at times, but even when tinged gray, I know they're just playing games with us.)

We've had hot, dry summers before, though.

One in particular stands out in my memory (and makes me sweat!) because I was driving that old green Mercury Villager minivan with no air-conditioning and a passenger window that wouldn't roll down.

That was the summer I taught Daniel to drive. We always headed out early enough to finish the lessons by 10 am because that's when my side of the van became an oven, even with my Walmart water-mister fan, and I became a little, ahem, grumpy.

Spanky the salamander was still with us then, staying cool hiding under wet moss in his terrarium, only expending energy to gobble down a live cricket or two. Once or twice a week we'd grab a plastic bag full of them from the pet store and dump them into their own little terrarium, furnished with an empty toilet paper roll and a little water. Every day Daniel scooped a few out for Spanky's dinner.

One afternoon the kids and I swung by the pet store for a bag of crickets, the last stop on our round of errands in town. It was 4 in the afternoon and (according to the fancy digital dash thermometer) 107 degrees.

The crickets didn't stand a chance. Poor little guys, they baked right there in that plastic bag - an oven within our oven van.

Yes, things could be worse. I have an air-conditioned car this year and give thanks for it and the a/c in our home every day!

We even still - somehow - have a little water in the pond. It had dried up enough for Tom to get his backhoe down there to scoop up the silt (making the best of the situation!) and he must have somehow unblocked the opening to some underground springs.

I'm really surprised anything is flowing from the springs right now, but as you can see, there's water in the pond. It has to come from somewhere, and it sure isn't from the sky!

Belle's grateful for it.

Not much of a pond, though, is it? 

One year the water completely, totally dried up. Tom was able to scoop enough silt to see fossils embedded in the bedrock of the original creekbed, right about where my name is in the above photo. I love knowing they're there, even if I can't see them anymore.

Tom had to halt work on the pond because of the water; instead, he has turned his attention to the creek bed downstream, beyond the little pond (which still has a few inches of water in it, too) clearing overgrowth and scooping silt, preparing for the rain we know will fall, someday.

But when?

All the land is praying for rain.

 

 

 

Detours (and my Friday Favorite Photo)

This has been one crazy, zig-zagging, bouncing, stretching-myself-across-so-many-things-I-think-I'm-going-to-pop kind of week. One of those weeks where everything is high priority and you just can't procrastinate any longer. So you just do it all, period, and try your best to get some sleep.

Things like a writing deadline, a book review deadline, a contact list to compile and a group email that had to go out, a BlogHer assignment, a Parish Council meeting, eye doctor appointments x 3 of us, my car inspected, our anniversary looming, my sister's birthday, a dozen blog posts swirling in my head waiting to be born, a new FlickR project, my refrigerator filter glowing orange, watering a friend's plants while she's out of town plus trying to keep our own alive...

Whew.

All of this on top of my two day jobs (weekday and weekend) overlapping so I have only one day off in 9 days right on the heels of a quick trip out of town to a wedding. 

I confess I didn't even think about housework of any kind this week or do more than glance at my three-page to-do list. 

If it weren't for Tom, TG and Daniel helping with cooking, laundry and whatever I ask them to do around here, I really would have popped, I'm sure.

Of course, it's not over yet. I work both days this week at the Bistro; we celebrate our anniversary tomorrow night (we're thinking dessert at Sonic at sunset); reading and writing deadlines still loom, the filter light still gives me an orange wink every time I open the fridge door, my car still isn't inspected (shhh! don't tell!), I haven't started the FlickR project, and my laundry is overflowing...

But the good news is I'll have time to take care of most of these starting Monday. The bad news is it's because one of my jobs ended, which means one of my paychecks. The good news is that means I'll have more time to focus on my book and my businesses, and I'll still be moderating the Jobs4Autism website.

I haven't decided if I've come to another detour in my life or if I'm actually stepping back onto the main road. I've taken so many detours I'm not even sure what the main road looks like anymore. Some detours were results of my own decisions; some just plopped down from no where, forcing me to veer in a new direction.

I came across this on a blog today, written by Baron Batch, a Texas Tech to Pittsburgh Steelers football player/writer:

"The funny thing about all roads is that at some point they all have potholes, speed bumps and detours. However, the durability of your vehicle is what allows you to reach your destination regardless of your traveling conditions."

Baron's post is a tribute to his faith and a reminder of the value of detours in our life. Instead of playing in his first NFL game this week, he tore his ACL. He writes...

"Trying to understand Gods plan will bring insanity, trusting it brings peace."

So much wisdom in one so young! I aspire to have that kind of faith and pray my kids do, too. I hope we all have durable vehicles! (I wish I could be confident that when my own kids face detours in their lives, when things go wrong as they always will, they hear my voice whispering, "Have faith, have faith.")

 

And now for my Friday Favorite Photo!

I picked this one of Max because...

a) it's taken with my new 50mm lens! and 

b) he's eating! 

(He stopped eating for awhile last weekend when we were gone. Got me so worried! Dang dogs.)

Now that I think of it, Max himself was a detour. We had decided we weren't going to have any more dogs. Then that starving puppy wandered up and stole our hearts...

Hope you've had a wonderful week... hope you have a great weekend...  and hope you look at the detours in your life as opportunities rather than bad luck.

Amen.

 

 

 

 

 

Shadows and Light

 

On Death
 ~Kahlil Gibran

You would know the secret of death.
But how shall you find it unless you seek it in the heart of life?
The owl whose night-bound eyes are blind unto the day cannot unveil the mystery of light.
If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life.
For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.


In the depth of your hopes and desires lies your silent knowledge of the beyond;
And like seeds dreaming beneath the snow your heart dreams of spring.
Trust the dreams, for in them is hidden the gate to eternity.
Your fear of death is but the trembling of the shepherd when he stands before the king whose hand is to be laid upon him in honour.
Is the shepherd not joyful beneath his trembling, that he shall wear the mark of the king?
Yet is he not more mindful of his trembling?


For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun?
And what is it to cease breathing, but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered?


Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.
And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.
And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance.

 

The second I became a mother, I also gave birth to the fear of losing my child.

I'm blessed that it has remained just a fear, not a reality; only an inkling of the actual pain, like dipping your toe into a cold lake versus falling completely into its frigid depths, staring up at the sunlight but unable to feel its warmth.

I realize I'm just three heartbeats away from that pain, but I've grown used to the fear. I sense it there, just around the corner, a shadow cast by the light of the living, but I don't dwell on its presence or let it control me or even worry me. What's the use? I'd rather focus on the light.

But there are times I'm reminded of its nearness, and how blessed I am that it has remained around the corner. This week has been one of them.

The deaths of our Navy Seals... the riots in London... a friend whose mother's cancer has returned, this time with no hope of another remission, only an hourglass running out of sand. 

So much sadness. Each one affected, someone's child. Someone's parent. Or sibling, lover, friend.

On Facebook a page popped up I'd forgotten about, created as a place to remember students and faculty from our high school who had passed.

I posted my class's "In Memorium" list. (At our reunions, we light a candle, then I read the list out loud, followed by a few moments of silence in memory of those we've lost.) Right away classmates popped up, reminding me of several others I needed to add. 

My heart protests that we're too young to have lost this many - too many- but my brain reminds me of our age. Ah, yes. Not so young. Those we lost early on were someone's sibling, someone's child, but these recent ones are also someone's mother, father, wife, husband, grandmother, grandfather. 

Last night I stayed up late, compiling a spreadsheet of names. I'm helping organize a reunion for people I worked with 30 years ago and one of my co-workers sent me several lists of names from way back then. 

The names floated out to me from mists of the past, bringing with them memories that had drifted out of reach, forgotten. Memories of days spent in a hard hat, sweating in the pipe alleys, laughing and eating popcorn in the control room, freezing in the lab. 

Too many names are already marked "deceased."

I sent the revised list out via email today - responses flowed back, informing me of updates: emails, phone numbers and more who have died before we had a chance to see them again.

This past Sunday, Father Don talked about fear, about trusting God. I know I've been lucky - I lost my brother Buster, my grandparents, my pets who felt like children, but I know so far I've been spared the true anguish that comes from losing a child, a parent, a spouse. Those who are pieces of you. 

The thing is, none of us can escape this pain. We can try by not letting ourselves get close to others, by trying not to love, but that's a living death, isn't it, living without loving?

I believe God will support me through that inevitable pain. I believe he will soothe and comfort me, if I let him, and I'm grateful for my faith. But how do those without faith survive? 

I came across this blog the other day, penned by a woman who has experienced the death of two children. I can't imagine that pain. But this is what I read on her blog: 

"All of my followers here on my blog know I am a twice bereaved parent. What very few of you all know is that I carried my oldest daughter across & personally handed her to the angels who completed the journey with her. So you can trust me when I tell you this: if you want to know where God lives put yourself somewhere in a place of peace; get lost in some music, or the soft sound of the wind in the trees, or anything that lifts you up. Close your eyes & feel the joy. THAT is where God lives, and THAT is where Heaven is."

For this whole month, she will be sharing her experience, sharing "...where and how I get my strength."

Click HERE to read along.

He himself is our peace. Ephesians 2:14

 

Headed for Adventure, a Crape Myrtle Update and Saturday's Belated "Sweet!" Report

Tom and Daniel headed out this morning for several days of fishing on the coast. Would you believe TG and I weren't invited?

But that's okay with me. I wasn't even tempted to tag along. When I say they'll be "on the coast," I really mean "on the coast"! They're planning to park the truck right on the beach and just stay put. 

Despite my love for the sun and sand, my idea of a vacation at the beach includes an air-conditioned high-rise condo decorated in blues and greens and cute beach decor. Oh, and also with a balcony looking far out over the water where I can sit with my coffee in the mornings and a glass of wine in the evenings.

And I'll get exactly that in about two months. 

So, have fun, guys! Be safe! TG and I will miss you while we sit here holding down this (air-conditioned) home fort!

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My poor baby crape myrtle trees. Only one is budding, and it hasn't made much progress in days. Every morning I haul buckets of water up the stone path to them, whisper encouraging things and say another prayer for a good soaking rain. 

Sigh.

At least their leaves are still green. And summer's not over!

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Now for my week of sweet! moments... 

Saturday: whacking and killing a centipede without its legs scattering all over the laundry room floor (why, yes, I do have a photo! But for the sake of the skittish, I decided not to share it. Yet...); a quick trip into a Goodwill store and finding treasure.

Sunday: spotting a silver fox running cross the road right in front of you on the way home from church.

Monday: a summer morning on the back deck; the sight of three spotted fawns lounging in the shade, waiting for their mamas (and the sight of their mamas joining them later, soothing your fear that the kids were abandoned!)

 Tuesday: stealing a few morning minutes to play your drums for the first time in months 

Wednesday: another sighting of the fawns, this time with their big brother (who keeps an eye on you as you walk by!)

Thursday: the quiet of a college computer lab when you need to write 

Friday: a perfect Reuben sandwich; more bargains at Goodwill; an afternoon with friends and my camera in an old Texas courthouse square full of eclectic shops and architecture.

Saturday: hummingbirds; an icy limoncella (or two) with friends on a hot Texas evening; Mary Kay's chicken enchiladas; selling some jewelry!

What were some of your sweet! moments this week? (You are keeping track, aren't you?)

 

Why, Thank You! (and my Friday Favorite Photo!)

Thank you to everyone who said a prayer, crossed their fingers or in some way tried to steer Tropical Storm Don more to the north, providing us with a better chance of rain to ease this drought.

However, I just saw this post by my weatherman on Facebook...

Dear Don,
Thanks for nothing.
Sincerely,
Central Texas.
p.s. Emily...we're counting on you.

It seems pretty official that Don left us in the dust. Literally.

But, I know God knows what he's doing, so I guess South Texas and Mexico needed the rain more than we did right now. Perhaps this "Emily" is the answer to our prayer, so please keep 'em coming!

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Did you read my Face in the Mirror post a few days ago? 

When my my blogger friend Suldog read it, he was inspired to write his own Ode to his Face.

Hop over to his site and take a look HERE. (Warning - his version is definitely rated at least PG-13. Maybe even R.)

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. ~ Charles Caleb Colton

... and I'm sure that includes parody. So thank you, Jim!

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Glancing at my stats the other day, I noticed several hits from a site called Best Posts of the Week. It seems someone nominated my Week of Moons post on my photography blog as a 'best post'. 

 I have no idea who it was, but who ever you are, thank you!

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Last year I spent a few days with my creative friend Ann in Galveston. I fell in love with an antique frame she had turned into an earring holder.

A few months later I came across a different version of the idea in a magazine and alerted my friends to be on the lookout for old photo frames so I could make my own.

My friend Mary Kay, as usual, wasn't satisfied with just finding me a frame - she went on to create this wonderful earring holder/display for me, as well as two others to use for my jewelry business. 

One thing is obvious - I need more earrings!

No, that's not it. What's obvious is Mary Kay is amazing - and an amazing friend!

Thank you, Mary Kay!

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I took the day off for some junking/photography fun today. Along with Mary Kay (see above), her friend Claudia visiting from Colorado and TG, I spent the day enjoying old Georgetown... 

...and kicking myself, because I can't even count the number of times I've been in Georgetown over the past 15 years for soccer games, college visits, doctor visits, eating out, visiting friends... and never took the time to explore the wonderful town square, full of eclectic shops and beautiful architecture. 

Thanks again to Mary Kay for finally getting me there and to Claudia for lunch at the Monument Cafe. It was a wonderful day.

 

Look at this bench made to look like a book, sitting outside of a bookstore - I LOVE it! That's Claudia and Mary Kay just a little ways down...

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But that's not my favorite photo of the week. I picked this one of the purple flower because it's no longer there - the drought was too much for it.

But in this photo, it looks like it's dancing, doesn't it? It had fun - truly blossomed - while it was here.

(It's also posted HERE on my photography blog along with other flowers that defied the drought and bloomed anyway, at least for a little while.)

I also love this photo because it's such a tiny flower that you can't even see its beauty unless you get up this close - and that's such a great lesson about true beauty and paying attention, isn't it? It's often worth taking a closer look at things that it would be easy to ignore. 

Hope you had a wonderful Friday and didn't miss a thing!

 

 

A little more to the right, please...

Normally, there's no way I'd be praying for a tropical storm to head our way, especially on a weekend, but extreme circumstances call for extreme prayer!

(Forty-plus days of 100+ degree temps and the driest 7-month span on record qualifies as extreme circumstances, doesn't it? Thought so.)

I believe in the power of teamwork, so that's why I'm asking all of you to join me in praying, focusing, concentrating, meditating or, if nothing else, just keeping your fingers crossed that Tropical Storm Don veers a little more to the right.

See the "TX" down there, just to the right of the white stripe?

Well, that's about where I am, here in Long Hollow, and I really, really want Long Hollow to be on the left side of the projected path.

See, if Don changes his travel plans and heads for Dallas instead of El Paso, more of Texas (including Long Hollow) has a chance at the good soaking rain he'll be scooping out of the Gulf of Mexico and slinging over his left shoulder.

So if it's not too much to ask... PRAY! FOCUS! CONCENTRATE!!

Thank you!!

 

A Brother's Smile and other (belated) "Sweet!"s of the Week

The day his wife died, my brother Donnie lost his smile.

Well, he lost more than that; with just a glance at his drawn face, it was easy to believe he thought the world held absolutely nothing for him anymore. If it weren't for his children, I think he would have just sat in a corner and faded away.

But instead, he held on, gradually pulling himself back into the land of the living. Eventually the birth of his granddaughter reminded his face and heart how to smile. But it was still a rare and magical sight.

So you can imagine how ecstatic I am to report its return! He and his smile paid us an unexpected but very welcome visit this weekend, introducing us to the reason behind the smile's return: a girlfriend.

In other words... Love.

It turns out Donna grew up just around the corner from us. She and Donnie were great friends in high school but lost touch a few years later when he went in the Navy and she got married.

They recently reconnected via Facebook. He rode his Harley up to see her in person last month and he said it was like those years had never passed. (I believe him - he looks years younger!)

She lives in a little town not too far from us, so this weekend they drove over and spent the night. It was fun reminiscing, but more fun watching them beam at each other. 

What's rare now is his face without a smile. It's still hard for me to believe, but I tested it with my camera, always in the past a sure-fire way to make that smile run away and hide.

Not anymore, as you can see...

Aren't they cute? <sigh> Thank you, Donna! 

And thank you, Lord!

Accept the things to which fate binds you,

and love the people with whom fate brings you together,

but do so with all your heart.

~ Marcus Aurelius

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Between TG's birthday and Donnie's smile, that's already a lot of Sweet! but would you believe I spotted more sweet! moments this week? Here they are...

Sunday: spending a wonderful dinner with your niece-in-law while she's in town visiting her family

Monday: organizing a zillion loose to-do lists into one and scratching off tons of things before the day's over

Tuesday: finally getting your iPhone operational (it only took two full days and a few phone calls); a clean bathroom!

Wednesday: welcoming the newest baby Shallue into the world!; hours of work on your book; complete Lesson 1 of kim klassen's skinny mini class on Photoshop Elements (getting started is the hardest part!

Thursday: full moon waving goodnight through your kitchen window - at dawn; finally meeting the new parish priest; bougainvillea exploding with color even in a drought; sweet fresh strawberries 

Friday: mandatory employee wine-tasting session (!); just the moon, you, your camera and dog in the quiet of the night; a sweet comment from your mom on a blog post; watching a movie with your sweetie

Saturday: sleeping in; remembering the day twenty years ago when you first met your baby girl; an unexpected visit from your brother and getting to meet the woman who restored his smile

Sunday: fresh chocolate birthday cake washed down with a glass of cold milk

What was your most Sweet! moment this week?

 

 

 

 

It was a dark and stormy night...

I dreamed rain pelted our tin roof, hard, and thunder shook our windows.

Then I realized it wasn't a dream and, snuggling under my covers, dozed off again, grateful.

"Mom? Dad?" I woke again with a start, disoriented. Glanced at the clock. Midnight.

"We had a power outage. You probably need to set your phone alarms." It was TG on the other side of our door. "Oh, and the dogs want in."

I peaked out of my room. Lightning flashed just then, revealing the spectral silhouettes of two dogs peering in through the french doors.

Under cover of darkness, I snuck into the leaving room, snatched my phone from out of my purse and almost made it back to the bedroom before another flash of lightning cast its light on me like a deer caught in the glare of headlights.

I knew they could see me. I could imagine their big brown eyes gazing at me, pleading.

I hurried into the bedroom anyway, set my phone alarm and slipped back into bed. 

Then the voice started. I tried to ignore it, but it persisted.

Max is old, it chastised. He's scared. You should let him into the laundry room. Poor puppy, what about his heart?

Okay, okay, shut UP! I told the voice. Rolling back out of bed, I stumbled downstairs, slipped outside and peeked around the corner at the doghouse. "Puppies?"

Belle poked her head out and tilted it that way she does. So cute.

"Come..." Before the words were out of my mouth, she was running toward me, Max right behind her.

And then they were in the laundry room. And then... they shook.

And shook.

And shook.

Ugh! I didn't think about them being wet!

I grabbed a couple of beach towels, ruffled the water out of their still wet fur, turned off the light and slipped out, grateful for the stained concrete floor in that room that hides dirt and is so easy to clean.

Finally, I crawled back into bed. I was wide awake by then and just lay there, listening to the glorious sound of rain on our roof for over an hour before finally drifting off...

This morning I walked in a world washed clean and fresh. I swear, there were green things popping out everywhere! Maybe the rain just washed the dust away, but it sure looked to me like someone had come along and dribbled green paint all through the Hollow.

Birds sang a little louder and a water puddle even waited for Max and Belle at the curve in the road. They were ecstatic!

Tom took a walk on our property this evening and reported we have a foot of water in the big pond and three feet in the little pond (the minnows have a reprieve!) It's just June... we have two hot, dry months ahead of us, so no doubt they'll eventually dry up again...

But today we'll be grateful for the blessing of this rain.

And also for this sunset...

Thank you, Lord!

If I can put one touch of rosy sunset into the life of any man or woman, I shall feel that I have worked with God. 

~Gilbert K. Chesterton