Long Hollow

Five Things from La-La Land

Linking with A Rural Journal's Random 5 Friday 

 

1. 

 

This card, full of words of love and encouragement and inspiration, waited for me in the mailbox earlier this week, a precious gift from my friend Rae. 

How could I not share them with you, because the words are true for all of us, aren't they? Take a minute to read them and believe them. You are very special.

Thank you again, sweet Rae!

 

2.

In a previous life, Jeannie was my kids' high school Spanish teacher. A few years ago she retired to follow her dream of becoming a missionary in Honduras through SAMSUSA.org.

I subscribe to her newsletters and in today's I found this note that made me really stop and think. I thought it was worth sharing with you, too...

 

Dear Mission Partners,

I’ve been thinking a lot about what we pray for. I hear so many people resolve their problems and say, Oh, if God would just.....let me pass the exam, give me the dream job I want.... everything would be good and I could handle it from there. We want Him to hand our desires to us and back off. We want the control back. We think we know what’s best for us. When he doesn’t answer our prayer we feel abandoned. God doesn’t care.

We often never consider that He has other plans for us, probably much better plans that we have concocted to solve our problems and make us happy. Usually he makes us wait for His plans and the waiting is very hard when we see our solution just within our grasp. The solution is so obvious! Why won’t He just give it to us?

His plans are so much more comprehensive than our solutions. We don’t see His huge map. Like Sara with Abraham, we tire of waiting and substitute our plans for His. But the true solution is His. What we have done in the meantime may only complicate things.

I’m pretty clear on what I want. I work toward it and pray I am in line with what He wants. But I am praying that His Will, not mine, be done. I am praying to be obedient. Because I know He’s in control. And I have found his plans to be much better than mine. For His Sake,

Jeannie 

Jeannie does amazing work there with the poverty-stricken, transporting children to doctor's visits, among tons of other things. If you're interested in donating to support her mission, send me an email and I'll send you hers.

 

3.

"If you're lost and alone...or you're sinking like a stone...carry on.
May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground. Carry on."

~ Fun

Speaking of inspiring and energizing things, Fun. was on the Today Show this morning. This song has been in my head all day. (I'm not complaining!)

 

 

4.

It rained all day today, and I didn't mind a bit because I had no where to go. That's one of the good things about not having a real job beyond writing and a fledgling photography company. (The bad thing about it is the lack of a paycheck, of course.)

Anyway, rain makes me pensive, so I flipped through a few of the journals where I noted details of our lives for about twenty-five years. 

There were some tough times, I'll tell you, but one thing I noticed was how I always ended with a positive note...using words like 'faith' and 'prayer' and 'blessings'. I remember some of those times vividly, the ache and the worry and the fogginess of the road ahead of us.

I love seeing it from this perspective, how the paths opened up and the sun came out again. I was reminded again that God has a plan, that he's got our backs, which is a helpful reminder right now when the road ahead has gone all foggy again.

Tom says I live in La-La Land, where there's always a silver lining and everything is hunky-dory. He says it like it's a bad thing.

But if we've prayed for God's guidance and truly trust him, how can we not think everything is hunky-dory, even if we can't see it from where we're standing at the moment?

 

 

5.

The proof of that hit home when I read through my notes written during my oldest son's heartwrenching high school years...and compare them to the joy and love I see on his face in the short video below of The. Most. Beautiful. Wedding. Ever. Amen. by amazing videographer Adam Grumbo. (I can't wait for the full video!) 

My prayers of so long ago have been answered. My mother-tears were not in vain.

(It takes a minute to buffer, so take my advice -  go grab a tissue while it loads...)

 

Five Things

1.

What a week full of tragedy, heartbreak, and heroism. First the bombing in Boston and subsequent acts of unselfishness and goodness that proved only light can conquer darkness...and that there's plenty of light in Boston. We witnessed it in the behavior of all of its citizens.

Next, the explosion in West, Texas, so close to home, where even more were killed and injured than in Boston. I've driven through that little town on my way somewhere else so many times, stopping for kolaches or to let the kids get rid of energy. In a tiny rural community like that a tragedy like this touches every resident and my heart goes out to them.

Now the earthquake in China. The numbers keep growing of those whose heartbreak is broadcast to all of us via the media...which means we can all pray for them. A universal prayer chain. An image glowing with light in yet another moment of darkness.

 

2.

I love sending cards to friends, but often don't have them on hand or the time to run out and buy one. So I decided to create my own...from my photographs and favorite quotes. I posted them on FineArtAmerica.com and placed my order. It arrived this week in a great box. 

I'm sending this one to all of those affected in #1, as well as anyone else reading this who is suffering loss right now.

 

 

"Oh heart, if one should say to you that the soul perishes like the body, answer that the flower withers, but the seed remains."

~ Kahlil Gibran

 

3.

Without excusing their behavior, I feel those two young men who planted the Boston bombs were merely pawns played by some greater evil who is sitting back, laughing at how they held us hostage for awhile and probably planning their next move. I pray I've raised my kids to be strong enough not to fall for false flattery, that they may never be manipulated in that way. 

4.

Just home from work yesterday evening, wondering where to get started on things I needed to do, one glance out the kitchen window put everything else on hold. A hawk perched in a tree overlooking our big pond ("big" only in comparison to our "little" pond; it's just a wide spot in a mostly dry creek right now, but it does have water!) I popped the 70-300mm lens on my camera and snapped a few through the window. Then I snuck out the front door, tiptoed around the corner, and managed to snap a few more before he swooped down to the pond. 

"Do you mind?"

They aren't great photos - he was pretty far away - but they're good enough to help me remember and be grateful that I stepped out of "to-do's" and just enjoyed the moment and this beautiful, amazing world around us.

 

5.

We're winding down to the Big Wedding of my son and his beautiful bride-to-be. For a long time the wedding was a year away, and now suddenly it's almost here! How does that happen?

So please don't forget me if I continue to be AWOL from your blogs for awhile, and negligent of emails and Facebook posts. But as my mom pointed out, Tommy's wedding is one of those once-in-a-lifetime things. A time to forget about the world and to-do lists and worries about the future, and focus, instead, on love and family and today.

"Once in awhile, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale." 

 
--Anonymous 

Five Things on (Good) Friday

1. Today is Good Friday, the day Christians around the world stop and consider the fact that an innocent person deliberately gave their life for them, out of love, even though they didn't ask him to and they did nothing to deserve it. Very sobering. 

But leave it to my friend Jim "Suldog" Sullivan to make me laugh about it. Go HERE to read his post about Good Friday.

2. I'm not sure how it happened, but earlier this week my computer and I somehow miscommunicated, resulting in a whole file of photos vanishing. I spent hours researching how to recover them, tried a few things with no luck, and finally spent $17 on a program called FileJuicer that managed to retrieve jpeg copies of my files.

I lamented the loss on Facebook, where a photographer friend/neighbor of mine told me he could retrieve the files from my card, even though I had already reformatted it. I tried not to get my hopes up, but hallelujah! he did it! All of the RAW photos were once again on my card, plus he gave me a copy of the program he used: Rescue Pro by Sandisk. And all it cost me was a 12-pack of Budweiser!

I call him Saint Bruce now. (Check out his beautiful photography at Bruce Coville Photography. The photo on the main page is the view of Lake Travis from his house.)

This is one of the files he saved. Every time I leave Houston I see this message and vow to capture it "next time". I finally remembered (eyes always on the road, don't worry!) and then promptly lost the file. Thanks again for rescuing it, Bruce!

3. My birthday is only a week and a day away. Last year my friends and family surprised me with the gorgeous iMac in front of me right now, telling me to use it to finish my book.

Well, I haven't, and I feel guilty.

4. Macy's put their Keurig coffeemakers on sale... almost half price, with a rebate! Since my old one kept bleeding all over my counter, I decided it was a sign I should get one. Happy birthday to me!

So far I'm loving it. I splurged and bought the little filter you can put your own coffee into. I drink way too much coffee to afford using those fancy k-cups all the time. They're only for company and emergencies!

5. I get to see 2/3 of my kids this weekend. 1/3 has tests next week and worried she wouldn't study if she came home. Sigh. But good decision. I guess.

Since half of the 2/3 is here already (plus my grandpuppy!) I'm finishing this up so I can go spend time with him. I hope you have a beautiful Easter weekend!

 

The outdoor Stations of the Cross at my church was finished enough for a group of us to make our way around this afternoon. Such a beautiful place. Easter blessings to all of you!

A Little Sister, a Shower, and a Salt Lick

I taught her how to drive a stick-shift - she caught on fast, much faster than my kids years later - and when her brother broke up with me, she wrote me poems to soothe my broken heart. She was barely a teenager back then, two years younger than me, and so in our split-high-school district, we never even attended the same school, so our lives went separate ways.

But score another one for Facebook! We recently reconnected. So when she came to Austin to visit her daughter this weekend, we made plans to meet up again for the first time in decades.

In a cool little restaurant within walking distance of her daughter's apartment (Fabi and Rosi) we sped through the years over wine and yummy food. The hours went way too fast. 

It meant missing a writing contest deadline and getting up at 5 a.m. yesterday morning to get my part of my future daughter-in-law's bridal shower ready, but it was totally worth it. Those are the moments that make life sweet!, and you have to grab them while you can.

Here are a few more sweet! moments from the past week...

 

 

Monday: writing before work; realizing you can still work geometry problems; a roaring wind on a sunny day; getting hooked by a good book

Tuesday: soft birdsong on your morning walk; a friend calling you with a job tip; your son's wedding invitation waiting for you in the mail; playing your drums after work

Wednesday: a puppy waiting patiently and hopefully outside the door for you to step outside and cuddle with her; devoting time to your book two days in a row; a long overdue hair cut and re-blonding; quick hugs from your daughter; remembering to pay some bills before they're late

 

 

Thursday: friends who make adorable favors for your future daughter-in-law's bridal shower; clearance racks; your husband still awake to help carry groceries into the house and help put them away at 10:30 pm

Friday: time to run before work; a refresher course in World Geography; starting the second book in the Hunger Games series, while getting paid; catching-up decades over dinner with an old boyfriend's little sister; experiencing another eclectic Austin restaurant

 

 

Saturday: a bridal shower for your future daughter-in-law; a Saturday night at the Salt Lick with your kids and great friends

 

 

Sunday: sleeping in and going to late Mass; the stories on CBS Sunday Morning

 

I don't watch much television, but CBS Sunday Morning is one show I try not to miss. This morning they featured the story of El Paso student Mitchell Marcus. Perhaps you've already heard it, but if you haven't, do yourself a favor and watch this video till the end. 

I hope you have a week filled with sweet! moments...and may we all be like this high school student and make life sweet! for someone else.

Five Things on Friday

 

 

1. Our property is dotted with small iron crosses, marking the resting places of so many precious furry or feathered or scaly loved ones we've been blessed to know. I miss them all. The one above is Charly's and Frankie's.

 

2. I will never get rich monetarily through my blog, but the friendships I've formed because of it are priceless. I've met so many supportive, encouraging, talented friends, and two of them have recently published books. I didn't hesitate to buy them because they are both wonderful, evocative writers, and I feel confident touting them here even though I haven't had time to read either one.  

Love Always Wags Its Tail, by Kathy H. Porter, is a collection of short essays about the dogs in her life. Wolf Pascoe shares what it's like being an anesthesiologist in Breathing for Two.

Follow the links to their blogs and you'll find information about the books. (I received no monetary compensation for these shout-outs - only friendship and support for my own writing.)

 

3. The next time you go out to eat and the place is packed and you start to get irritated because you feel your waiter is ignoring you, please take a deep breath, realize you are not the only customer in the place and that he/she can only do so much at one time, and please, please, please remember your manners. Thank you.

(Oh. And if the website suggests reservations, either make a reservation or don't get upset if you can't be seated. Especially if you're bringing 7 of your friends.) 

 

4. Back at the beginning of January, I decided I would start getting up at 4:30 a.m. instead of 5:30 a.m. so I would have time to work out and/or write before heading to work, if someone happened to call me out. (That's the life of a substitute teacher - you have to be flexible!)

Well, I finally did it. Once. This week. Yay, me!

 

5. For the past week or so, I've spent hours tormenting myself, listening to one You Tube video after another of potential songs for the mother/son dance at the upcoming wedding.

I just sat here at my computer and cried and cried. It was beautiful agony, I tell you, reliving those mom memories. But here's one that made me laugh, even though I wouldn't do this myself..

(Actually, that theme from the Ninja Turtles brings back so many memories, I almost started crying in this one, too!)

 

Nancy at A Rural Journal inspired me to start my Five Things on Friday, although I mutilated her better-alliterated version, 5 Facts Friday, so I encourage you to read hers and add your own if you're so inclined! And I remembered Mrs. 4444 has a regular Friday Fragments hop, so I'll be linking up there, too. It's a great way to tie up all those loose ends from the week!

Hope you have a great weekend!

Signs of Spring, and other Sweet!s

Like the Munchkins when Dorothy first arrives in the (movie) land of Oz, yellow flowers are popping up and peeking out at the world, one by one, to see if the coast is clear and the rumor is true..that the wicked old winter is gone.

(Not that our winters here around Austin, Texas are actually wicked, but I had to go with the theme.)

And last week I spotted a few American Robins up in the trees, another sure sign that Spring is headed our way, despite the lack of buds on the trees.  

(Obviously, the trees have grown cynical.)

 

Spring shows what God can do with a drab and dirty world.  ~Virgil A. Kraft

Here are a few more sweet!s that popped up in front of me this past week...

 

Saturday: watching old episodes of Dark Shadows with your son

Sunday: Mass with your son; celebrating friends' birthdays with margaritas and Mexican food, laughter and hugs; a long walk with your son and puppies; watching the Grammys for the first time in years

Monday: rain falling on the hills; working in a school library

Tuesday: drizzly mornings and mist on your face; homemade chocolate and peanut butter covered strawberries; wood-fire-oven-roasted veggies; crab cakes; a call from your oldest son; new running shoes

 

Wednesday: watching the sun rise on your morning walk; meeting interesting people; joining with your church family to celebrate traditions of your faith 

 

 

Thursday: a Mexican Jay escort on your morning walk; getting paid to watch a video on Fitness and Nutrition; a text from a friend letting you know about a job opening; finishing a project; Valentine's Day dinner with the love of your life

Friday: first graders, even when they stretch your patience; silence in a church filled with people praying; dancing the Cotton-Eyed Joe and the Schottische; waltzing; stars dusting the hilltops

Saturday: fresh pizza when you're famished; the giggle of leaves playing in the wind on a stone terrace; making a dent in your laundry and email after a week when you've barely been home

Sunday: a deep breath and a cup of coffee on the back deck before returning to the fast track; making surly customers happy; news that your son and his love completed the Livestrong Half Marathon with their personal best times; sitting on the back deck after work, sipping a glass of wine and pouring the characters and stories buzzing around in your head onto paper until it's too dark to see

Here's to another Sunday and another week full of sweet! moments waiting to pop up and surprise us! Keep your eyes open!

Share some of your own sweet!s from the past week in the comments. I love to hear them!

(Typepad's new spam-blocking system is still dumping 95% of comments, including my replies (!), into the spam folder. So don't worry if your comment seems to disappear! I'll retrieve it as soon as possible. Thank you!)

What is (Real) Love?

Love talked about can be easily turned aside, but love demonstrated is irresistible.~

W. Stanley Mooneyham
American minister and speaker, 20th century

 

I was bemoaning the fact that, despite hundreds of miles run, lunges lunged and squats thrusted, and losing enough weight that I could buy my bras in "training" sizes, I still have my grandmother's saddle-bag thighs.

"But you don't have any cellulite anymore," Tom told me.

"Really?"

"Yeah. Really."

The next day I looked for myself. Sigh. Just as dimpled as ever. I knew Tom hadn't been lying or merely trying to make me feel better; he just can't see worth crap anymore. 

But he also just doesn't care. He doesn't care that my hair is thinning. Heck, he wouldn't care if I went bald. He has never been able to tell when I'm wearing makeup or not (I've tested him)...so I'm sure my deepening wrinkles go unnoticed. He pays attention to me, he sees me...but it's the me on the inside...the me that he met and fell in love with despite himself almost 31 years ago. He looks past the "me" on the outside just as I look past the 55-year-old "him" on the outside and see the "him" who asked me for a dance at Diamondback so many years ago.

That's love.

With my son's wedding on the horizon, I've been thinking about married love and what makes it last - or not. Here are a few more...

...Love is the sound of drums coming from my house...fulfilling a wish I had tossed aside, believing it couldn't come true because there wasn't a spot for them in our new house. Tom surprised me with a set (thank you, Craig's List) on our anniversary a few years ago. It proved to me he pays attention. At least sometimes.

(Love is throwing him not one, but two surprise birthday parties...plus a huge family reunion/50th birthday party that lasted two weeks and involved having people sleeping on every square inch of the house, including on a mattress in the downstairs shower stall. Poor Kirby)

...Love is coming in the house from a long weekend, relieved to discover your coffee grounds from four days before have (thank the Lord!) been dumped and all the pieces are clean and dry, ready to go...despite the fact that your spouse doesn't drink coffee. (If he hadn't cleaned it for me...ooh, gross!)

(Love is picking up empty Dr. Pepper cans from all over the house...and outside...and biting my tongue. Pretty much.)

...Love is finding the coupon section of the Sunday newspaper separated for me, without asking.

(Love is gathering up the Sunday newspaper, at times from different rooms in the house, and putting it in the wicker basket where it goes.)

...Love is not minding that I plant myself in front of the computer every evening after dinner to write...and biting his tongue when he sees I'm on Facebook instead.

(Love is not minding that some nights he just crawls in bed and flips channels, instead of working on whatever project is in progress at the time, because he's physically and mentally worn out. He leaves the house at 5:30 am, for goodness sake!)

...Love is not being jealous about phone calls from old boyfriends, or emails from old boyfriends, or birthday lunches with old boyfriends.

(Love is not being jealous about his women friends and co-workers...even when he pinches Lisa's rear-end.)

...Love is always dancing the Cotton-Eyed Joe and the Schottische even though his hips and ankles still hurt from that accident in 1998.

(Love is sitting by his side in the hospital for a week, afraid to leave him...holding the urinal in place for an hour because he thinks he can go on his own...feeding him ice chips, sleeping on a fold-out chair, grateful for the sound of his snoring because it means he's alive.)

...Love is piecing together sections of workshop floor matting for me to lie on when I do sit-ups, so my tailbone doesn't get bruised anymore.

(Love is subscribing to Men's World e-newsletters and forwarding the good ones to him to keep him healthy.)

...Love is not nagging each other because the bathroom he/she is in charge of cleaning is a borderline health problem.

...Love is hanging on to and supporting each other through the illness and death of a parent, financial worries, and the never-ending ups and downs of having children.

...Love is saying to hell with everything that needs to be done around here to play ping-pong...or go for long walks along the creek...or travel virtually to Ireland or Istanbul or Italy with Rick Steves...

...Love is still joking around, still having fun, still laughing at each other and at ourselves after almost 32 years...and hoping we have at least another 32 together.

The proof of love is in the works. Where love exists, it works great things. But when it ceases to act, it ceases to exist.

~Pope St. Gregory the Great

 

 

What do you think "Love is..."?

Share with me! 

 
(If your comment doesn't show up right away, don't worry. Typepad's new anti-spam system is dumping them all into my spam folder. But I'll find them. Thank you!) 

 

This is re-post from 2010 that I spiffied up in honor of Valentine's Day and the 1st Annual Valentine's Day Boost-My-Blog Party hosted by a Rural Journal and Two Bears Farm. Follow the links to check out other participants.

Retreat! and Silver Linings

 

I took a quick overnight road trip with a friend Friday. We stayed in cute little apartments with screened porches set in a woodsy area full of walking paths... a great place to take deep breaths and relax and take a break from the rest of the world. There was wine, laughter, and great conversation.

It was my first Catholic retreat and I loved it! 

We gathered with our priest and the rest of our church pastoral, finance, and facilities council members, at Cedarbrake, a retreat center outside of Belton, Texas, that's owned and operated by the Austin Catholic Diocese. We were there to work on focus and team-building. 

The word 'retreat' often seems negative, triggering images of running away in fear instead of facing problems head-on. But to retreat from whatever pressures are weighing on you, for even a few hours, can be a life-saving move, especially if you've lost your sense of direction or your physical, mental, or spiritual arsenal is depleted. 

Just as time spent alone with yourself is important, if you're a member of any kind of partnership or group - marriage, families, friendships, even business associates - I think you need to step away together every once in awhile for a break from the routine pressures you're bombarded with, to strengthen your bonds and stock up that arsenal of love and compassion and forgiveness, don't you think?

Tuesday night I joined some friends for Chinese food and a movie. We saw "Silver Linings Playbook" with Robert DeNiro and Bradley Cooper (and a bunch of other great actors!)

I had no expectations going in because I'd only seen little clips of it and had no real idea what it was about. But I really loved this movie, and not just because Bradley Cooper has such dreamy blue eyes. Have you seen them...I mean it? 

Cooper's character has, well, some major issues, but to help him deal with life and move forward, he is trying to focus on the silver lining in every situation. It reminded me of looking for those sometimes elusive sweet! moments of each day. That could be why I liked it so much.

(Plus those blue eyes.)

But it's gotten several Academy Award nominations, so obviously other people agree with me. 

This has been a fast week, and the next one is going to fly by even faster. I'm doing my best to keep my eyes open for those sweet! moments, but I'm afraid a few still slip past. Here are the ones I noticed this week...

 

Monday: the pre-dawn silence of your hollow;  a friend dropping in to see your folks at the hospital; teenagers with good manners; a dog curled up, waiting for you by your front door; your dad's release from the hospital;  a summery evening on your porch in the middle of winter

Tuesday: an easy day at work; Chinese food and a movie with friends; Bradley Cooper's blue eyes

Wednesday: support from your friends when you step out on a limb; an afternoon with your daughter, even if it's just a trip to the grocery store; $400 in free jewelry

Thursday: sleeping in; a day spent totally at home; time for writing

Friday: Internet service, especially after losing it when your old modem dies; a road trip with a friend; the chance to get to know members of your church council better

 

Saturday:  Mass in a small chapel tucked into the woods; team-building sessions; a reflective walk through a labyrinth; the amazing way your husband sculpts stones for a terrace near your little pond 

Sunday: a morning walk with your puppies before Mass; kneeling in prayer beside your husband; sunlight streaming through stained glass; a husband who changes the oil in your car to make sure you're safe on a road trip to your parents

 

Every year we go to our friends' house for a big Super Bowl party, where I mostly sit at a table gabbing, catching up with friends, eating ribs and chili so spicy my mouth feels like it's on fire, with only an occasional glance at the television (usually for a commercial.) 

But this year I'm hitting the road (again) for a quick visit with my parents, to make sure my mom gets to a doctor appointment tomorrow. So there's a chance I might actually watch the Super Bowl tonight if I get there in time. I'm sure that's what will be on my parents' television!

Will you be watching and rooting for anyone? I hope no matter who wins, you have a great Sunday, full of sweet! moments! (To my blog friends...I'm hoping to get around to visit you soon! Thank you for your patience with me!)

 

 

Why I Love "The Hobbit"

 

 

He was five, snuggled up close beside me on the loveseat for our ritual bedtime story, sucking his thumb.

"Are you sure?" I asked him. "There aren't any pictures in this book. Just a lot of words."

He nodded, so I opened the worn paperback and began reading...

"In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit."

Every night I'd quiz him on what we had read the time before, worried he was too young to understand, but he always knew every answer and wanted to continue.  Middle Earth had come alive for him, so night after night, chapter by chapter, we journeyed through it together. 

It was my second, maybe third, visit. My brother had introduced me to Tolkien and his hobbits almost two decades earlier and I became obsessed, buying ceramic statues of Bilbo and Gandalf, pewter wizards, and tiny castles. I had dragon bookends and calendars depicting beautiful Middle Earth-inspired artwork. I embraced my nerdiness.

It was the artwork that hooked my young son. He wanted to learn more about that beautiful, adventurous world.

I traveled there again with my younger two, and many years later we watched the Lord of the Rings movies together. So when I heard about The Hobbit movie, I crossed my fingers they would all agree to see it with me, once again journeying together into Middle Earth.

And they did. This past Sunday evening, my Christmas wish came true.

 

 

But sitting in that theater I got much more than my Christmas wish. Watching the movie, I was reminded of why I became a Tolkien nerd so many years ago and still want to share it with my kids.

There's the obvious...the adventure, the magic, the intricate world he draws us into. His genius still amazes me.

There's the theme of good versus evil...with good victorious, of course. And the characters, who forge friendships by focusing on commonalities rather than differences, a great lesson for all of us.

There's Bilbo's story itself, how he ventures out of his comfort zone and discovers strengths he never knew he possessed. Now I can identify with Bilbo even more. Like me, he is middle-aged, settled, comfortable, and doesn't believe there is anything special about himself ... but he sets out on an adventure anyway.

He sticks with it even when others doubt him, determined to help the dwarves even though he doesn't really know them. Compassion is the key to his bravery and loyalty. As Gandalf says...

  “I found it is the small things, everyday deeds of ordinary folk, that keeps the darkness at bay. Simple acts of kindness and love.” 

When you boil it all down, the elves and the magic and the battles between good and evil, that single message is what you're left with. It's the reason I love The Hobbit, and why I wanted my kids to know it and love it, too. Because even the smallest of us, the seemingly least remarkable, is capable of kindness and love to one another. And I do believe that is the greatest power of all.

 

 

 

Lessons

Lord, take me where you want me to go;
Let me meet who you want me to meet;
Tell me what you want me to say; and
Keep me out of your way.

- Fr. Mychal Judge, FDNY (died 9/11/01)

 

 

Every year in late September, early October, I head to the coast with a group of friends for some beach therapy. Our annual adventure is coming up soon, in fact. We've gone every year since 1999 - except one. 

That September of 2001 we were counting down the days until we could wave goodbye to our families, ready for some alone time.... a few days not having to do anything for anyone but ourselves.

But on the afternoon of the 11th, we changed our minds. We no longer wanted to wave goodbye to our families - we wanted to wrap them around us, so close and tight we could feel their breath and smell their familiar sweetness.  

It wasn't a decision driven by fear. We knew the odds of some terrorist targeting our little Texas Hill Country town, or the little fishing town on the Gulf where we sought some peace and quiet, were slim to none.

But as that day progressed, we were reminded not to take our loved ones or the time we have with them for granted. Not to let a day go by without making sure they knew they were our whole world. Not to forget that every morning we may be opening our eyes to our very last day on this earth.

So that autumn we soaked up our families instead of the sunshine. We stayed close to home, pondered the changes in our country and our world. We prayed for peace.

But the next year we packed our swimsuits, sunscreen, magazines, Bloody Mary mix, and vodka, and headed for the beach. We've done so ever since. We continued our lives, relished our freedom, refusing to let fear mold our lives, for that would allow the terrorists to win. 

But we haven't forgotten the lessons we learned on September 11, 2001 and the days that followed, about the things that truly matter and the steel-strength of this nation. We haven't forgotten how we overcame our differences, although some days (especially around election time) it's hard to believe. We haven't forgotten those ordinary citizens who were called to be heroes - and accepted the call. We haven't forgotten that by going about our lives, speaking our minds and sticking up for one another, we are fighting a war - and winning.

 

 

 

 

"This day and every day. Tear us down and we WILL rebuild. Knock us down and we WILL arise. We are people of diverse faith, ideologies, and color. We may be distracted or divided by internal matters, such as politics, but we are America and we will remain." 

~Johnny "Happy" Valentine, veteran and teacher

Almonds and other sweet!s of the week

He was dirty and carried a cardboard sign ever closer to my car that said something like "Homeless Need a Job Hungry God Bless." 

I focused on the "hungry" and rolled down my window. My son was with me, so I felt safe.

"Would you like some almonds?" I asked, holding out a snack-sized ziplock bag full of them. I always have almonds with me to ward off hunger pains in a healthy way when I'm out running errands or on a trip. I hate being hungry.

"That would be great," he answered, taking them from me. "Thank you."

The light changed. I moved forward slowly, but he walked faster toward the intersection where his backpack rested. I saw him drop his sign, but then we were past, continuing our journey.

I couldn't see what happened next in his. I like to think he dropped to the grass and ate some almonds, that he really was grateful for them and not just begging for drug or alcohol money.

I also like to think another car came by with a legitimate job offer for him and that he took it and turned his life around and then helped another corner person get moving in the right direction.

It doesn't hurt to think big.

 

Saturday: seeing a photography friend you met while at work again; talking about writing with other writers; finally hearing Duck Soup; dancing; summer nights on a hill above a lake

Sunday: watching babies and little kids in church; helping a dear friend celebrate her birthday; a call from your son; watching a movie with your sweetie

Monday: a call from a friend, even though it was mostly full of sad news; a walk at dusk 

Tuesday: a glimpse of the Great Blue Heron and your duck family; watching your old puppy swim

Wednesday: being addressed as 'Young Lady' at the grocery store; a clean house; your husband alerting you to a painted bunting; forgetting all of your to-do's to just watch the birds at your feeder 

Thursday: watching a baby duck grow day by day; relaxed hours playing catch-up with a dear friend; joining a bunch of crazy middle-aged women for a midnight movie

Friday: getting to sleep in after a late night out; iced coffee on a hot summer day; $400 in free jewelry; pink clouds; sangria on a summer night

Saturday: a road trip with your son (double sweet!... going to see your parents!); an in-person hug from your sister; eating at a Mexican food restaurant you've been going to for almost 50 years

Sunday: the sound of rain; your daddy's bacon, eggs and biscuits for breakfast; someone stopping to see if you need help when you stop on the side of the road to take photos of old trucks; having almonds in your car to give to someone in need

 

I'm not sure how they end up out of work and hungry, possibly homeless, these corner people who stand near intersections holding signs and taking almonds or spare change from open windows.

Did they drop out of school, like me? Are they habitual liars, to others and themselves, to the point that their families had to distance themselves? Do they even have families, a mother or father whose heart aches with worry and helplessness? Did one mistake lead to another and another until the weight of that burden crushed the possibility of any other chances or hope for better, and their only relief is from drugs or alcohol? Has misplaced pride bound them in its chains?

It's easy to jump to conclusions. To judge.

But I think it's a better use of time to smile and share your almonds, to say a prayer for the corner people and then one of thanks for all of your own blessings, like a job and home and family, and to vow never to take them for granted. 

Because for all of us, life can change in an instant.

Just another good reason to keep track of the sweet! moments in each day... and to carry extra almonds in your car.

 

Sweets On Christmas Eve Eve

Who is rich? He that rejoices in his portion.

~The Talmud

Dishes overflow the kitchen sink.

Fudge waits in a lined pan to be cut into squares and shared.

Three twenty-something kids and I huddle around a laptop within the glow of Christmas tree lights, laughing at You-Tube videos.

Favorite cookies fill gold and silver tins, tumble off of plates and cool on a metal rack on the kitchen counter... Chocolate Chip, courtesy of TG, while I made a last minute dash to the grocery store, and peanut butter Cyclops Cookies by me, assisted by Daniel.

I haven't taken one single photograph. The one above was taken earlier this week.

There are no gifts piled under the tree... the cookies are our gift. Our laughter is our gift. We are our gift.

I'm headed out in the morning with my kids, leaving Tom behind to care for the puppies... his gift to me. For the first time in decades, I'll wake Christmas morning in my childhood home and enjoy Christmas dinner with my parents. What better gift could I receive? 

 

And now for a few my sweet! moments of the past week. I hope you've gathered a nice, shiny collection yourself!

 

Sunday: placing your gifts under the church Giving Tree, imagining the faces of two 9-year-old boys when they open the gifts you bought for them; recovering treasured ornaments you thought were lost forever; fresh tamales and guacamole; your son's rants about the commercialization of Christmas

Monday: rainy days (good for writing); getting back to work on a dusty project; forgiving scales after a week of peanut butter and chocolate bars

Tuesday: tangerine sunrises framed in a window; brisk mornings and frisky dogs; listening to your daddy's stories; your pop-in-law finally released from the hospital; Pinterest, at last!; chili so spicy it makes your brow sweat on a cold night

Wednesday: your husband and daughter home with you, but quiet enough that you can still write; your college student child getting the official report of good grades for her past (really tough!) semester

Thursday: walking along a fog-shrouded country road; driving on a two-lane highway that zigs, zags, rises and falls over and through the hills; a surprise Christmas bonus; Lammes dark chocolate pecan and caramel Longhorns; a glass of wine and a movie with your son after seven nonstop hours on your feet

Friday: warm chocolate chip cookies baked by your daughter; your son helping you bake his favorite cookies; the mailroom scene in Elf; all three of your kids home, laughing over You-Tube videos and watching movies

Saturday: traveling with all three of your kids; Christmas Eve spent with your parents for the first time in decades

Another very special sweet... Kamana of Journalling Through Photos recently posted a series of "Six Question" interviews with women bloggers. I was honored and humbled that she asked me to participate.

Go HERE to read the interview, but be sure to stay there awhile... meet the other bloggers she interviewed and also take a stroll through Kamana's beautiful poetry and photographs. Thank you again, Kamana!

I wish all of you a blessed Christmas, filled with peace and joy, love and laughter...

I'm also joining Otto at Münchow's Creative Photo Blog in challenging each of you to use Christmas to make a difference in someone's life who, instead of love and joy during these holidays, feels despair or sadness. Perhaps they've lost a job or a loved one or have just forgotten the meaning of the season. Even if all you do is smile at a stranger, try to do something. ("...it might be the only sunshine they see.")

I'm challenging myself as well.

Christmas is not as much about opening our presents as opening our hearts.

~Janice Maeditere

Peacemakers, Busybodies and the Fine Art of Forgiveness

Saturday night Tom and I watched Riding in Cars with Boys, an old Drew Barrymore movie from 2001.

I missed it in 2001, along with a lot of other movies that came out during that time, plus or minus 3 years. We were busy with kids and preparing the foundation for our house.

If you're like me and missed it back then, in a nutshell Drew plays a smart girl who gets pregnant at 15 back in 1965. It devastates her family, especially her father, so hoping to make peace, and against her better judgement, she sets her dreams of going to college aside and marries the father of her child. He ultimately becomes a drug addict. 

Based on a memoir by Beverly D'Onofrio, it's not so much a tragedy, though, as a story of friendship, determination, and ultimately, forgiveness. The ending caught me by surprise and I cried - not just "teared up" but cried as the credits rolled.

It was a good, cleansing cry, though... tears that are triggered by hope.

That's what I took away from the movie, a message of hope that love is so strong, it can survive for years buried deeply under pride, hurt feelings, disappointment... all of those feelings you open yourself up to when you allow yourself to love or even just care about another person. I think it's that impression they make on your soul that can't be filled or matched by anyone else or anything.

But relationships can't stay the same, because we don't. We're constantly changing and so is everyone else. 

When you accept that ... when you don't take other people's decisions personally... when you don't clog up the connection between you with pride, you're usually able to hang on to that relationship, at least in some form.

It probably won't be the same.  It might be better... it might be less. But without it, you won't be wholly yourself. There are extreme situations, of course, cases of physical or mental abuse, but I'm just talking about ordinary friendships and families that get tugged and pulled and stretched thin by life. 

In the movie, the characters finally stopped focusing on the things that separated them. They each chose to reach through all of the junk they'd piled up between them and at the moment they connected, those piles became dust, losing their importance. It took a lot of courage, knocking aside all of that pride, but the movie points out how rewarding it can be when we muster that courage to forgive. Totally worth the risk.

 

I believe we are each the sum of other people.

I believe every cell of our body connects us to family, past and present... Every person we encounter in life, each friend who touches our heart, leaves an impression on our souls... The books we read, movies we watch, songs we hear, become filed in the library of our minds, words and thoughts given to us by another for us to ponder and use to tweek our own thoughts and apply to our experiences.

We are all connected, yet we are also unique, because no one has the same combination... We are each on a different adventure, following our own distinct path that might overlap and twist tightly with another's but will never be exactly the same.

 

And that's why I've been sticking my nose into other people's business lately, even before I watched the movie. 

I resisted, believe me. I think there are times when you just need to mind your own business.

But two dear friends of mine who once-upon-a-time were the best of friends to each other had a falling out a few years ago. Somewhere along the way, something happened. I don't know what... I only know that one decided to cut off all communication with the other and I was left in the middle.

My friendship with each continued just as it had. It went on that way for years, but something came over me this week and I stuck my nose into the void with an email, asking for some kind of communication with the other. I didn't ask what happened to cause the rift. I don't need to know. That truly is none of my business. But as their friend, I believe their friendship is my business and I should at least try to help them make some kind of re-connection for their own sakes and peace of mind. 

It's possible I've lost a friend over this, but I couldn't stand sitting back and witnessing this any longer without trying to do something.

And then it happened again. I found out that two friends of mine who I knew had been really good friends not too long ago had drifted apart. One told me his emails and phone calls had gone unanswered, so he had just accepted it and moved on, although he had no idea what had happened or if he had caused offense in some way. It had been three years.

I couldn't help myself. I sent an email to the other one. Turns out, the second friend had been going through a tough time; his mother had dementia/alzheimer's and he had spent all of his free time caring for her. In the meantime, the first friend had changed emails and phone numbers and wasn't on Facebook, so he had given up trying to contact him.

I provided all of the contact information and stepped back, with a good feeling in my heart.

So be forewarned... I'm a busybody and not ashamed of it. You're important to me.

Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. ~ Matthew 5:9

 

Disclaimer: I'm not trying to be holier than thou. Even at the moment, I have a nephew who isn't speaking to me because of an argument we had a few years ago. I believe in forgiveness and acceptance, but not in letting other people take advantage of you or lie about you. 

God says "Love your neighbor as yourself", which to me says we first have to love and respect ourselves in order to love others. 

But I do believe in giving others the benefit of the doubt, accepting their humanity and flaws (and hoping they accept ours), and trying to understand what they're going through.

Most of all, I believe in forgiveness and the power of love.

So you should know that if you don't want me to be your friend, you're going to have to work really, really hard at it. I don't let go of people easily.

We do not need to seek for love, we only need to seek and remove the barriers we have built against it. ~ Rumi

Dona Nobis Pacem (Blog Blast for Peace 2011)

There is no way to peace. Peace is the way.

~A.J. Muste
Dutch Reverend and Christian Pacifist, 20th century

 

(We owe it to them, don't you think?)

Dona Nobis Pacem

(Grant us Peace.)

Linking up with the 2011 Blog Blast for Peace. Will you join us?

 

Have a Groovy Day, Baby!

How can you not have a groovy day when you start it by sipping coffee from this Flower-Power, Love and Peace-ful cup?

It came straight from the Museum of Bethel Woods in Woodstock, New York, to me, via my sweet friend Mary Kay, and sends me straight back to my bedroom in the '60's when my walls, clothes and anything I could pop a sticker on were covered with some variation of these words, colors and patterns.

I won't get into all the reasons why Mary Kay bringing me a souvenir were totally unnecessary. I'll just say "Thank you, Mary Kay! I love it!" and leave it at that.

I hope all of you have a groovy, love-and-peace-filled Wednesday!

Each Day

Lord, take me where you want me to go;
Let me meet who you want me to meet;
Tell me what you want me to say; and
Keep me out of your way.

- Fr. Mychal Judge, FDNY (died 9/11/01)

 

This morning, while thousands of names were solemnly read, one by one, at Ground Zero, two babies were baptized in our church.

This evening I'll help celebrate a dear friend's birthday with Mexican food and margaritas.

In between, I've been remembering...

Ten years ago I was one of millions watching in disbelief as our country came under attack. Do you remember that feeling as we pulled together in the days that followed? We changed the way we did things, for sure, but we kept on living our lives, refusing to let our attackers control us with fear. 

Living each day, deliberately and free. Remembering but moving forward, only leaving room for light and happiness and love. That's our victory.

 

"...Terrorist attacks can shake the foundations of our biggest buildings, but they cannot touch the foundation of America. These acts shatter steel, but they cannot dent the steel of American resolve.

America was targeted for attack because we're the brightest beacon for freedom and opportunity in the world. And no one will keep that light from shining.

Today, our nation saw evil, the very worst of human nature, and we responded with the best of America, with the daring of our rescue workers, with the caring for strangers and neighbors who came to give blood and help in any way they could..."

~President George W. Bush

 

 

Thinking of Peace and Sweet!ness

I have an unexpected day off tomorrow. I'm getting dizzy trying to decide what to do with it! Do I focus on "getting stuff done" or just relax and have fun? I imagine it will fall somewhere in between. I think I'll just start somewhere and see where it leads me. Who knows what I'll get done?

Whatever I decide to do, in the back of my mind I'll be remembering the events of the day ten years ago and giving thanks that those who wanted to destroy our country haven't succeeded.

The candle I light at Mass tomorrow morning will be for our country...

...for the victims of 9/11.

...for our soldiers and leaders.

...for those who hate our country.

...for peace. 

 Peace demands the most heroic labor and the most difficult sacrifice. It demands greater heroism than war. It demands greater fidelity to the truth and a much more perfect purity of conscience.

~ Thomas Merton

 

And now for some of the Sweet! moments of my week: 

Sunday: learning part of the San Antonio Spurs Cheerleader audition dance; sitting in a hot tub beneath a sky full of stars and a 3/4 moon; almost winning at beer pong; spending time with 2/3 of your kids

Monday: mimosas and breakfast tacos; rope swings and cold rivers; a swingset built sturdy enough for grownup-size kids; high temperatures in the low 90s; no wildfires near your house

Tuesday: coolness of a new autumn morning; no dogs in the laundry room; still no wildfires near your house

Wednesday: reading in a hammock; spotting the doves you feared were the victims of dove season (see above); sneaking photos of birds visiting the birdfeeder; glorious blue skies

Thursday: mornings cool enough to sip coffee and read on the front porch; sneaking more photos of mountain jays and doves; meeting a book review deadline; eating Chinese food and watching "The Help" with friends you don't see often enough 

Friday: leftover Chinese food; a long-overdue phone visit with your sister; sitting on the front porch in the evening, listening to music with your husband and son

Saturday: an early morning walk with your husband and puppies; catching live footage of Lynyrd Skynyrd singing "Free Bird" on Cool TV; assurance that friends who live near current wildfires haven't been affected by the fires; an Andy Garcia movie from '95

I wish you Peace and a week full of Sweet!s!

"You comin', Mom?"

Just Three Things (and a Friday Favorite Photo)

I'll be traveling today, driving miles of highway in my air-conditioned car, singing along to the radio, probably dancing in my seat and drumming on the steering wheel, perhaps swerving off the road to capture something in my camera (because I can do that when I travel alone.)

(Don't worry, Mama I promise I'll be careful.)

But there are three things I want to share with you before I leave...

First...

Have you see the previews for Larry Crowne, that movie with Tom Hanks as a middle-aged college student and Julia Roberts as a teacher? I really want to see it because I've been an "older" student off and on for 20 years. (Currently "off" because we don't have the money right now.) I get the feeling Tom Hank's experience is a little different than mine has been, but I still want to see the movie, because, well, it's Tom and Julia.

Plus I haven't been to the movies in quite a while and I'm craving it. I enjoy watching movies here at home, but there's just something different about sitting there in a theater with that big screen in front of you, speakers blaring so loudly you (hallelujah!) can't hear the couple behind you talking.

Okay, actually I crave movie popcorn. But I really do want to see this movie.

I discovered two bloggers who might make that happen for me, and if not me, then maybe you. If you're interested in winning tickets to see Larry Crowne, then go to MidlifeBloggers or The Fifty Factor and follow their directions. Pretty much, you just have to leave a comment and later a winner will be picked by random selection. I hope it's me. Or you. (And if it's you, I hope you take me with you.)

Even if you're not interested, you should go read Joanna's blog post at The Fifty Factor that leads up to the giveaway. Hilarious!

Second...

This one is for all you movie-loving, screenwriting, film producing readers out there. A few months ago, my creative and multi-talented high school friend Byron Tully, along with his friend Weatherford Bradley, created Indie Friendlie, a site that showcases filmmakers and films who don't have the budgets or marketing departments to get them into theaters. There were a few glitches with the initial site, but I'm happy to report Indie Friendlie is back, even better than before! If you're a film lover of any kind, go check it out!

Third...

You need to go read this post by Gail at Louisiana Belle that I read yesterday. It's a wonderful post about graciousness, as in being gracious to someone even though you'd really rather throttle their neck, based on Gail's personal experience with a certain person. It teaches a great lesson, but besides that, it's an honest and funny post, one of those that will stay with me, especially when I want to throttle someone's neck.

Here's the link: Noreen Update.

Go check it out, but first, take a look at my Friday Favorite Photo of the week...

There are only a scattered few of these stubborn yellow flowers continuing to bloom against the odds. I don't know how long they can hold out, so I chose this photo of one especially bold bloom as my favorite of the week.

Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

 

 

 

Thanks to you...

...I slept in this morning, until the impatient sunlight pestered me awake.

...I walked with the dogs along a country road, safe and free.

...I'll spend time in the sunshine, share a bountiful meal, maybe play some ping-pong with my kids. 

Thanks to you...

...I grew up in a country where I (mostly) make my own choices.

...I live in a land where my dreams are limited only by my own lack of creativity, ambition and drive.

...my children face a future where almost anything is possible.

...I'm free to live my life because you gave your own.

I promise I won't forget. I promise I won't take it for granted.

I promise your sacrifice won't be wasted on me.

Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.

~Gladys Bronwyn Stern

 

 

Fable of the Porcupines (or, Be Grateful for the Pricks in Your Life)

It was the coldest winter ever. Many animals died because of the cold.

The porcupines, realizing the situation, decided to group together. They were covered and protected, but the quills of each wounded the closest companion. After a while, they decided to distance themselves, and they began to die, alone and frozen.

So they had to make a choice: Either accept the quills of their companions or disappear from the earth. Wisely, they decided to go back to being together. They learned to live with the little wounds that were caused by their close relationships because the most important part was the heat that came from the others.

They were able to survive. 

The best relationship is not the one that brings together perfect people,

but the one that forms when individuals learn to live with the imperfections

and admire the good qualities of others. 

The Moral of the story: 

LEARN TO LOVE THE PRICKS IN YOUR LIFE.

This was floating around Facebook yesterday. I loved it so much I had to post it here, too, just in case there were a handful of people who didn't catch it yet. I originally spotted it on the Texas Hill Country page - I'm not sure where it originated. I snagged the photo from the same page - not sure if it's a baby porcupine or hedgehog, but who cares? It's prickly and precious!

Reflections on a Good Friday

I stepped out this morning to a world, well, not quite washed clean, but at least refreshed.

Sometime during the night or this morning, it rained, leaving this puddle full of reflection on the porch like a mysterious gift.

The rain settled the dust and I'm trying hard to do likewise with my thoughts that are eager to whirl away in every direction like so many dust devils.

I'm trying to keep a firm grip on them, trying to be full of focused, calm reflection myself today, like the gift of pooled raindrops outside.

Today is Good Friday, a day Christians around the world honor as the day Christ died on the cross for our sins. So why do we call it "good"? Several people posted the answer on Facebook, better than I could say it:

In the original language, 'good' meant 'holy'. It is good because on that day, Christ died for us while we were still sinners. Without His sacrifice we could not be reconciled to God! Remember Him today and give thanks for what He did for us.

On Good Friday and again on Easter Sunday, we're reminded of miracles and opposites, like an errant rain cloud in a drought-cursed sky showering blessings on your dusty soul when you least expect it. 

I've got a zillion errands to run today, so many things to try to take care of and I still won't even make a dent in my to-do lists, but I'm going to try to hang on to these reflections today as I head into the Easter weekend.

Peace to you!

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son,

that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

– John 3:16 (King James Version)

 

Faith, Hope, Love (what would I do without my friends?)

 

"At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us."

~ Albert Schweitzer

My friend Jillsy sent this to me last week -  my prize for contributing the most bird photos to her Tweet Around the World blog hop. I was expecting a set of her beautiful cards (she creates greeting cards from her photographs) and that would have been wonderful, so this was a huge surprise, and of course, just what I needed.

All I could think was, how did she know? How did she know I needed this boost, this reminder, this encouragement? 

Some days I feel I'm going crazy, trying to do too much, chase too many dreams at once. I wonder if I should just give up and be practical, focus on making money now rather than pour my time and energy on a maybe later. But there's a clock ticking in my brain that I can't stop; it makes it tough to put those dreams off any longer. Yet I know we need money now, so I also take on projects and jobs that will pull in the green right away.

Jillsy says she has a placque just like it and she keeps it near her desk so she can look at it often, draw inspiration and strength from it, and keep going. She knows me well enough now to know I need it, too, I guess.

For now, mine is waiting to be hung on the wall in my future office, a constant reminder of her encouragement and support.

 

***************************************

 

Saturday afternoon I met a group of friends for a late lunch - they called it my birthday lunch, and that was fine. I'll use any excuse to get together with them.

But they got me a gift, and even though I should be upset with them for it, how can I? They pitched in together to get me this...

 

Yes, Photoshop Elements 9! Can you believe it? I still can't! When I opened the box, I'm sure my jaw dropped.

I bet I even drooled a little.

For their part, I think they realized I wasn't going to stop posting photos of them on my blog and Facebook, and they figured this was as much a gift for themselves as it was for me; I can whittle a few pounds here, smooth a few wrinkles there, snip the gray hair.

And I promise, girls, I will! Thank you, thank you, Darla, Rae, Leslie, Gwen, Debbie and Donna!

As if that wasn't enough, they also gave me these...

...a wine stopper and a cross magnet (do they know me or what?) and framed reminder of the love of my friends and the faith they have in me - the faith I need to have in myself.

 

**********************************************

 

I've often used the "pebble in a pond" analogy when trying to illustrate consequences to my kids - every action we make creates ripples that affect other people. Good actions equal good ripples, bad actions equal bad ripples. 

I didn't state it as eloquently or elaborate on it as far as Baron Batch did in his beautiful essay on those ripples. My friend Berniece emailed it to me recently, along with this note: My father found this in the paper, then my sister mailed it to me. I will be having my students read it in class. Very inspiring, just like your writing. Love, Berniece 

After I read it, I was humbled by Berniece's words, because Batch's essay is so good. It was also just what I needed to read. Full of hope and encouragement to never give up.

What a wonderful ripple from Berniece.(Read Batch's essay HERE.)

 

***************************************************

 

Okay, I started this post earlier in the week and planned to finish it up last night. 

But yesterday, mentally and inspirationally drained by a day's work, I opened my mailbox and found it stuffed and overflowing with more faith, hope and love.

First, this beautiful package from my friends Shari and Robert...

I hated to unwrap it, it was so beautiful!

But I did, and look what I found...

Shari knows I love vintage roses (I have a 'Rose' bathroom!) and also, see that bit of lace at the top? ... it's a remnant of a doily handmade by her grandmother - how much more inspiring can that be, to have her give me a bit of her own grandmother's love?

But that's just Shari and Robert. I'm lucky.

 

****************************************************

 

A large box took up most of the mailbox. Inside I found another beautifully wrapped package...

...a gift from my creative, artistic friend Annie K.

She knows what I love, too - this is a hand-decorated journal, full of blank pages waiting for my thoughts, and sweet, encouraging reminders on the outside... 

Thank you, Annie!

 

************************************************

 

This morning I sat at the computer to really and truly finish this post ... but, ever the procrastinator, decided to first glance at my emails.

One from Jillsy caught my eye right away: "OMG!!!!!!!!!" was the subject. Inside, in all caps, she let me know Pioneer Woman had chosen my photo, one of my brother Donnie, for Group 3 of her Brothers Photo Assignment. It's one of a series I took of him for a blog post just as he pulled up to our house on his Harley, after an adventure to Montana last year.

Having it selected was sweet, but what made it sweeter were these words from Jillsy: "I'M OVERJOYED!" She's the one who introduced me to Flickr, Pioneer Woman Photography, and so much more.

(So many ripples she has sent my way.)

When I added the photo, I really had no hope of it being selected. 

Well, I guess I had a little hope, sprinkled with teensy seeds of faith in miracles.

This is proof that dreams can come true. Maybe it's a little dream, but they count, too - they're what keep you moving to the big ones.

 

 

So I'll keep dreamin' ... thanks to my friends.

And I'll try to do a better job sending out ripples of encouragement, faith, love and hope.

You keep dreamin' too! 

Take it from me - they just might come true!

(I added this post to focus52 - this week's theme is 'Hope'. Click HERE to see the other contributions.)

 

Life and Death - a Cycle of Celebration

Tiny almond-shaped eyes - chocolate drops full of innocence, ignorant of the violence that brought us all together - peered at me over her mother's shoulder.

She wore a yellow romper and sky blue bonnet, such a contrast to the black and white donned by the rest of us who formed a circle of love and support to a grieving mother, father, sister, brothers...

Black and white. Bad and good. Death and life. Sadness, happiness. 

Yellow and blue, colors of springtime, of rebirth, echoed in the sprays of flowers edging the site, and the flowers plucked from the stands and tossed onto the casket.

We had seen a short blurb on the Sunday evening news about the stabbing that left two dead over the weekend in Austin. A gathering of friends to remember the third-year anniversary of the death of one man's mother, an argument, a drawn knife, two dead, several wounded. So tragic, so sad, but soon forgotten in the rush of our lives.

It was several days before Tom learned via email that one of the victims was the little brother of a friend, a former co-worker at a small engineering company, where the employees became like family and stayed in touch over the years.

She was the big sister of six little brothers, a surrogate mom as the family followed her to the Austin area. Tue was the youngest, still her baby brother at 28.

His funeral Saturday morning was one of the most beautiful I've ever witnessed - a full Catholic Mass, all in Vietnamese. Thanks to the unity and consistency of the Catholic Mass tradition, we could still follow along, understanding with our hearts if not our ears.

We filed to Communion along either side of his casket, and it struck me how appropriate it was, a reminder of the life after death we all profess to believe, a reminder of the communion of saints.

After the service, we joined in the procession to the cemetery, where I spotted Miss Innocence dressed in Springtime. I also noticed a young boy, probably about 4 or 5, and I knew Tue's sister, mother, father and other friends and family who watched him grow must be remembering him at that age, when the thought that he could be taken from them by such senseless violence years later was unfathomable.

Nothing is lost by peace; everything may be lost by war. ~ Pius Xll

They probably already knew the truth of this statement better than most, those who escaped war-torn Vietnam in hopes of a peaceful life for their family.

I couldn't understand the words spoken at the grave site, but I understood the gestures, the faces contorted in sorrow, the wails of his mother that touched my mother's heart and brought tears to my eyes for her pain and loss. Tue was just a few years older than my oldest son.

One brother hobbled on crutches, injured while trying to break up the fight to protect his little brother. Tue was also about the same age my brother Buster was when he became a victim of a violent act, only his was a gunshot. Buster didn't die right away; he spent several years as a quadriplegic before we lost him.

I still feel that loss, and my sister's heart wept for Tue's sister and brothers. 

After the service, we joined Tue's friends and family at a luncheon. The need to join with others, remember, laugh, celebrate transcends religions and cultures. We spoke to Tue's family and friends, including one who was there that night ... the night two of his friends were killed. 

Please keep them all in your prayers.

Tom dropped me off later at a restaurant just a few miles down the highway for a birthday lunch with dear friends. Despite being stuffed from delicious eggrolls, crab soup and shrimp salad, I savored the meal I shared with them and our Mexican Martini toast.

After a morning of such forceful reminders of life's fragility and uncertainty, their faces and the sound of their laughter felt more precious to me than ever.

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal. Love leaves a memory no one can steal.

~ a headstone in Ireland

 

 

Fall into Me

This morning I planted prayer requests in my virtual world; within moments, sweet thoughts and assurance of prayer blossomed before my eyes.

I believe prayer is powerful, and I believe the prayer and good wishes that joined my own today get a lot of the credit for my sister's surgery being so successful. Full recovery is still far down the road before her, and she'll be moving pretty slow in her walker for several months to get there, so I'm asking you to please continue to pray, send good thoughts, and whatever else you can think of to help her along this next phase of the journey.

Almost every day on the news, you can find a story about how people don't know how to really connect to one another anymore, not in a personal way, because we're too busy texting or emailing or chatting on Facebook or posting on blogs...

Well, obviously, I disagree. I feel more connected to my friends, family and the world in general than ever. Many of the responses today came from people I only know in the virtual world. So what if I've never met you in person? It doesn't make our connection any less real or sincere. It's that something inside of us that matters.

 "You don't have a Soul. You are a Soul. You have a body." ~ C.S. Lewis

One friend I've met through our shared love of photography, Debbie, sent me an email assuring me she would keep all of my requests in her prayers. She also included a link to a video, a song by Sugarland that I wasn't familiar with ... a beautiful song of reassurance and hope, a reminder to everyone on my prayer list that they aren't alone in their struggle, that someone's there to help them through and hold them up.

When I hear it, I think of Christ, but it could also relate to a best friend, a parent, or even the person behind a name on Facebook, FlickR or a blog.

Thank you, Debbie!

I'm including it below in case you want to hear it, too. This is a quick, sloppy post, but I wanted to say thank you for all of your prayers and good wishes. They truly made a difference today as I waited, watching the clock, knowing Brenda was on the operating table, wondering how she was doing. And they helped as I mourned a man I still think of as a boy, and the brother he left behind. And because I believe in prayer, I know they will help lift the fog of depression from my friend's heart. 

 

Praying

Prayer weaves its way throughout my being, throughout my day ... a strong fiber holding the pieces together, supporting me, lifting me ... a light breaking the darkness, revealing blessings, allowing hope.

Today, and for the next several days, weeks, months, I'm asking for your prayer to join mine... 

• About the time most of us are eating lunch today, my sister Brenda will be in surgery for a fractured hip. She's not sure how long it's been fractured - she's been in pain for awhile, trying not to go to the doctor until her Medicare kicked in (why is there a gap between approval and coverage?) Yesterday the pain finally became too great to put off any longer.
  • Please pray for the surgeon, for quick healing, for patience (she's facing two months of immobilization!), for my parents (she'll be staying with them) and for Medicare to declare this an emergency, bump up the start date, and cover the cost of surgery. Apparently they do that sometimes. I hope this is one of those times.
• Someone near to my heart is struggling, trying to find answers and relief to bouts of depression. Please lift them up ... pray that they are able to fight and escape the dark fog that envelopes their heart and mind right now. Help them focus on the bright areas and feel the love surrounding them.
• Another person near to my heart is dying. Although I haven't seen him in years, in another, younger life of mine, his family became my second one - I consider him my little brother. Please keep him in your prayers as he faces this next journey. Also please pray for strength and peace for his older brother - he'll be losing the last surviving member of his immediate family. 
  • Just received word that he passed this morning. Please pray for the repose of his soul, and for his brother and friends.

Thank you.

 

 Unceasing prayer means to have the mind always turned to God with great love,

holding alive our hope in God,

having confidence in God whatever we're doing and whatever happens to us.

~ St. Maximus the Confessor

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I am bringing my mustard seed of faith to prayer

just by showing up,

no matter how reluctant, ill prepared, or distracted I am in the moment.

~ Alice Camille

In Silence

I stepped out this morning to a world washed by a silent rain. It surprised me, seeing the puddles on the porch and the drops glistening in the trees. I hadn't expected it to rain last night, didn't hear it tapping on our metal roof.

How much more surprised the people of Japan must have been when the earthquake shook their world and the tsunami silently followed...

Images from a video posted on Facebook that reveals the incredible power of the tsunami keep flashing in my mind. Click on the link HERE - it lasts about 6 minutes, but be sure to watch it until the very end. (I hope you can see it. You might need to be signed into Facebook.)

The man who posted it lives in Japan and has started a Facebook page where he continues to post information. Click HERE to see his page. 

Huffington Post published an article listing ways to help the victims (click HERE) and Austin's own SXSW created a website in collaboration with the American Red Cross. Click HERE to check it out. (SXSW, or South by Southwest, is a music, film, interactive festival going on here right now.)

If nothing else, please join me in continuing to pray for the country of Japan and all of its people. 

 

Ashes to ashes...

...dust to dust. Tonight I'll be reminded of my mortality ... of the swiftness of life ... of my transgressions.

No need to remind me of my mortality. Lately, I'll be going about my business and then suddenly I have this impression, or perhaps you could even call it a vision, of my life in relation to the past and the future, and I see so clearly that it's just a blink of eternity's eye. If even that.

I think of all who have gone before me, and those who will come after.

I wonder about my life, if it's made any kind of difference in this world at all. I see that all this stuff we've accumulated and worried about really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things.

And I do all of that reflecting in one breath, one heartbeat.

In the next, I vow (once again) to make each moment I'm given matter. To not take a single one for granted. I figure that way, I might fall short of the goal, but I'll be closer than if I didn't shoot big.

I'm keeping my stuff, though. Or at least most of it.

Sometimes I wish I didn't think so much.

A reminder of my transgressions ... now, that's probably necessary, and more often than once a year. It ties in with my vow of making each moment matter, of trying to make a difference in this world.

I came across this quote today and I think it's appropriate for the Lenten season. Well, anytime, but now is a good time to start. And of course, I believe it applies to everyone, not just Christians, don't you? Where it says "Christian", just insert "Peaceful"...

If we truly wish to be Christians,

we must love peace,

we must make our own the cause of peace,

we must meditate on the real meaning of peace,

we must conform our minds to the thought of peace.

~Pope Paul VI
Italian pontiff, 20th century

Peace be with you.

 

Saying thank you ... and goodbye.

I spent two days witnessing love and friendship poured back upon a family mourning a husband, father, son, brother, uncle.

A whole community grieved over the loss of one man, joined by family and friends who had traveled thousands of miles to pay their respects, impressing upon me visually what an amazing difference one man can make in the lives of so many by living life to the fullest, believing the impossible is do-able, and just being a friend.

(Imagine the difference in the world if we all did the same.)

Love of family, love of community, love of the life we're given - I think that's what Carl would want all of us to remember.

I won't forget.

 

Life is to be fortified by many friendships.
To love and to be loved is the greatest happiness of existence.

~Sydney Smith

 

 

In the darkest of times, laughter helps revolutionize our perspective.

~ Phil Callaway

 

a few of Carl's Eagle Scouts (all grown up) and fellow leaders...

[Love] bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails.

1 Corinthians 13:7-8

...especially with the support of friends.  Please continue to keep Carl's family in your prayers. 

 

The following video of the Missing Man formation was recorded by one of Carl's Eagle Scouts. The video below it features the lone bagpiper playing "Amazing Grace" on the runway...

 

 

Goodbye, weekend! I'll miss you!

The sun came out for the first time in days today. I made sure I slipped outside to feel its warmth on my skin. I've heard it's only visiting for a couple of days, then it's off again ... a gypsy sun, just popping in and out... so I didn't want to miss it!

I wish it had paid a visit this weekend. Instead, a cold misty rain hung around, which wouldn't have been bad if it had been a slow weekend close to home, one spent watching movies, reading, writing, keeping the fire going in the wood-burning stove...

But it wasn't. We had plans. Places to go. Things to do. And we didn't let that rain stop us, either, by golly!

Friday night Tom learned why I'm in love with Eddie V - and I think he might have fallen in love himself! We met my friend Tamara and her husband Rod there, just like my first rendezvous with Eddie V (it's a "where", not a "who", in case you're wondering), and again, for several hours I was in Taste Bud Heaven. The best part was getting to spend time with Tamara and Rod, though, and having Tom finally be able to enjoy their company as well.

Saturday evening we ignored the rain again and headed downtown to meet up with some of my former high school classmates and even some alumni I didn't know! Many of them traveled from the Houston area in the yucky weather for the gathering at Fado's, where lots of talking, laughing, reminiscing, eating, drinking, and listening of music ensued... specifically music by the band Mysterious Ways, a U2 tribute band, befitting an Irish Pub. 

The part for my versatile lens didn't arrive in time, so I did the best I could with my zoom... mostly photos of the band...

(I was playing around with the settings and got this one somehow - I think it's kind of creepy and cool at the same time!)

 

 

...and this one of me and my 9th grade boyfriend, Larry...

But before you get any ideas, look at this... you'll see Larry got around that night...

Sunday was my day-before-empty-nest day (see my last post), totally focused on TG... church, shopping, eating, delivering, hugging, and saying goodbye... for now. I refused to worry or stress about anything else except enjoying the time with her and helping her get a good start on the semester.

So far, I'm sticking with my resolution... what about you?

...I said hey, hey, hey, don't let another moment pass away...

 

 

Today I also thought about the impact Martin Luther King, Jr. made on our country. He was a man, just like any other... he had his faults, his sins... but that only shows that each of us is capable of more than we thought possible, too. These are some of his quotes that I call my favorites... they apply today as much as they did then.

Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase. 

He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it.
He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it. 

Never forget that everything Hitler did in Germany was legal. 

Means we use must be as pure as the ends we seek. 

Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into friend. 

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. 

Gray Days and Peace

A gray day spent dealing with frustrations over computer glitches, rude people, and staff who are so quick to deny responsibility for a problem that they fail to listen or offer productive advice (their job - what my money is paying them to do.)

A day I dreaded, because I anticipated all of these problems and I have a bad temper, sometimes volcanic, one that can crumble into tears and that's especially triggered by rude people who don't do their jobs, by bullies, and by people who abuse their position or power.  

I didn't want to lose my temper today, although I think anger has its place, if it's justified and channeled into peaceful, productive action or awareness.

Which mine often isn't.

Peace. I want to be at peace...think peaceful, loving thoughts. I want to focus on my blessings.

Rude, uncaring people ruffle my peace and too often blind me to my blessings.

But that's my challenge. Something I have to learn to deal with and not allow, for the sake of my own spirit. I've gone the tit for tat route before; it doesn't make me happy, that's for sure, and never fixes a problem. Usually, it makes it worse.

“Nonviolence means avoiding not only external physical violence but also internal violence of spirit. You not only refuse to shoot a man, but you refuse to hate him.” ~Martin Luther King, Jr.

I spotted this on Facebook (thanks, Ellen!)... posted, I'm sure, in light of the tragic shootings in Tucson.

I've witnessed a lot of finger-pointing over the shootings.  It's true, many politicians and political commentators - red, blue and all colors in between - use incendiary rhetoric, toss off half-true accusations and insults and call each other names ... then off-camera they pat each other on the back, smile, shake hands. To them, it's just part of the job. A game, perhaps. A carry-over from their high school debate team days. They don't understand how their words are often seeds planting hatred and mistrust in frustrated people. 

I hope the shooting leads to an awareness of the problem, to verbal responsibility and a call for kindness among our lawmakers and media.

But remember "When you point a finger in blame at someone else, you have three more pointing back at yourself!"

If any of us nonpolitical types spouts off at someone else, calls someone an insulting name, forgets to put ourselves in their shoes or try to see an issue from any angle but our own, if we repeat the inflammatory stories (especially without checking the facts first) then I think we're also guilty of contributing to the dark energy that feeds people like Jared Loughner.

I promised myself that today I would remain calm. I prayed to be filled with love and understanding, with eyes open to my blessings, even as I was faced with a cold, gray day and potentially temper-triggering frustrations.

It was the least I could do for the victims of the shootings.

And it worked...for the most part.

I'm going to try it again tomorrow. What about you?

Remember this? Click on the image for a reminder.

 

 

Pink Skies, Random Thoughts

Pink clouds, pink skies have greeted my ascension to the dirt road the past two mornings ... a nice change from the woolen grays and mist that have been waiting up there for me lately.

I've noticed that a pink sky or one filled with clouds that look dipped in pink-orange paint lighten my heart and make me feel like anything at all is possible that day, and even if the day doesn't turn out quite as great as I thought it would, the memory of that sunrise gets me through it.

*********************************************

 

"The King's Speech" is an awesome movie! If I had ten thumbs, they'd all be UP! You'd think a movie about a speech therapist and his patient would be boring, but this one kept me hooked the whole time.

There are no glitches in the screenplay whatsoever - it flows so smoothly you forget it's a movie! The acting , photography, dialogue, everything ... flawless!  

Add a pre-movie dinner with dear friends, a bag of fresh movie popcorn and a few pieces of chocolate, and you've got yourself one fantastic Wednesday night!

Well, I had myself one fantastic Wednesday night, anyway...

 

*****************************************************************************

 

Hubby's having surgery for a deviated septum tomorrow morning - the result of his accident back in '98 wherein his face was split open and this amazing plastic surgeon welded his nose back together.

We're hoping the surgery helps with Tom's headaches. Please say a prayer for him.

 

***************************************************

 

Life is unfair. I already knew this, of course, but I had a fresh course in the lesson today. Briefly... a couple of years ago a dump truck slammed into my sister's car. I mean slammed, as in he wasn't paying attention and didn't see that she'd had to stop and he didn't apply any brakes at all.

Miraculously and thankfully, she wasn't hurt. But instead of checking to see if she was okay or apologizing, he immediately started trying to squirm out of the blame - his business was at risk, after all.

Well, thank goodness witnesses were around and he had to pay for the damages, etc.

His trial finally came around today, but the prosecutor (a volunteer! have you ever heard of that?) didn't present the accident report or bring up the fact that the driver's insurance had paid for my sister's car. He didn't have any evidence ready at all - he just used my sister's photographs!

To the jury it was a "he said - she said" case, so I can't really blame them for finding the guy not guilty, I guess. But shame on the driver and shame on the prosecutor. And let this be a warning to all of you in Houston that thanks to the prosecutor and the jury, this guy is still out on the road. It makes me wonder how many other cases go through the court system like this, where a volunteer prosecutor doesn't feel a case is worth the time it takes to do it right.

 

 ***********************************************************************************

 

Remember Mam-ma's piano?

It turns out my mother isn't that eager to get rid of it - she just wants it out of her livingroom, but didn't want to impose on anyone by asking us to move it back into Mam-ma's room. (deep sigh.)

So next time we're there, we're moving it. And I've asked my mom to make a list of everything else she would like done - I think I've convinced her we'd love to do whatever we can and help out however we can and it would make us happy and we won't feel imposed upon at all.

But I might have to come out with a "you never let me...!" to get my way. (It always worked when I was growing up!)

 

*****************************************************

 

Okay, what the heck is up with mascara these days? Is it just me? I have tried every brand, every type (within my budget, that is) and no matter how much they proclaim not to clump or flake, I can't find one single tube of mascara that doesn't do one or the other or both. This latest one I bought makes me look like Liza Minnelli, for goodness sake, it's so thick and clumpy, despite promises on the package to do neither. Any suggestions out there? 

 

*****************************************************************************

 

Today is my sweet friend Darla's birthday - Darla, my Secret Santa from last year, deserving star of "Late Love is from Heaven" and gracious hostess of my best birthday party ever, and I missed celebrating with her tonight because of another obligation I had to fulfill - attending a city council meeting, of all things.

Yes, instead of toasting my friend with a yummy margarita, I was sitting in a small room listening to small town politicians twist facts, but at least ultimately (thanks to an important clear-headed few and the democratic process) the vote went our way, which made me feel a teensy bit better about missing the celebration.  

And the margarita.

But just a teensy bit.

Happy birthday, Darla! I'll celebrate with you soon! (When you're over 50, it's okay to keep celebrating all year long...)

 

 ************************************

 

And now here are a couple of videos I feel the need to share. The first is "Phoenix Burn" by Alpha Rev, a group from Austin. It's just the lyrics set to music - I couldn't find a real video. Sorry! But the song has been haunting me for a few weeks - thank goodness it always lifts me up! But I love these lines: 

I wanna push through the undiscovered
Find my answers, leave them uncovered
I wanna speak out what I believe in
That love will heal us, give us our freedom
I wanna see what's on the horizon
Change directions, stop the fightin
I need to find a way of letting it go
When everything falls apart...

 

 

And this is one Tom just showed to me - it's a single dad and his daughter. Guaranteed to put a smile on your face! 

"Hey, hey, hey - don't let another moment slip away!" (Singing my New Year's Resolution)

I don't normally make resolutions - I figure if there's an improvement to make or goal to set, why not start today, right now?

But this year is different. I'm adopting a song as my New Year's Resolution, a chant for the coming year to help me get through those inevitable stormy days:  "Hey, Hey, Hey" by Michael Franti & Spearhead. 

Everytime I hear it, it lifts me up. Makes me smile. Inspires me to look forward, to believe anything is possible, to know that I can make a difference.

It reminds me that no matter how bad things get, as long as we have tomorrow, there's hope.

And I think that's a good way to head into a new year.

A friend of mine says he's calling 2011 "The Year of YES!" I like that,and it fits right in with the song.

So here are a few of my New Year's Resolutions for 2011 (borrowed from the song):

1. I'll believe that everything is possible
2. I'll live for the ones that I love
3. I'll love for the life that I live
4. I'll try to hold on
5. I will remain with you, my friend
6. No matter how life is today, I won't let another moment slip away.

Have you made any New Year's resolutions? Please share!

This will probably be my last post for 2010; tomorrow is going to be jam-packed until well after midnight. So here's my wish for the new year: I hope 2011 is good to each and every one of you!

I'm grateful for those of you who have taken the time to read my words here. I hope in some small way they've made life sweeter for you, because just knowing you're there has made life sweeter for me!

If you have the time, take a few minutes to listen to the song, if you've never heard it. The words are below. Happy New Year!

 

 

 

"Hey, Hey, Hey" by Michael Franti & Spearhead

It’s been a long time coming that I had to say
When I wake up in the morning all I do is pray
For some guidance and protection on the streets today
And an answer to the questions I ask everyday

So tell me why do the birds that used to fly here
Tell me why do they come to die here?
And all the kids that used to run here
Tell me why do they load their guns here?

I remember in the days when
We were one heart, no need to defend
I just wrap my arms around you
Don’t give up, this song is for you

Hey, hey, hey
No matter how life is today
There’s just one thing that I got to say
I won’t let another moment slip away

I say hey, hey, hey
No matter how life is today
There’s just one thing that I got to say
I won’t let another moment slip away

I hold on, I’m trying to hold on
I hold on, hold on, hold on

From the tops of the buildings to the streets below
Between the Wall Street banks and the empty homes
Between the lines of the people standing all in a row
There’s a crack in the gutter where a flower grows

Reminding me that everything is possible
Yeah, reminding me that nothing is impossible
You gotta live for the one that you love you know
You gotta love for the life that you live you know

Singing hey, hey, hey
No matter how life is today
There’s just one thing that I got to say
I won’t let another moment slip away

I’ll sing hey, hey, hey
No matter how life is today
There’s just one thing that I got to say
I won’t let another moment slip away

I hold on, I’m trying to hold on
I hold on, I’m trying to hold on

Until the morning comes again
I will remain with you my friend
And we will ride until the sun
Goes to the place where it begun
And we will live to laugh and cry another day

Don’t let nobody ever tell you that it couldn’t be done
Don’t let nobody ever tell you that we couldn’t be one
Don’t let nobody ever tell you that it shouldn’t be sung
Don’t let nobody ever tell you you’re the only one

Singing hey, hey, hey
No matter how life is today
There’s just one thing that I got to say
I won’t let another moment slip away

I say hey, hey, hey
No matter how life is today
There’s just one thing that I got to say
I won’t let another moment slip away

Whoa, oh, oh, oh, I hold on
Whoa, oh, oh, oh
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, I hold on
Whoa, oh, oh, oh

I’m just trying to hold on
Trying to hold on
Trying to hold on

I say hey, hey, hey
No matter how life is today
There’s just one thing that I got to say
I won’t let another moment slip away

I say hey, hey, hey
No matter how life is today
There’s just one thing that I got to say
I won’t let another moment slip away

I hold on, I’m trying to hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on

[Michael Franti & SpearHead- Hey Hey Hey Lyrics]

@ www.SongLyrics.com

 

Out of the Silence, Music

Out of the silence, Music.

Out of the darkness, Light.

Out of uncertainty, Promise.

Merry Christmas Eve, everyone. This verse came to me via email, a Christmas card from a friend. I love the simplicity of it and wanted to share it with you.

I'm bleary-eyed and worn out, still working my way down a neglected Christmas to-do list after spending a late night hanging out with my kids and their friends, hearing their stories of work and travel and life after college, wondering how these kids who I swear were in high school yesterday got so dang grown up. (Our gift exchange started early - the gift of time with each other.)

But it's a good "worn-out". I've been relatively stress-free all day because I'm only focusing on the things that truly matter. Quality over quantity, and by quality, I don't mean expensive, I mean thoughtful, sincere, given with love.

Where charity stands watching and faith holds wide the door

the dark night wakes — the glory breaks, Christmas comes once more.

~Phillips Brooks

So I'm off to (attempt to) make Spinach Enchiladas because I know TG loves them. I doubt if mine come close to the ones at Case Ole, but I'll try. That's my gift to her. And I'll make chicken quesadillas for everyone else, because I know they do NOT love Spinach Enchiladas. Even the ones at Casa Ole.

For my Friday Favorite Photo(s), I'm including a few from a get-together at my friend Darla's house last weekend. Her home was full of Christmas spirit ... there were the beautiful decorations, flickering candles and food ... a gathering of wonderful long-time friends, for which I'm very grateful ... and the approach of a first Christmas together for Darla and Roy. This time last year they had just begun a friendship which blossomed quickly into a romance, then soul-tingling love, and culminated in a June Wedding.

Seeing them together helps you believe in magic and miracles and Christmas wishes come true.

Out of the silence, Music...

 

 

 

No Red Moonbeams for Me ... A Long Hollow Update

"It's starting to feel more like Christmas to me. The temps are staying low, there's the smell of wood smoke in the air, my tree is up and decorated, cards are trickling in, and TG is home."

I wrote this several days ago - just one of many posts that wither on the vine because I run out of time to finish them before they're outdated. Those low temps are a mere memory for me now ... today might have been the first day of the winter solstice, but it felt like shorts and flip-flop season here again.

Even so, I do feel Christmas with all of the twinkling lights, the Merry Christmas wishes everywhere, get-togethers with friends, and the anticipation of having all of my kids back in the nest in just a few days...

And though it's not much, I've gathered a few gifts for others - just thinking of giving helps bring on the Christmas spirit, doesn't it? 

I think it's the power of the Christmas spirit that has kept me from caring too much about my camera lens or worrying about replacing it or being too upset about all the cloud cover that kept me from witnessing red moonbeams last night during the lunar eclipse.

I captured a few okay photos of the moon, some before the eclipse started and a half dozen during the partial, but during the total eclipse, the paparazzi clouds crowded around so close I couldn't even get a glimpse! I'll post the ones I snapped on Confessions later - and I'll resist tinting them. (Well, I might play with one or two, but I'll 'fess up about it.)

Meanwhile, here's a quick Long Hollow update:

....We're officially in a drought again - the bill has arrived for all of those beautiful, sunny days we've been blessed with the last few weeks, I guess. It's hard to believe just a few months ago the creek and ponds were flooding, and now they're drying up by feet a day.

In the mornings on the back deck, I can still hear the little waterfall, but it's barely a dribble now and will soon be gone. There's no promise of any significant rain for months.

....Rocks have appeared on the side of the damn dam - not just piles of rocks, but orderly rocks, reminding me of the old stone bridges in Virginia. If the stonework is continued all down the side, it wouldn't be such a sore sight. Still not as beautiful as the pond we had before, but not quite the scar we've had on the edge of our property, either.

....There are still a few small flowers blooming along the road...or at least there were a couple of weeks ago when I took these. I've been walking in the dark lately!

....The bad news is, these vicious burs are also growing, in the field where Belle and Max like to chase mice. We pulled dozens and dozens out of Max's fur a few weeks ago - like velcro on velcro!

....We're heading into Cedar Fever and Major Allergy Attack Season here in Austin. Juniper berries are ripe, waiting for the pollen explosions that look like a tree has caught on fire - poof! These warm temperatures just feather that love nest along.

My challenge this year is to capture one of those explosions on my camera. Tough to do! You never know which one is about to blow! And part of the challenge will be keeping my camera focused while I'm sneezing!

....The rest of this week I'm just focused on Christmas, though - on the simplicity of love and of giving, exemplified by the birth of Jesus so many years ago. I'm going to send cards out to those who I know look forward to them (and will forgive me if they arrive a day or two after Christmas Day), wrap up a few gifts that I hope will bring smiles to faces I love, and tomorrow I get to visit Hope House again, witnessing and recording the youth of our church bringing smiles to the faces of others - of strangers - with pizza, gifts, a few off-key carols, but mostly with the proof that someone cares.

I hope you have a beautiful Christmas week, simple and full of love.

 

 

What's in Your Box?

It's been a morning of sadness for me. A morning for shedding tears.

Several emails waited quietly in line to inform me that a friend from my DuPont days was killed over the weekend. 

Roger wasn't one of my closest friends out there - I'm not sure if we ever even worked the same shift, and if you weren't on the same shift, you rarely saw someone. When you were off, they were working, and vice versa.

But we hired on at the same time and spent several months together in a portable building, learning how to be plant technicians while the columns and structures across the street slowly grew into a methanol and syngas plant. And for the next thirteen years our paths criss-crossed at shiftchange and shutdowns and hours of overtime (his, not mine) when I'm sure we spent time together.

I know we did because, even though conversations from just this past weekend are already wispy clouds, drifting from my memory, I have no trouble recalling Roger's voice describing some of the fun times he had as a Houston policeman, and I can vividly picture him standing in the hallway near our lockers, hear him singing "Guac-a-mole in my shoes" (to the tune of that old Joe South song, "Walk a Mile in My Shoes") in his big country voice.

I hear him singing it every time I fix guacamole, in fact.

He was a good singer - Tom and I went to hear his band once, years ago. I had forgotten about that until now. 

And just a couple of weeks ago I was telling TG an embarrassing story about myself that involved Roger; thanks to him, I learned to think twice about what I wore to the plant. It was a lesson in double entendres...

...I collected concert t-shirts...I often wore them to work (pre-Nomex days)...my boyfriend and I had just gone to see "Cheap Trick"... 

Got the picture? Roger glanced at me and said, with a wink, "Cheap trick, huh?"

And I blushed. Up until that moment, I swear I thought by "cheap trick". the band meant "being mean to someone". You know, playing a dirty trick on them. It never, ever hit me that it meant...well, you know.

Not a smart thing to wear when you're one of a handful of women in a male-dominated, mostly male-populated workplace, and I was always grateful to Roger for waking me up to those kinds of things. He knew I was just naive.

But it truly amazes me (and it amazed TG) that I could be so naive!

I have no idea what happened to that shirt. It had been a favorite until then...I do know I never, ever wore it to work again.

Anyway, I was lucky I worked with guys like Roger...guys who would joke around with me, but showed respect and were ready to protect me, like a bunch of big brothers.

So when I read that he died a hero, trying to protect someone, I wasn't surprised.

According to the articles (here and here), Roger and his wife were at a friend's bar celebrating a birthday. The assailant started an argument with the friend, pulled out a revolver and shot him. Roger tried to wrestle the gun from the man and was shot during the struggle.

Roger and his wife would have celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary on Dec. 19...

I knew from working with Roger that he was a good guy...but reading his obituary revealed, as they so often do, just what kind of good guy he was:

"Roger was a Master Mason and member of the Texas City Lodge 1118. He was a Shriner with the El Mina Shrine Temple in Galveston and was very dedicated to helping “his kids”. He participated in many benefits in Galveston County – helping in any way he could to raise the necessary monies that “his Shrine kids” needed.

Roger loved fishing, hunting, and cooking. He loved to cook for a crowd and for 5 years he had a shrimp boil for the Shriners Hospital employees just to let them know he cared and appreciated their hard work and dedication. He was also a wonderful musician and loved to “pick and grin” any chance he got."

I thought about my post from yesterday, about each day being a gift from God. Roger lived that theory, filling up each day he was given and giving back so much of himself.

Gifts and giving. I thought about Christmas gifts, thought about some of my favorites, including one from my brother Donnie years ago when I was about 5 and he was 10...a shoebox full of some toys he didn't want anymore, like this funky orange rubber motorcycle.

When I opened the box, though, I didn't see a bunch of unwanted toys; I saw a box full of treasure... these were toys that I identified with my big brother, toys I had coveted. He knew I would want them. Starting with an empty box, he carefully chose the toys and placed them in there himself, one at a time, then wrapped it up for me; it was a gift of love.

At that moment I imagined our lives as an empty box - that's really our gift...what we're given. It's up to us to fill it, and to choose what, if anything, we put in it each day. Ultimately, we're just giving it back, and the gift we're given is the freedom to make what we give back a gift of love or a gift to toss in the trash. 

Reading his obituary, it's obvious Roger's box overflowed with good things; I could feel him winking at me, reminding me to stop and think about what was in mine, just like he made me stop and think about what I was wearing so many years ago. 

Rest in peace, Roger, and thanks for continuing to be a good guy in a world where we can't afford to lose a single one. 

 

(Roger's the 2nd tall one from the left in the back...I'm the 2nd one from the right in the middle row...not a great photo, but hey, it's from 1978!)

(Our first company Christmas party...Bob on the left, Roger on the right. I'll be nice and just say they were very different.)

Photo from his obituary...he still looks exactly the same to me as he did two decades ago... maybe a full box is the secret of youth.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The unthankful heart...

...discovers no mercies;

but let the thankful heart sweep through the day and,

as the magnet finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour,

some heavenly blessings!

~ Henry Ward Beecher

 

May all of us have thankful hearts this day. 

No matter where we are, what our circumstances, what our nationality or religion or beliefs or other iota that makes us each unique, we can all find at least one thing for which to give thanks.

But I hope you find many, many, many. Happy Thanksgiving!

 

 

 

 

Gray Skies, Love, and other pieces of my morning

Gray skies accompanied me and the pups on my walk this morning, but they didn't reflect my thoughts for a change. Even though I'm missing Tom, it's been easier for me to focus on my blessings lately...just in time for Thanksgiving!

Because of that, I was able to appreciate the soft gray sky and the balmy breeze. We've started the Texas Winter Dance...two steps forward, one step back. If I haven't lived here all of my life, and I hadn't been watching the weather forecast warning of a cold front headed our way, it would be easy to believe we were skipping right over Winter and right into Spring.

Lately, I'm doing a better job taking each day as it comes...actually, each moment as it comes...and being grateful for it, all by itself, rather than as just another stepping stone into the future.

I confess I've had a little help from Mother Teresa with the attitude adjustment. Along with my coffee in the quiet house every morning, I like to read something inspirational or reflective - just bite off a small piece and chew on it till the next morning.

A few days ago I started re-reading her book No Greater Love. The effect on me is like throwing open the windows to let in sunshine and fresh air. If you haven't read it, I encourage you to, no matter what your beliefs. I believe her wisdom and insight go beyond religion, and there's something in her words for everyone. Her Christianity is plain, but she's not preaching. Of course, I'm a Christian, so maybe that's just my perception.

I'm including the section I've been chewing on today, so you can see for yourself...

"Always be faithful in little things, for in them our strength lies. To God nothing is little. He cannot make anything small; they are infinite. Practice fidelity in the least things, not for their own sake, but for the sake of the great thing that is the will of God, and which I respect greatly.

Do not pursue spectacular deeds. We must deliberately renounce all desires to see the fruit of our labor, doing all we can as best we can, leaving the rest in the hands of God. What matters is the gift of yourself, the degree of love that you put into each one of your actions.

Do not allow yourselves to be disheartened by any failure as long as you have done your best. Neither glory in your success, but refer all to God in deepest thankfulness.

If you are discouraged, it is a sign of pride because it shows you trust in your own powers. Never bother about people's opinions. Be humble and you will never be disturbed. The Lord has willed me here where I am. He will offer a solution."

Okay, I guess she does mention God in there quite a bit. But her words do encourage me - I hope some of you find encouragement in them as well, and the others aren't offended.

To lighten this up, here's a little Thanksgiving humor, courtesy of my friend Cheryl...(I'm grateful for my crazy friends...) 

Hope you're having a wonderful, reflective, peaceful Thanksgiving week.

 

Connected

 

Each of us stands our ground, doing our best to remain upright through the elements...

 

We're pushed and shoved by the weather...

By life. By time.

We have our own space, separate from the rest, vulnerable to the wind in just a slightly different angle than the next one...

...but that's good, because we're connected, each one of us, and when one is feeling the pressure, when the wind is pushing and pushing, our connections hold us up, keep us from falling. 

When the wind shifts direction, as it always does, it's our turn to brace and hold and keep the other from falling, and in that way we all stand, tall and strong.

What would I do without my friends...those that stretch back to the horizon with me, and those who have joined in recently, adding strength by numbers...

...my unique and beautiful fence posts, standing with me... guarding, shielding, protecting... joined by memories, blogs, shared passions... 

....my tough-as-barbed-wire connections.

This post was my contribution to Jillsy's One Word Wednesday..."Connect". To join in, or to just see the other contributions, go HERE...

Today I'm grateful for all of my connections...friends and family, young and...not so young, male, female, long-time and brand new...

Thank you for the times you've helped hold me up, kept me standing, when I just wanted to fall.

Pen-Pals, Paradise, and other wishes come true

Years ago, my grandparents had a little cabin near Lake Medina, in the hills west of San Antonio. As you can see from this photo of Grandad on the front steps, it wasn't much to look at...and "little" is an understatement...

But in my mind, a weekend at the cabin was a trip to Paradise! I remember the narrow, twisting roads leading to the cabin...remember one night the headlights catching a roadrunner crossing just in front of us...remember the heavenly smell of juniper.

To the best of my memory, inside the cabin there was a front room furnished with bunk beds, a sleeper sofa, and a coffee table where we played Chinese Checkers.

(I love Chinese Checkers!)

Adjacent to it, like the base of an "L", was a kitchen, including a small formica dining table. Grandmother and Granddad's bedroom took up the rest of the space, except for a closet that ran between it and the front room, with doors opening into both...my "secret passageway"...

Oh, the bathroom was right off the kitchen, too. Sort of. You had to step through the back door, follow a path a few feet to a small building. Yep, an honest-to-goodness outhouse.

I never had to go at night. Or if I did, I've blocked it from my memory. 

My grandparents loved to fish. I mean, loved to fish!! We'd spend hours down at the lake - mostly I swam and played on the shore. I've never been that crazy about fishing, but every once in a while I'd sit with a cane pole and try.

Later, they'd sit outside the cabin and clean the fish. I think we had fried catfish every night for dinner. Fine by me - I didn't like to fish, but I loved fried catfish. 

So why was this paradise to me if I didn't love to fish?

Well, I've mentioned the smell of the juniper. I loved it. And I loved the rocky ground, so handy for stacking into walls.

I love rock walls.

I was allowed to roam through the oak and juniper woods a little, and I discovered this old shack one day...probably an old deer blind. I would imagine it as a pioneer house in the wilderness, or an outlaw's hangout in the old West...or who knows what else I'd turn it into.

And if I could convince someone to come with me, I would head to the end of the street and hike through a small ravine, essentially a dry creek bed. In some places the walls rose 15 to 20 feet on either side, pitted with small holes - homes for wild animals.

I could hike there for hours, and would, if I could get any of the grownups to go with me.

I wished so much that I could live in a place like that...

It took more than twenty years, but my wish came true. I now live in a rocky, hilly land with twisty roads, surrounded by oak and juniper woods, and their heavenly smell that always takes me back to the cabin. There's a dry creek bed to wander along, but no old shacks falling apart nearby; I'm old enough to think that's a good thing. 

***************************************************************

Another thing I wished for about the same time were Pen-Pals. 

I loved writing letters, and I thought it would be the coolest thing ever to have friends in other countries to write to, and to get letters from, telling each other what life was like in our respective countries. Maybe even have a souvenir from another country arrive in the mail...

But try as I might, I never made any Pen-Pals outside of my country.

Until now, that is. Forty years later, that wish has come true. Almost every day, I "talk" to friends around the world, through my blog, FlickR, and Facebook. The world has become a much smaller place.

And guess what? A mysterious package arrived in the mail recently. Inside was this beautiful plate...

My friend Juana of Between USA and Spain sent it to me...a souvenir she picked up for me in Spain while she was visiting her family.

Each day she was there she blogged about what she was seeing and I loved traveling along with her. Back in 1976, I spent three days in Spain, mostly Madrid and Toledo. Juana told me she spent that summer in Madrid, and we've laughed, thinking how funny it would be if we had passed on a road somewhere.

Excitedly I dug out my pictures - maybe she would be in the background of one? But would you believe the only photos I have from those three days are of the Plaza de Toros and the Bullfighting museum...

...the Alcazar of Toledo and a view of the city...

...El Greco's masterpiece (The Burial of the Count of Orgaz), a donkey race, and some Flamenco dancers (including this one of our high school counselor JW doing the "bump" with one after their performance. JW died several years ago, so I'm grateful for photos like this one.)

I see all of the wonderful, beautiful sites from Juana's visit (and from TG's a few years ago) and wonder why I don't remember seeing all of those? I realize we were only in Spain three days, but surely, this wasn't all we saw?

My memories are foggy, though. Photos would help clear them up, but in my defense, it was the end of a month-long budget hop across Europe and I was probably down to my last roll of film. And...I know this is hard to believe...I was actually tired of taking photographs.

And...yes, I'll go ahead and admit it, a little burned-out on ancient cathedrals and gold-plated icons and masterpieces. 

But give me a break - I was only seventeen! I think the human mind can only absorb so many amazing historical sites before they all blur together.

Thank goodness Juana insists on Tom and I visiting her and her husband in Spain one day. She's even making a list of all the sites we need to see.

I just love Pen-Pals.

I've had other wishes come true...too many to list, really. But these two remind me that wishes sometimes take their time...they remind me not to give up, not to quit wishing on stars...

What about you? What wishes have come true for you, and which ones are you still waiting for?

Today I'm grateful for...

*Memories and old photographs that keep long-gone loved ones alive in my heart...

*Friendships - the ones that have lasted forever, the ones that have been rediscovered, and the new ones...all wishes come true...

*Digital cameras, cell phones, emails, Facebook, blogs, and FlickR - they keep me connected to these new and long-time friends and relatives in ways that wouldn't be possible otherwise...

 

 

 

Dona Nobis Pacem

(Click the image to learn about Blog Blast for Peace)

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:27

"Peace is not something you wish for; It's something you make, Something you do, Something you are, And something you give away."

~Robert Fulghum

"Peace is costly but it is worth the expense."

~African proverb

"Lead me from death to life, from falsehood to truth; Lead me from despair to hope, from fear to trust; Lead me from hate to love, from war to peace; Let peace fill our hearts, our world, our universe."

~Satish Kumar

Each Sunday at Mass, we turn to our neighbors, shake their hands, and say

"Peace be with you."

Immediately I feel a wave of energy; I imagine it flowing out into the world,

a positive force blasting away negative. 

Just as I join hands with my neighbors on Sundays,

today I am joining bloggers across the globe.

to speak on one subject

in one voice

for one day.

Peace.

Dona Nobis Pacem.

(Grant us Peace.)

 

Now I've been crying lately, thinking about the world as it is
Why must we go on hating, why can't we live in bliss?

~ Cat Stevens, Peace Train 

"We are not at peace with others because we are not at peace with ourselves, and we are not at peace with ourselves because we are not at peace with God."

~Thomas Merton

"If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there'd be peace."

~John Lennon

There are so, so many quotes about Peace...and all of them ring true. So many voices sounding off for Peace, from all religions and philosophies, all around the globe...yet wars still rage around the world...Why?

Maybe it's because I grew up watching the Viet Nam War played out on television and in movies...watching the protests...watching my brother go off to fight...twice...keeping track of his whereabouts with pushpins on a map of Viet Nam posted on our hallway wall...

...or maybe it's because I worked with veterans of the war, both American and South Vietnamese...listened to their stories of living in a war-torn country, leaving their homeland, chased out by the Communists...

...or maybe it's because of my fascination with Civil War and World War II histories... or because I had relatives and ancestors who fought in them...

...whatever the reason, my voice might be different than many of the other bloggers blasting for peace today, because unlike some people, I believe war is sometimes necessary, because it takes two sides to have peace, and let's face it, there are some countries, some leaders, who are too power-hungry or prejudiced or full of hate to agree to peace, if it means giving up power or control or hatred...

"When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace"

~Jimi Hendrix

Even so I believe it's wrong to quit striving for peace, to keep trying and believing peace is possible. To try anything and everything before going to war, short of giving in to tyranny and giving up freedom. 

"Peace is not merely a distant goal that we seek, but a means by which we arrive at that goal."

~Martin Luther King, Jr.

In writing my great-great grandfather's story, based on his memoir, I'm trying to be a voice for peace. He shares his experiences of a violent life before, during, and after the Civil War, but woven within the story is a longing for peace and a warning to the young. My challenge is to make sure that message is heard.

Will you help spread the word?

"If you wish to experience peace, provide peace for another."

~Tenzin Gyatso

"If war is ever lawful, then peace is sometimes sinful."

~C.S. Lewis

"The more you sweat in peacetime, the less you bleed during war."

~Chinese proverb

"Peace is not only better than war, but infinitely more arduous."

~George Bernard Shaw

"If we are to teach real peace in this world, and if we are to carry on a real war against war, we shall have to begin with the children."

~Mahatma Gandhi

"Let us forgive each other - only then will we live in peace."

~Leo Nikolaevich Toystoy

'Cause out on the edge of darkness, there rides a peace train
Oh peace train take this country, come take me home again.

Now I've been smiling lately, thinking about the good things to come
And I believe it could be, something good has begun...

(This is a beautiful version of one of my favorite songs...but if you want old style Cat Stevens, click HERE for a version from 1976.)

Thanksgiving Comes First (p.s. peace)

On my way out of the local drugstore yesterday afternoon, unable to resist a big CLEARANCE sign, I paused beside the aisle of Halloween merchandise, before remembering (duh!) I don't decorate anymore. 

That's when I spotted something green and red in the corner of my eye. No...it couldn't be. Not yet! I allowed myself one glance, and yes, sure enough, it was a shelf full of Christmas, impatiently waiting for Halloween to get the heck out of the way. 

But where was Thanksgiving?

Perhaps it was there, somewhere...probably in the form of two or three ceramic turkeys allotted a few inches of shelf space.

In a dark corner.

But I didn't stay to search for it. I could feel a scowl coming on, and I hate to react that way to Christmas.

People! It's just November, for crying out loud! 

Besides seeing it on my calendar, I know it's just November because the world is still in color. On my walk this morning, I watched the hollow come alive in pinks and golds under a crisp blue sky. The leaves are still gripping the trees, many just now changing from green to autumn gold, orange, yellow, purple...

Even the weather can't make up its mind - yesterday was gray, warm, humid. Today is sunshine and cool again...just cool enough for sweat pants and a light jacket...not my insulated jacket, hat and gloves I'll be pulling on in a few weeks for these early walks.

Can we please finish out this season? Give it its due respect? I want to relish autumn - my favorite season - a little while longer.  I have birthdays to celebrate, including my mother's, and then, of course, there's Thanksgiving.

Don't you think it's time to protest this brushing over of Thanksgiving? For one thing, if Christmas carries on too long, I worry about it losing its significance, becoming just one long shopping season.

I'm a Christian, so obviously the cheapening and over-commercialization of Christmas concerns me, but I would think even non-Christians would get tired of having it thrown in their faces for months. 

I love Christmas, but I'm not ready for green and red. (We don't need green and red when we still have oranges, yellows and purples.) But I do love the hokey-ness of Christmas, the nostalgic feel to it. I love Christmas music, Christmas movies, baking cookies, decorating the tree, wrapping gifts, hanging stockings, sending out cards (and receiving them!). It's for these very reasons that I don't want it to start until after Thanksgiving. Let's keep it special. Simple.

Besides, I don't like having to dust my snowmen collection or the Nativity scene. If you have to dust it, it's been out too long.

The truth is, retailers just don't make any money from Thanksgiving, but the potential from Christmas is outrageous. No wonder they want to get it started earlier and earlier.

It's up to us to put on the brakes. Anyone with me?

If you're a blogger, consider spreading the protest on your site. If you're a consumer...write letters or simply refuse to give in to the marketing monster until after Thanksgiving.

This post was triggered by a protest from blogger Suldog. Click HERE to read his where he makes several good points. One that really struck me was something he saw on an episode of Mr. Rogers. This is what Suldog wrote:

On one of his shows, he was explaining the concepts of noisy and quiet. In order to illustrate the difference, he took his television audience to see a musician friend of his.

Fred had the musician, a percussionist, play his many instruments. Some were very loud, while others were soft and gentle. Afterward, Mister Rogers looked into the camera and spoke. He said, "In music, the silences are just as important as the loud parts."

The silences are just as important as the loud parts.

That’s a very profound statement. It’s true, isn’t it? Without the silences, it’s all just noise. The silences – the pauses, the gaps, the unfilled spaces – are what give the notes their power and meaning. And when it comes to a holiday, the silences – the quiet times preceding (or even within) the holiday – are extremely important. They give the celebration its power and meaning. That’s why I care so deeply about this. We all need some silences. They’re just as important as the loud parts.

Thanksgiving is a silence we need. A time to ponder and reflect and be still for just a bit. To remember the good things in our lives instead of focusing on the negative.

In honor of Thanksgiving, at the end of each post this month, I'm going to share a few things I'm grateful for. I thought of these this morning on my walk...

Today I'm grateful Tom wasn't involved in the accident along his route to work that I heard about on the news ...I'm grateful my friend Randy was reunited with his lost dog Chuck...I'm grateful I live in a country where I am free, where I can vote...

...which is what I did this evening. I sure hope you voted, too!

P.S. Thursday, November 4, is a special day. Bloggers around the world will join together for a Blog Blast for Peace.

This will be my first year to participate (thanks to Jillsy for the heads up!) and I'm already feeling the energy. Please join me by blogging (click HERE to find out more about Blog Blast for Peace) or by just taking a few minutes that day to wish for peace, or...whatever you can think of that might promote peace. (On Thursday, leave me a comment and let me know what you did.) 

The Man in the Doorway

We should never be ashamed to own
that we have been in the wrong,
which is but saying that we are wiser today than we were yesterday.

Alexander Pope

Thank you Mr. Pope, but I'm still ashamed to tell this story - I fear I'm no wiser than on the day it happened. But the image is fresh in my mind, a constant reminder that I get caught up in my own life and my needs too much... so focused inward or on my immediate circle that there are times my eyes don't really see, or at least do no more than see on the surface.

But here it is. My confession.

TG and I pulled into a parking lot adjacent to a Mexican food restaurant near campus; she was hungry, and as her mother, I wanted to feed her. It was also a good excuse to spend a little more time with her.

The lot was empty... obviously the restaurant wasn't open. I swerved toward the building to make a loop and head back to the road, and that's when I caught a glimpse of him - the man in the doorway.

 He was curled on his side on the ground in the alcove of the restaurant's entrance. An empty wheelchair sat beside him as he slept. 

At least I think he was sleeping. I hope he was sleeping. That's one of those questions that started nagging me the next day, along with that image... was he just asleep, passed out from drinking? What if he had been beaten up and left there? What if he was dead, or left for dead?

There are so many homeless persons wandering the streets downtown, asking for money, sometimes aggressively. Not long ago, a pedestrian was stabbed by a homeless person. 

When I saw this man lying there, I'm ashamed to say my first thought wasn't to get out and help, to see if he was okay. No, it was to get the heck away, to protect my daughter, even though I didn't think about it in those terms. No thinking, just action. A flight instinct that I'm sure is very human, but one I still regret, even though I still don't believe it would have been wise to approach him on our own.

But instead of just heading to another restaurant, I should have done something for this man. I'm just not sure what, though. But I don't believe in coincidence, so it weighs on me that my path was led to that parking lot for a reason. And I get the feeling I blew it.

What bothers me the most is how easily the man slipped from my mind... until the next day. And now his image won't go away.

What could I have done? What would you have done? I want to be ready next time. At least I hope I get another chance.

On the last day, Jesus will say to those on His right hand, "Come, enter the Kingdom. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was sick and you visited me." Then Jesus will turn to those on His left hand and say, "Depart from me because I was hungry and you did not feed me, I was thirsty and you did not give me to drink, I was sick and you did not visit me." These will ask Him, "When did we see You hungry, or thirsty or sick and did not come to Your help?" And Jesus will answer them, "Whatever you neglected to do unto one of these least of these, you neglected to do unto Me!"

 

 

The Elusive and Slippery Right Perspective

A rainbow arched across the sky right in front of me last night as I headed down the highway toward Austin. I mean, right in front of me, crossing from one side of the road to the other, with the most crisp, sharp color spectrum I've ever seen in a real rainbow. It was like one out of a kids' book, with the colors perfectly lined up, side by side, and it was right in front of me! Straight ahead! Oh, why didn't I bring my camera?

Rainbows. Promises. It made me smile. I've had a lot on my mind... lots of worries trying to break free and wreak havoc... and I haven't been getting a lot of sleep. The rainbow reassured me, helped me remember to just take things a day at a time.

I looked forward to the next few hours with the Girl, shopping for a some last things she needed before school started. My kids don't have cars at school - we're down to just the two Tom and I are driving - so they have to rely on us or the charity of friends with cars if they need to get around. I don't really mind - it's a good excuse to spend time with them.

I picked up the Girl and we spent the next several hours zipping around Austin highways, searching in futility for specific stores that had the best bargains (she had done her research - that's my Girl!) I stubbornly avoided driving all the way back to my side of town; I knew those stores were there - I just didn't want to drive that far! Subsequently we went in huge circles, missed exits, and encountered tons of traffic. I was tired and stressed with zillions of things buzzing around in my head, and so was she. Two exhausted, stressed women wandering Austin highways in the rain with no clear sense of where they are headed and the clock ticking ever-nearer to closing time doesn't equal a fun shopping experience. (Oh, how I wished I had the internet - Google! - on my phone last night!)

Somewhere, on one of those highways, the Right Perspective slipped clean away.  We both lost our tempers. And that's all I'll say about that.

Eventually, we found what we were searching for just before closing time... on my side of town, of course. If I had just headed back there in the beginning...

Anyway, on the way back to campus, our senses of humor returned; we apologized and laughed at ourselves. Passing a long line of halted traffic headed the opposite way, I realized if we had finished up sooner, I would have been sitting in that line of cars for hours instead of exploring every highway in the city with the Girl. My Right Perspective returned, shaking a finger at me for being so careless with it.

What the heck had I been thinking to let myself get so worked up? Why hadn't I realized that none of those things I was worrying or stressing about mattered as much as building precious memories with this Girl I love so much? I'm such a doofus sometimes.

After dropping her off with a hug and kiss and I love you, I made a quick stop at Daniel's (another hug, kiss and I love you) then headed home via an alternate route, able to avoid the huge traffic jam only because our shopping trip had taken hours and hours and led us to the other side of town. Funny, huh?

Out my window an overstuffed half moon lit up the sky and guided me home. A rainbow, a bright moon, the Girl and Daniel. Yeah, it was a good night.

 

 

Before you throw that stone...

I'm still hoping to post part 2 of the Shallue Vacation 2010 later today, but I came across something during my break from sweating that I wanted to share right away. (Tom and I are tidying up outside... mostly taming the overgrown weeds and cleaning up the "puppy playpen" on our porch.)  

My friend Gina lives in a small town near Dallas where the mayor recently killed her 19-year-old daughter and then herself. Gina wrote about the tragedy and brought up points that I think all of us should consider in our daily lives, especially in our interactions with people and our responses to news reports on celebrities and politicians. 

What is your first reaction when you hear about a tragedy like this? What does your reaction say about you? Are you the kind of person a friend could come to with a problem? I hope I am, but Gina's post made me wonder, and I think it's always good to wonder about yourself from time to time.

Please click on this link and read Gina's post here - believe me, it's worth the few minutes...

http://ginacalvert.blogspot.com/2010/07/why-didnt-she-tell-anyone.html

Love Thy Neighbor

Yesterday morning as Max enjoyed his breakfast, I sipped my coffee and watched the clouds drift across an electric blue sky... a sky so blue I imagined God uploading it to Picasa and hitting the 'saturate' button to achieve it.

Two Great Blue Herons flew down the Hollow in front of me, following the creek towards the lake. For a second I considered rushing into the house and grabbing my camera, but chose instead to just sit there and enjoy it. Even Max stopped eating long enough to watch them, too impressed (or intimidated) to bark. 

I think we both felt we'd been blessed.

As the heron couple disappeared into the distance, I hoped they weren't leaving the Hollow for good. The ponds levels have dropped; some are completely dry. On top of that (and because of that) work has resumed on the neighboring property with a vengeance... the hum of engines now fills the Hollow, even filtering past the thick walls into our house, from sunrise until well after dark.

Large rocks cover the eroded section of the dam now. Weeds along the side are mowed short and fresh dirt is piled on top and tamped down with a rolling compactor. But it's still massive and unsightly from our view, essentially deforming our pond, making it resemble a Walmart retaining pool.

The last few months of no activity made it easy to believe it had all stopped for good. Maybe they'd changed their minds? We knew it was a long shot, but it didn't hurt to dream. However, it still wasn't a fairy tale ending, because the damage to our pond had already been done.

But now seeing the heavy equipment... hearing the engines all day... watching the smoke from a smoldering, unattended bonfire drift into the morning sky... it's like having a scab ripped off of a wound. 

I should make it clear that what frustrates us has less to do with having to look at the green wall (although that's bad enough) than it does with the total lack of respect and honesty that we've been given... as well as the lack of regard for our property and for the beauty of the Hollow. It's so... well, disheartening seems too weak of a word, but it's all that I can think of right now to describe it.

It hurts me to see Tom hurt, frustrated... disheartened... this man who would drop whatever he was doing to help a neighbor in need... and who has put so much of himself into this dream of his. 

"Do you know what happens when you assume something?"

...I can see Joe Rodriguez writing "Assume" on a chalkboard in front of our group of DuPont technicians-in-training like it was yesterday, rather than thirty years ago.

Without waiting for us to answer, he draws two slashes, dividing up the word.

"You make an 'ass' out of 'u' and 'me'."

He was warning us about "assuming" versus "checking the facts" pertaining to running the plant, but his words sunk in and have echoed as a warning bell for me ever since.

But Tom and I didn't heed Joe's warning when it came to our land. We knew the property line ran through the pond; we just assumed anyone who bought that property would keep it the way it was. Never, ever would it have occurred to us that someone would build a huge berm along that property line.

So we made asses of ourselves. (I refuse to take the blame for our neighbor.)

Not that we could have done anything about it, anyway - we couldn't afford to buy the property when it came up for sale. Nevertheless, if we had opened up our minds to the possibility of someone drastically manipulating their section of the Hollow, it wouldn't have been such a blow when it happened.

You shall love your neighbor as yourself.

These words were part of the second reading in Mass yesterday, and they hit me hard. They're still being shouted out in my brain. Echoing. Pounding.

For you were called for freedom, brother and sisters. 

But do not use this freedom as an opportunity for the flesh; 

rather, serve one another through love. 

For the whole law is fulfilled in one statement, namely, 

You shall love your neighbor as yourself. 

But if you go on biting and devouring one another,

beware that you are not consumed by one another.

Whoa! That hit way too close to home. Just a coincidence, I'm sure...

But then (would you believe it?) on NBC's Dateline last night, there was the tragic story of neighbors in California arguing over property lines, property values and differences of opinion on property 'beauty' and usage. After years of bickering, hard feelings and legal battles, all it took was a boulder placed on the property line, literally, to trigger the last fatal confrontation; one neighbor shot and killed the other two. 

So senseless. So tragic. So ridiculous! Killing someone over a piece of land?

And such a mirror to our frustrations over the dam... a warning to us of how pebbles can grow into boulders if we let them, boulders that settle in your heart, weigh down your spirit, block reason and light and true vision. 

It makes me wonder what the future holds for us. In essence, we've had a boulder placed on our property line. I don't want to leave; I also don't want us to live with resentment or anger toward our neighbor, but having been lied to and treated without respect, it's going to be a challenge to break the figurative boulder apart, knowing the real one - the dam - isn't going anywhere. 

Except I just finished reading a book, From Gravel to Glory by Gina Calvert, that demonstrates how God works in our lives using stones and boulders such as this one in ours. 

Not that I believe it was part of God's plan for our neighbor to do what he did, but what I do know is we can't let it weigh our spirits down, but rather use it to build them up somehow. Somehow, we've got to find a way to love our neighbor. Or at least find a way to let go of the hurt and frustration.

Definitely a challenge. But I'm up for it, especially after seeing how a neighbor's dispute can turn so senselessly tragic.

Besides, with God, all things are possible. I do believe that.

And by the way, I caught a glimpse of the herons this morning.