How do you deal with disappointment,
and what lessons do you have to share from those experiences?
That's BlogHer's Life Well Lived Getting Happy question of the week and it's had me sorting through my past, trying to remember disappointing moments in my life. It was tougher than I thought it would be - I think the way I deal with disappointment is to accept the feeling, try to learn from it, forgive or forget as necessary, and move on.
But I finally dug up a few disappointments: crumbled friendships that I thought were rock solid, some broken promises, missed opportunities, rejection letters...
I remember like it was yesterday finding that letter in my mailbox...the one telling me the Texas magazine wanted to publish and pay me for the very first personal essay I had ever submitted anywhere in my entire life. I was flying so high from their acceptance and the validation of my writing that I'm sure my feet never touched the ground on my way back to the house.
The low that followed when I sat down to write again was fueled by the fear of rejection. It was so scary sending that next essay out into the world, sure that people were going to read it, shake their heads, and whisper that my first success must have been a fluke.
But I made myself write it and send it out anyway. I also read all I could about famous writers who had received numerous rejection letters. It helped prepare me for my own inevitable rejection letter.
In a way, it was a relief to get that first rejection out of the way. I was disappointed, of course, but I lived. And I also learned, because the editor, Ken Hammond, let me know his reasons and encouraged me to try again.
Before the Houston Chronicle quit publishing the Texas magazine, it rejected several of my essays, but accepted and published two more. And one they rejected received an honorable mention in a Writer's Digest contest.
The thing is, disappointment is just part of life. If you want to experience the highs... if you want to appreciate the highs... well, you have to expect the lows.
You probably get bonus points for appreciating them, too.
So...
How do you deal with disappointment,
and what lessons do you have to share from those experiences?
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