Long Hollow

I give thanks for you...

 

When I was young, Thanksgiving was my least favorite holiday. There usually weren't any cousins my age to play with and the older ones didn't like me tagging along; I didn't care for most of the food (I didn't even like pie!); and after eating, everyone just sat around watching football, so I couldn't even watch television. 

Now I think back to those gatherings and wish I could have just another few minutes with all of those beloved people who have now passed on... my aunts, uncles, cousins, grandmother, and of course, my mom and dad... and let them know how grateful I am for those memories of love and laughter.  

As I grew older, my fondness for the holiday also grew. I learned to love pie and cornbread dressing, for one thing. But it was more than that. I learned to appreciate the time spent with my parents and siblings, to slow down, share stories. Eventually it was my own children sitting at the "kids" table with their cousins.  

Even after we moved to Austin, we usually traveled to my parents' home for Thanksgiving. I can still picture Mama in the kitchen checking the turkey, Daddy in his recliner in the back room watching football, and the rest of us either sitting near Daddy or drinking coffee at the kitchen table, offering our help to Mama, which she never accepted. 

But of course, with time comes change. With Daddy's passing, routine went by the wayside. Each year I've enjoyed my Thanksgiving dinner in a different place. It's not like it used to be, but that doesn't mean it's bad. My son hosted it one year for his wife's large extended family and included us. Last year Tom and I traveled alone to Florida to spend it with his mom and some of his brothers.

This year he went again, but I couldn't afford the time away. Instead, TG and I joined my son and his wife at her uncle's house. Her grandmother was there - the matriarch - along with aunts and uncles and kids of all ages. I believe there were 28 of us altogether, eating, laughing, sharing stories ... a definite flashback to those first Thanksgivings.

I've realized that no matter where I am on Thanksgiving, all of those I love are with me, because I am so grateful for each of them. Time passes and things change, but some things create such a deep impression on your heart that they are eternal. 

I hope no matter where you were today, or who you were with, you felt the presence of all of those you hold dear... all of those who love or have loved you ... gathered around, giving thanks for you as you gave thanks for them. 

 

 

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you!

 

"I thank my God every time I remember you." 

Philippians 1:3

 

 

Lesson #86 (Still teaching me! Happy birthday, Mama!)

A tiny box in the upper righthand corner of my computer reminds me that today is my mom's 86th birthday. (As if I could forget!)

However, my heart reminds me that she is so much more than those earthly years. She is free from their bonds. I feel her love around me all the time, see her in my face and my actions at times, and still hear her voice... sometimes soothing me or giving me advice ... sometimes teasing me and a tad sarcastic ... but always, always full of love. 

  

On Mama's 77th birthday, I listed the things she had taught me, and then added to it every year. After her death, I expected Lesson #84 to be the last one. It turns out she is still teaching me, so the list continues. 

When my friend Byron first mentioned a bunch of us traveling to Italy to spend a week with him and his wife after our high school reunion, I balked. First, there was the issue of time away from my business. It's not just a matter of not being around for my clients, but a good portion of my day is spent trying to find new clients to help keep my business alive ...because of issue #2: finances. We still have some debt to pay off and a house to finish!

There were just so many other things calling out for the money I would spend on a trip to Italy. 

 But... my mama's lessons came to mind, particularly #41, #58, #70, and #84.

I decided to #30 and just go for it.

 

 

The thing is (Mama's favorite phrase), she and Daddy traveled a lot after we were grown up. They drove the west coast from California to Washington, went on a cruise around the Hawaiian Islands, and visited Canada. They went to Disneyworld, Las Vegas, New York City and a bunch of other cities I don't even remember.

 

 

But Mama always dreamed of going to Switzerland and she never made it there. I'm not sure what kept them from going - probably finances or health concerns - but by NOT going, she gave me Lesson #86: Don't wait for things to be perfect to travel. Just GO!

Thank you, Mama! You were right, once again! It was a fabulous, once-in-a-lifetime trip that I will treasure forever. 

 

 

Thank you for all the lessons you gave me, whether intentional or not. You taught more by example than words... just another clue to what a wise woman I was blessed to have as my mother. 

 

 

Without further ado, here's the complete list with links to her previous birthday posts....

Things Mama has taught me...

1. it's never too late to learn something new
2. if you have a choice between laughter and tears, choose laughter.
3. don't let anyone mess with your babies!
4. only give advice when asked for it (I'm still working on that one)
5. pray every day
6. pray some more
7. reading a good book might not solve your problems, but it's a nice escape from them
8. bend but never break
9. some people are just takers
10. be nice whenever possible, but sometimes nice doesn't cut it
11. take care of family
12. we're all individuals - let your kids blossom into themselves, not "mini-me's"
13. be there
14. Johnny Weismuller is the best movie Tarzan
15. don't be in a rush to be older than you are - you're only going to be this age once in your life
16. if you like something, and you'll use it, and you can afford it, then buy it, or you'll regret it later
17. quality over quantity
18. never think "can't"
19. people will stand in line for a dead skunk if it's free
20. roll with the punches
21. have fun
22. laugh often
23. believe in yourself
24. don't let others change who you are
25. be honest
26. don't steal
27. forgive yourself
28. God loves me
29. don't judge
30. just do it!
31. inside matters more than outside
32. don't use God's name in vain
33. you can learn anything if you put your mind to it
34. you're never too old to dance
35. it's okay to ask for help
36. show appreciation and express gratitude
37. use my manners
38. consider the source
39. an office or position of authority should be respected, but the individual in that position has to earn your respect
40. sleep is good
41. take advantage of opportunities
42. keep your eyes open and your wits about you
43. people aren't always nice
44. things can't make you happy
45. use your imagination
46. just get started and the rest will be easy
47. don't be intimidated by anyone - we're all the same, all human, we all have strengths and weaknesses
48. you can love someone even if you don't like them
49. forgive but don't forget
50. learn from others' mistakes
51. there are times for being patient, and time for putting your foot down
52. speak up
53. stand up for what you believe in
54. admit your mistakes and expect others to do the same
55. persistance pays off
56. let your kids be kids
57. love unconditionally
58. take lots of pictures
59. kids grow up fast
60. your kids need a mother, not another friend
61. pets are family
62. help others
63. a sense of humor is essential for sanity and survival
64. if you look close enough, you can find something to love about everyone
65. coffee is good anytime
66. messes can be cleaned up
67. prayer works
68. God is strong all the time - let him carry you
69. if you say you're going to do something, do it
70. be nice to yourself in case no one else is
71. you have to show respect to get respect
72. girls are tough
73. don't put up with temper tantrums - yours or someone else's
74. listen to your body - doctors don't know everything
75. don't say everything you're thinking
76. asking questions is the best way to learn something
77. your babies are always your babies (and their babies are your babies, too!)
78. God is. 
79. Just listen. 
80. people are more important than things
    
81. there is a time to help others, and a time to let others help you
82. God has his reasons, and He will give you whatever strength you need for the road ahead...and never leave you to walk it alone.
83. smile and show appreciation to those who are willing to help you - they may have it tougher than you in many ways
84. Appreciate every second you're given, because life is beautiful.
85. Treasure the people in your life; take advantage of every chance you have to be with them, or to help them, even on days you don't like them.
86. Don't wait for things to be perfect to travel. Just GO!

   

"All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother." ~Abraham Lincoln

Love you, Mama. Happy birthday, and God bless you!  

Reflections on Veterans Day

 

 

Yesterday afternoon, I stood under a gray sky in the Central Texas State Veterans Cemetery paying tribute to a friend who passed away a few months ago. He had retired from the Texas Army National Guard as a Sergeant Major. We also paid tribute to his father-in-law, a retired Air Force Major, who also recently passed away.

White markers surrounded us, a testament to the sacrifice of so many for the sake of our country. 

After the ceremony, I received a text from a recent client/friend - a retired Marine. He sent me and a few others a link to "The Warrior Song - Hard Corps" in honor of the Marine Corps' birthday, which was yesterday. Just another reminder of the price that has been paid for our freedom. 

So in honor of Veterans Day, here's a re-posting of my annual tribute to the veterans in my own family, including TG's boyfriend who has been overseas for several months and still has a few to go. Please keep him and all of the others in your prayers. 

 

"Lord, if your people need me, I will not refuse the work. Your will be done."

~St. Martin of Tours

 

My big brother Buster was headed to Viet Nam, saying his goodbyes, when I stood beside him in this photograph and smiled. I had no idea what was ahead of him. This was probably taken before his first tour of duty and so he had only a vague idea himself what to expect.

When he volunteered for his second tour, however, he knew full well what he was stepping into...but he did it anyway. 

 

 

My dad was in high school when the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor. He joined the Navy soon after high school graduation because his country was at war and "it was the thing to do." 

In the next twenty-two months he traveled a long way from Texas aboard the U.S.S. Geneva...to places like the Philippines, the Marshall Islands, China, Burma, Japan.

Before he turned twenty, he had seen cities that had been destroyed by war and piles of dead bodies waiting to be buried. 

A few years later, his little brother Bobby followed his lead and joined the Navy, and many years later, so did my brother Donnie and two nephews.

 

Pop, my wonderful father-in-law, missed out on World War II, but joined the Air Force in time for the Korean War. He worked base supply in Okinawa, supporting bombers flying missions to Korea...about 100 aircraft every day.

He re-enlisted, got married, and hopped around the globe...living in England, Germany, and over a year in Pakistan, separated from his family (the other heroes - Mom had 8 teenage and younger boys to deal with by herself!)...visiting a dozen other countries...eventually staying put for awhile in Maryland, working with NSA (and a second job at the bowling alley to make ends meet), until his retirement.

A lifetime of service and sacrifice for this country.

 

My husband Tom was raised in that military family. For him it was normal to move every few years to someplace completely different...by the time he was eight or nine years old, he had lived in three countries!

He grew up on a tight budget ... hand-me-downs, powdered milk and only two cookies a day...period! And yet as soon as he could, he joined the service...the Coast Guard. Among other things, he helped rescue fisherman off the coast of Alaska.

Four of his brothers also joined the service (three career Air Force, just like their dad, and another Coast Guard) and the youngest joined the Army Reserves. Now the next generation is following in their footsteps: two Air Force and one Coast Guard, plus numerous cousins, nieces, and nephews. 

I think it's very fitting that Veterans Day shares November with Thanksgiving, a day when we slow down to remember and be grateful for things that we usually take for granted, because veterans, despite the sacrifices they make for all of us, probably don't even make it onto our Thanksgiving thank-you list.

That's how much most of us take them for granted - as well as the freedoms they protect for us. Even when our country isn't at war, they go where they are needed to unfamiliar places, away from extended family, often living on a minimum salary.

 

Thank you Daddy, Tom, Pop, Buster, Donnie, Uncle Bobby, Uncle Howard, Kenny, Steve, Joe, Robbie, John, Sheila, Michael, Tom, Lynn, Robbin, Evan, James ..and all of the other Veterans, past and present, out there! Because of you, we're free to go about our daily lives, without a thought in the world to how much that freedom costs or how much you've given.

I'd like to thank TG's B and all of the others who are continuing to step up to fill those ranks for our country... those who, through their actions, still say, "Don't worry. I got this."

I hope we always show them the support they deserve. 

 

"Freedom is never free."  ~Author Unknown

 

 

"This nation will remain the land of the free only so long as it is the home of the brave."

 ~Elmer Davis